Love and Letting Go
by LizLemonnumber2
Summary: He could be anything he wants to be. He has so much potential, I can't let him fall short. I love him, but I have to let him go. (AU FanFiction)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N – Alright, new story idea. This just happens, I can't control it. Lol. I am not going to disclose the plans I have for this, I apologize but I don't want to announce anything unless I am 100% sure and I am not 100% sure. Please let me know what you think! **

**I don't own FSOG **

**Love and Letting Go **

**Chapter 1 – The hardest thing I have ever had to do. **

**Ana**

** I hate this. **I don't revel in this feeling. Making this decision has broken my fucking heart. This is going to kill him. This is literally going to tear him apart, and I'd rather cut off my own arm then put him through this. I love him so much, and I don't want to do this to him.

After an hour of forcing myself up from the floor of Ted's room, I pull my princess cut Tiffany's engagement ring off my hand. I place it on the side table, and pick up my suit case. I look down in the crib, and I see the Ted is fast asleep. I run one of my hands through his soft brown hair and kiss him softly.

Am I ruining Ted's life? Am I making life harder on him? He will grow up in a broken home because of me. I broke our home. I am rejecting the only man I have ever loved. My son is going to be a statistic. My life is going to be a fucking statistic.

But I just have to do this. We're too young. We're too naïve. This is why you have babies when you're older; this is why you have back up protection when the first barrier falls through. His Dad said it himself, he is too smart and has too much promise to get married this young. He has to go to college, he has to use that insanely smart brain to take over the world, and he has to reach his full potential. He can't do that with a kid and his high school girlfriend that he married out of obligation. I am dead weight, I will drag him down.

I very carefully pull Ted out of his crib and place him in his carrier. Christian is with his Dad right now, and so the house is completely clear so I can make my escape. His Dad forced him to meet with another Harvard recruiter this evening. I encouraged Christian to go – he needed to go. Christian was reluctant but I am relieved that he is giving this a chance. This is how it should be, Christian can see it yet, but I am making the right choice. He deserves this opportunity.

I have no idea how I am going to get all of these bags out the door. I move the baby carrier first and set him right next to the front door. I go back and retrieve a few bags. I've left a few of Ted's personal items in the bedroom. I don't want Christian to think I am taking his baby. I never want Christian to think I am taking his baby. He will get to see his son as often as we can make it work.

Finally I am able to move all of my bags out the door. I walk quickly for my beetle and try not to drop anything. I stuff my belongings in fast, nervous that Christian will eventually show up and catch me before I can leave. I need to get to my parent's house before I lose the will to do this. He'll convince me to stay, he'll convince me to marry him, and he'll throw Harvard and his future out the window.

I walk back up the drive and open the door. Ted is still asleep in his carrier and I try to carefully walk him down to my car without rattling him. I carefully place him inside and get the seatbelt secured. I run to the driver's side, feeling nervous and anxious that Christian is going to pull back into the driveway.

As I start up my car, I see car lights shine through my back window. I stop, unsure of how to move next. He's here and he deserves an explanation, no matter how weak I am right now. I hear his feet rustle on the driveway and I open my door. Christian stops as I stand, and we gaze at each other. For the next couple of minutes, all either of us is able to do is stand and stare.

Christian looks inside my car and then looks back up at me. "Where are you going with our son?"

I take in a deep breath. "My Mom's…."

He breathes sharply, "What? Why?"

I look at the ground, praying for guidance. This is going to be so hard, and I can't give in. "How was your Harvard interview?"

His brows furrows and his eyes grow with confusion. "What?"

"I hope it went well, they need….. They need to accept you. You need to go to Harvard like your parents planned for you."

"Ana, I'm not going to Harvard…." He says, his voice shaking with each syllable.

"Yes you are…."

"No," he says, shaking his head wildly, "I'm not leaving you or him."

"You have to," I plead with him, "I can't ruin your life like that."

He shakes his head wildly, his hands running through his hair. "No….. Ana. I don't need Harvard. I need you."

"We're too young…. We can't rush into this." My voice is firm and strong despite the fact that my body could cave in at any moment.

"You listened to my fucking father," he replies, his voice hoarse, "Baby, I told you not to do that."

"He was right."

"NO HE WASN'T," he screams, "He doesn't understand anything. He doesn't understand us. You were made for me, he doesn't get that…."

"We're eighteen years old. You're going to hate me in ten, twenty years when you realize you've lived in Seattle Washington your entire life, tied to the girl you knocked up in high school," I sob, "I can't let that happen to you, I can't …. I love you too much…."

He grabs the sides of my face and kisses me tenderly on the lips. "Don't leave," he whispers, "Don't do this."

"You'll get to see him. Not when you're in Boston, but I'll never keep him from you…."

"Stop," he whispers, shaking his head, "Don't do this. Please, I am pleading with you. We can talk to my Dad; we can talk to my family. I can't be without you." I kiss him, running my fingers through his soft hair. He holds me close, and I am not completely sure that he is going to let me go.

I eventually pry myself from his body and move back to the driver's side. I check the car, making sure Ted is really asleep. Despite his parents screaming and crying, my baby is blissfully unaware of his surroundings.

"If you want to see him before you leave for Boston, call my Mom," I tell him, "We can work out custody. Whatever you need."

He seems to ignore my words, and goes around to the side of the car where Ted is sleeping. He opens the door as I climb in. He caresses Ted's small cheeks and leaves several kisses over his face. Finally after several moments of silence, Christian closes the door.

I take a second before I throw my car into drive. I'm actually doing this. I am actually walking away from him. I am doing the right thing. Before I get a chance to move, Christian is at my window.

"Don't do this, please," he says through the window, "Ana, you're wrong. I love you. I would never hate you, I would never stop loving you. I'll never regret you or Ted…."

"Go to Harvard," I say back to him, "Conquer the world. I love you."

In this moment, I do the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I put my car into drive, and I leave. I leave our house, I leave my fiancé, and I leave the life I could have had behind.


	2. Two Kids in Love

**A/N – Ok…. This may be my worst editing job. This came to me on vacation, I am typing on a computer I am not used to, and I have a time constraint on me. Please forgive, I'll fix it tomorrow. Thanks for all the input from the last chapter – you guys are the best!**

**I don't own FSOG. **

**Chapter 2 – Two kids in love**

**Christian – Present Time**

** I walk through our apartment, and I have no idea what to fucking do. **For the last two months, the first two months of my son's life, I have been at war. I have been at war with my parents, the world I live in, and practically every one I come into contact with for one reason – Ana. She is the reason why I take on all of these dumb shits. Ted and Ana hang in the balance and I have fought faithfully to keep them in my life. It looks like I lost.

My parents see Harvard in my future, and they'll do anything to get me there. I am ready and willing to spend my first year of college at the University of Washington. Washington is still a damn good school, and this way I can be with my son and Ana. I refuse to move across the country without them. In reality, my parents haven't figured out that I really don't need college. It's just a means to an end, and I can do without it.

I am not thrilled with my mother right now, but my Dad has really taken the cake. He has done nothing, but press into Anastasia's head that I need to go to Harvard. He has degraded her and caused her to feel guilty in the process and I hate the bastard for treating her like that. My mother would never go that far, but even her behavior has surprised me lately.

It is not a secret that Ana and I come from two different economic and social circles. We were only able to go to the same private school because of my Dad's influence. Ray Steele is a lower level man at my father's law firm, and he has been able to get Ana ahead because of Carrick's influence. I wish he hadn't helped Ray back so long ago. If I have to hear "I helped you into Seattle Prep, got you academic leads in life – why would you ruin Christian's life like this" one more time, I'll lose my shit.

So here I am, alone in my apartment. My son and my fiancée are gone. The two people I have done nothing, but fight have given up when I tried everything to stop it.

I don't know who I am fucking kidding – It's over. I lost. We were doomed from the beginning. She was always so good, and I ruined her. I don't deserve her, I never deserved her.

She's my angel. They'll never understand. They'll never get it. They don't understand what she means to me. They don't understand what my life will be without her.

I walk over to my pictures, the pictures I am so glad she didn't take with her.

The carnival, I did not want to go to that stupid carnival. My mother forced me to go with her because she was helping out with our school's social organization, and I needed to be monitored after being suspended for fighting. I'd never regret that fight – Dean Hoke deserved it for putting his hands on Ana like that. I am assuming her participation was the reason I wasn't immediately expelled.

A night that I thought would be complete bullshit turned into a night that I would remember forever.

**Two Years Earlier**

"**Christian, can you help us set up these last few booths," April Hale's mother asks me for the fifteenth time. **I have turned from a hoodlum to the Social's association's bitch boy. I know I punched out Dean Hoke's stupid pretty boy face, but does that really mean that I am Janna Hale's slave?

"Yes, Christian," My mom says with a sneer, "Go help. You always love to help – don't you son?"

I nod my head. I love my mother, but she enjoys playing these bitches game way too much. I owe my Mom the world, especially after everything she has done for me, so I nod my head and fake smile.

"Sure Mom."

Mrs. Hale and her fake breasts jiggle over to the last booth. I try not to look at her large tits in her small pink sweater, but it is damn near impossible. For being as old as my mother, Mrs. Hale is pretty damn hot.

Once I help her carry shit and once I help her set up shit – I decide to take a walk. My mother will be livid, but right now I need to get away. I hate the mothers of Seattle Prep - too much Chanel number five, Botox, and plastic surgery.

As I move across the grounds, I am amazed by how many booths are being set up for tonight. I didn't realize this many people actually care about our stupid fucking school. I shake my head until I see her. I see the reason I got into that fight today, those blue eyes that needed my help because Dean fucking Hoke couldn't keep his hands to himself.

After dealing with Botox County, seeing her face is refreshing. Her long brown is tied into a pony tail, and I swear I don't see a speck of makeup on her face. That's rare for this shit whole. She isn't anything like the girls at my school.

Her blue eyes are intoxicating - deep, soul searching, perfect. I could stare into them all day. Her skin is flawless, and I know those mothers running the show tonight would do anything to have skin like that. I could run my lips across the flawlessness of her skin without a second thought.

I don't know who she is, and I don't know what she was doing with Dean Hoke but I know she deserves better than him. He was trying to touch her inappropriately between classes and I wasn't going to stand for it. She was struggling, uncomfortable, and she needed me.

Suddenly, her blue eyes meet mine and I jump. I wasn't expecting her to notice me standing here. She smiles when she registers who I am, and I am frankly shocked – I wasn't expecting her to smile when she recognized my face.

"Hey Rocky," she says across the room, "Can you help? I need help putting up our sign."

"Rocky?" I ask her.

"I named you after the movie…. Of course. Please help me and we can discuss my nicknaming prowess later."

I nod and walk toward her. As I step closer to her, I feel the shock of the electric buzz between us. I didn't feel it before, and it's definitely strong and overpowering.

I grab her sign and hold it over my head. "Seattle Prep Literature Club Book Drive" is written in red glittery letters, and I can't hold back my smile.

"Book Drive?"

She laughs as if we've been best friends forever. "Yes…. Parents and students are bringing their old books for struggling schools that aren't as lucky to have such a collection."

That is seriously the most adorable thing I have heard anyone say. "Well look at you…. Looking pretty, saving the world one book at a time…."

Blush fills her soft face, and I feel my breath catch in my throat. She is beautiful. I didn't even know her when I punched out her boyfriend, but I would punch anyone else for that face.

"Do you want to help me tonight," Ana asks, putting her head down, "We're kind of understaffed."

"Yes," I answer without thinking. I'd rather be here than anywhere near my mother and the rest of the Stepford wives.

"Oh my god," her friend says from the other side of the table (I almost forgot she was there), "Ana…. Is this a good idea? He punched Dean."

"I'd punch Dean again," I tell her immediately, "No fucking hesitation."

"I could have handled myself," Ana responds back defiantly.

"Please tell me you broke up with that douchebag. You could do better…."

"You don't even know me…." She bites back, "I can handle myself."

She doesn't understand what I mean. Dear God, I hope she dumped that bastard. I move closer to her ear and squeeze her elbow.

"I may not know you, but I know when a woman could do better. I know when you're being wasted on a prick."

"Says the man who has fucked most the school," she whispers back, not holding her bitter tone. I don't fight her – she is right. My reputation isn't exactly stellar. Our eyes lock and there is so much moving between us. I don't know what I am feeling, but I know that I don't want to leave her side tonight.

"Christian Grey," I hear my mother's voice from across the room, "You know that I didn't want you to leave my side tonight…"

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Grey," she says with a quick apology.

"Ana Steele," Mom says in surprise, "I'm sorry dear; I didn't realize you'd be here."

She nods, "Yes ma'am…. Fall festival is a great time to collect books. Can Christian help me tonight? We'll definitely need it."

"You know who she is?" I ask my mom.

Mom shakes her head at me, "Of course Christian…. Her father works for your father. I don't know why such a sweet girl would want to deal with my hellion of a son for the evening."

I cannot believe her Dad works for my Dad. I like the idea of this. I can make excuses to see her.

"Just call it charity Mrs. Grey," Ana responds with a sarcastic grin, "Maybe I can teach him to read while I am at it."

My Mom chuckles as she turns to leave. "Well then keep him…. Let me know if you have problems."

"Will do," Ana calls out as she walks out the door.

"Did you break up with Hoke?"

"Did you fuck the entire school?"

I can't help but smile now. "You broke up with Hoke…. If you didn't, you aren't as smart as I thought you'd be."

She smiles and places a box of books in my hand. "Get to work Grey…. These books won't donate themselves."

**After an evening of collecting books and hiding from girls, I get the opportunity to walk Ana to her car. **I have had more fun with her then I have had with anyone for a while. I feel comfortable with her, this feels easy. Life has never felt this easy before. She is as sweet as I would have expected her to be, but she also doesn't deal with my crap. It's like getting hugged and slapped at the same time – it's an interesting combination to say the least.

"Thank you for helping me tonight," Ana tells me as she fiddles for her keys, "But I had no idea your number of ex-girlfriends was so high."

Fuck me. If I tell her that maybe two were girlfriends, I will look like such a prick. This has never been embarrassing until now.

"What can I say?" I shrug off. I decide to change the subject, hoping to get off this sore subject. "So you have to tell me – I am dying Ana….. did you break up with fucking Hoke? I don't care what you say…. He deserved that punch. I'll punch him again and again…."

Suddenly, her lips find mine. I don't know how that happened or why I got so lucky, but I don't let her stop. Once I gather my wits, I move my tongue across her lips – hoping to find passage in her mouth. She lets me through and lightly moans. I press up against her, too excited and pent up to hold back.

She lightly moves me back, and I know I can't press this any further. I almost killed Hoke for doing the same thing; I have to respect her boundaries even when I'd do anything to take her in the back seat of her car.

"I broke up with Dean, and you may be out the door before you even get a chance if you don't stop…."

I take in a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I won't let that happen again."

"I'm not going to sleep with you," she says definitely, "Dean tried to force me… and I won't do that. That's why he is gone."

I take her head in my hands and lightly kiss her forehead. "No one is forcing."

She nods, "Good."

Despite her rant, I try to kiss her again. This time, my lips move softly against hers and I try with everything in my power to keep control. When we pull away, she is panting. I smile and turn her in the direction of the driver side of her car.

"Goodnight Ana…. We have English together right?"

Realization fills her face. "We do…." She says anxiously, "I'll see you Monday."

"See you Monday…."

**Christian – Present Day**

** No… it is not ending like this. **She isn't giving me up. I am not going to let her walk away. I am going after her. She'll see reason. She's going to come with me. I don't care what it takes.

**Ana **

** As I curl in my childhood bed, I try to stay calm. **I try to live in a world where everything is good, and I didn't just walk out of Christian Grey's life – taking his son with him. I've cried so much, I can't cry anymore.

I jump when I hear the front door bang. Who would be at my parent's house this late at night? I hear feet down the hall, and the front door open. I hear voices, and I know he is here. I hear him distinctly through the walls of my bedroom.

My bedroom door flies open, and I sit up immediately. Christian moves across the room, remaining quiet due to Ted being asleep in his crib. He kneels at my bed side and runs his hands through my hair.

"You're coming with me," he whispers.

I gasp, "What are you talking about?"

"If I am going to Boston, you and Ted are coming with me."

"Christian…. That's insane. I am not moving a newborn across the country."

"I refuse to be without you or my son…." he tells me, "I refuse. We'll make it work. I don't care what we have to do…. We'll make it work."

"But Christian."

"No," he says, shaking his head, "Don't. Just say we'll make this work. Whatever happens…. You and me will get through anything."

I pull him close to me and let the heat of his body absorb me. I love him, but if this falls apart – it might kill me. I hope this works too, God… I hope this works.


	3. My Angel

**A/N – We're going to do some jumping this chapter. The first section is in the POV of Ana's high school friend and we'll end with Ana's POV. Enjoy – I don't own FSOG. **

**Chapter 3 – My Angel **

**Macy **

**As I walk out of Anatomy, in search of my best friend, I realize how much has changed in the past month. **Usually, Anastasia Steele is waiting for me outside of my classroom so we can walk home together. From there, we'd work on homework, talk about books and gossip, and sing really loudly to terrible pop music. That hasn't happened lately.

Lately, I've fallen into a much different situation. Now when I turn the corner to head home, I am greeted by my best friend, pressed up against a locker, with Christian Grey's tongue down her throat. Now don't get me wrong – I am happy for her. Her first and last boyfriend was Dean Hoke and he pretty much slobbered all over her when they kissed. It is obvious that Christian Grey knows what he is doing in that area of romance, but there is my issue.

Christian Grey is a certified man whore. He has had sex with most of the women in this school, and now he is interested in my best friend and this makes me nervous. They've been together for one month and Christian and Ana have been surgically attached to each other ever since.

As I expected, Christian has Ana pressed against a locker, and they're making out as if no one else is around them. I will say there is a difference in their kissing. When Christian Grey is with a girl, they practically molest each other in public. Ana and Christian have been different. They are attached together, but there is something tender about their exchanges, something sweet. He treats her differently. He is so gentle and patient with her.

Everyone is talking about Ana and Christian. They've never seen Christian Grey like this.

I need to stop them. They're kissing slow, and kind of sensually. It is getting me hot and bothered.

"Hey," I yell at them, "Love birds, get off each other." Ana and Christian separate, looking all love eyed and happy. "Ana…. We need to go. We're tutoring…."

"Do you have to leave?" Christian asks her, sounding like a whipped puppy dog, "I wanted to drive you home…. My parents aren't going to be home this afternoon."

I suddenly see Anastasia clamp up. I want to laugh. Christian wants to have sex with Ana. Ana wants to have sex with Christian. Ana is terrified and has held off her attraction for one very long month of her life. She just needs to chill out and let it happen – she would be lucky to lose her virginity to Christian "I am sexiest thing since Justin Timberlake" Grey.

"We really need to go baby…." Ana says with a kiss, "I love you."

He smiles and I feel weak in the knees. Dear God, Ana needs to have sex with him. "I love you too baby…."

They kiss for the last time and finally extricate themselves from each other. I hold onto her arm and squeeze her hand.

"Just sleep with him…."

"I want to," she tells me, "Dear God, I want to so bad…."

"What is stopping you?"

"Terror…. Complete and utter terror."

"Why are you so afraid?" I ask her as she finally opens her locker.

"AIDS, STDS, Teen Pregnancy, I don't know where to put it…."

My jaw drops, "You don't know where to put it?"

Her head drops, "I've never done this before. I'm scared. I never thought I'd find someone like him…. Someone who I wanted to do this with."

I'm about to talk reason into her when I see people begin to run. Ana turns around and suddenly there is screaming. The screaming gets louder and I hear Ana's voice across the lawn.

"Ana….. it's Christian …..and Dean."

Without a second thought, we race across the lawn, following the sounds of screaming. We see the group of people crowding around the fight and Ana pushes through. The crowd recognizes her, and they allow her through easily. I follow behind and try to get a good look of what is going on. Christian is on top of Dean and I see blood – lots of blood.

"Christian," Ana screams, "Christian stop…. Don't hurt him."

He can't hear her; I don't know how he could over the yelling from the crowd. It is so damn loud. "Yell louder Ana," I tell her.

"CHRISTIAN," She screams, "BABY…. STOP IT. PLEASE…. I LOVE YOU….. STOP. YOU DON'T NEED TO HURT ANYBODY…."

All of a sudden, Christian's arm drops. He stands up, turns around, and walks immediately into Ana's arms. Out of shock, she throws her arms around his back and he burrows his face into her neck. A principal walks over; shock fills his face as he looks at the scene in front of him and immediately helps Dean from up the ground.

I am in shock and I think Ana is too.

"I love you," he whispers into her neck, "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to let you down. He was just talking shit about you and I wouldn't let him."

"It's ok…. It's ok," she says soothingly.

"You just mean so much to me," he rambles, "You love me despite everything…. And I've never had that."

She rubs her hands up and down his back and she continues to hold him. We look at each other, and I see it in her eyes. They've both fallen too hard, and too fast and there is nothing that will stop what they have both gotten themselves into.

**Ana **

** "Are you ok?" Christian asks as he rolls over, "I didn't hurt you – did I?"**

I shake my head, "No…. that was good."

"You were nervous…. I could tell," he says with a confident smile.

I can't help but laugh. "Yeah…. That was my first time."

He smiles, "It's ok…. it was good right?"

I lean over to kiss him. "It was very good."

"Good…." He says, getting up, "My parents are going to be home from work any minute… I need to get you home."

"Christian…." I say, sitting up, "When did you lose your virginity?"

He freezes. "Why?"

"Well…. Your reputation and everything…. Its just made me curious as to when you first… you know."

He smiles sadly, "Baby… I don't want to bore you with the details."

"Just give me an age. Please." I don't know why this is bothering me so much. It makes sense that I should know his sexual history considering what I just let him do to me.

"God, you're lucky you're you…." He shakes his head, "Only you…. Ana…. I was fifteen."

My jaw drops. "Fifteen?"

He nods, "Yeah…. Now can we stop talking about it?"

"Who…. Who would do that at fifteen with you? That's just so young…."

He shakes his head, "No…. I am not going to tell you. I don't want to fill that sweet brain with disgusting information."

"Disgusting?" I ask, "That's an interesting choice of words."

He throws his T-Shirt down in defeat and sits next to me on the bed. "I don't want you to think I am disgusting…. I don't want you to think less of me."

"Why?" I ask, my voice surprisingly soft.

"You mean the world to me," he tells me, his sincerity shining through, "I can't ruin that."

"Why do I mean the world to you?" I ask him, "You always say I am your angel, but I don't really understand why."

He snorts, "Because baby…. when we're together…. I can just be. You don't judge me. You don't tell me I am wrong for thinking that way or wanting what I want out of life. The only expectation you have for me is that I am honest to you. I didn't grow up like you Ana…. I don't have that."

I take in a deep breath, trying to hold myself together. Mr. Non Talkative/Moody/Mysterious knows how to sweep me off my feet with his words.

"You love me without strings…. You're pure and perfect and you're just my damn angel Ana…."

I kiss his cheek lightly. "Ok… I see what you mean. I think."

He snorts, "This is going to sound bat shit crazy…. But have you ever felt someone's energy before." I burst into laughter and he looks completely embarrassed. "So much for letting me be myself around you."

"I'm sorry," I tell him honestly, "I wasn't expecting that to come out of your mouth. Please continue."

He shakes his head. "All I was meaning smart ass is that there is a feeling I get when good people are around. They don't suck the life out of you… am I making sense."

"Like my mother sucks the life right out of you…." I say, confirming his theory, "Or Dean…. Dean did that too."

"Exactly," Christian says, tensing at the sound of his name, "You don't ever suck the life right out of me…. Unless it's for good reasons."

I snicker and he caresses my face. I take in a deep breath, hoping he doesn't freak out when I press this question one more time.

"Baby, who'd you lose your virginity to at fifteen?"

He takes in a deep, calming breath. "Elena Lincoln."

My jaw drops. "Elena Lincoln?" He nods in confirmation. "Elena Lincoln…. As one of your Dad's business partners Elena Lincoln…. Elena Lincoln, your Mom's ex-best friend Elena Lincoln. Elena Lincoln…. Who was sent to jail for tax evasion?"

He shakes his head, "Not tax evasion."

My jaw drops for a second time. They fooled a whole community, everyone thought she was going to jail for tax fraud. I can't believe this – Christian was molested by an older woman.

"No," he says, shaking his head, "Don't go there."

"But she abused you…."

"It is over and done with…. I don't want that crap in your brain."

"Christian…."

"Christian!" we both hear downstairs, "Christian, where are you? You should be studying right now…."

"Fuck…. My mom is home," he hisses, "Get in the closet... Mia has gymnastics later… I can get you out when my Mom takes her."

My head is a blur as he leads me to his closet and I take a seat at the bottom. "I love you baby," is the last thing I remember him saying before he closes the door.

**Three Weeks Later **

"**Ana," I hear downstairs, "Where are you…. We need to talk."**

My mother opens my bedroom door, and she slowly walks in. I have been frozen in this spot for a while. I don't remember how long, but I know it must have been a considerable amount of time.

"Can you explain what I found in your bathroom?"

I didn't even try to hide it. What would be the point? How does anyone hide something like this?

"I had sex with my boyfriend…. And apparently the condom sucked and so now I am exactly nine months out of graduating high school and I am pregnant."

My mother slumps down and grasps my knee. I lean over on her shoulder and she kisses my forehead.

"Does he know?"

I snort, "You're lucky I left that pregnancy test out…. You're lucky we're having this conversation…. I am too shocked to speak right now."

"I don't blame you," Mom says with a nod, "Have you thought about your options?"

"I've barely thought at all…" I tell her, "But I don't know…. I guess I have a right to choose, but I don't know if I could go through with that. This thing is in me… I don't know if I could go through with getting rid of something that is a part of me."

"That's understandable," she whispers. I've always had a good relationship with my mom. We've always had an easy dialogue between us. She also had me when she was seventeen, so maybe that has something to do with it.

Shit. Am I turning into my mother?

"Have you thought about adoption?"

I shake my head, "I know Christian wouldn't agree to that."

"Ok…" she whispers, holding me tight, "It's going to be ok…. we'll get you through this. It's going to be fine."

I allow my Mom to hold me and take comfort in her strength. Three months - three months was all it took for Christian Grey to swing into my life, take over, and change it irrevocably.


	4. An Uncertain Future

**Chapter 4 – An uncertain future **

**Christian **

** I hold her hand as we listen to our parents argue downstairs. **I can't deal with them. Ana is already upset, and they aren't making this any better. I hate seeing her like this. I hate seeing my girl in pain.

"When are they going to stop," she whispers, trying to hold back a sob, "What are they even talking about down there?"

I shake my head, "Us, they're making decisions for us.…. I need to be down there. This is our life." I head for the door, but she immediately grabs my arm.

"Don't leave me. Please."

I take in a deep breath and I try to control my temper. Ana needs me, and I need to be there for her. Finally – it hits me. The old fucks can argue and yell all they want, but this is between Ana and me. We will figure out our future without them.

"Baby…. come here," I request, pulling her to my chest, "Lay here and let's talk."

We cuddle on the couch in the TV room and I kiss her temple. "What do you want to do?" she asks me.

What do I want to do? When Ana told me that she is pregnant, a lot went through my head - fear, anger, even a little bit of excitement. Within the time since I have first started having sex, I've had several girls try to tell me they're pregnant. This is the first time that the thought of me knocking up a girl hasn't been completely abhorrent. I am freaked out, but I am not over the edge of anxiety quite yet.

"Your Dad is so set on Ivy League schools for you," she whispers, "I don't want to take that from you."

I shake my head, "The University of Washington is just fine. I want to be with you, I want to raise our kid together."

"What is that even going to look like?" she asks, "They're probably deciding where we're going to live with the baby…. deciding who gets to keep us."

"I'll get the money out of my savings for an apartment," I tell her, "I'm eighteen, you turn eighteen in a couple months…. I'll take care of all of this. Maybe even I can get my Dad to let me have my inheritance early…"

"We need jobs for something like that Christian…."

"I'll get one…. And you'll get one too," I tell her, "It will be fine – once College starts for both of us – that may cause problems, but your Mom is more rational then both of my parents combined. I know she'll help us. And if all else fails, I can guilt Grace Grey into anything."

"Christian," she says with a laugh.

"She won't want her grandchild to be living in filth. That would drive her crazy…. We'll be fine."

Ana takes in a deep calming breath, "With the baby…. I don't think college is the best option for me."

I feel my stomach drop. "What?"

She shakes her head, "It is too much money…. And with the baby coming…. I was thinking about cosmetology school."

"What the fuck is cosmetology school?"

She snickers at me, "Hair…. Manicures…. Pedicures…. I think I'd prefer to cut hair though."

Out of everything, this is the most horrifying. My girl deserves to go to college and study what she wants to study. She is being selfless for the baby, but I refuse to let her go through with this. She needs to go to college. I won't rest until she does.

"You're going to college…. End of."

The door opens and our parents step through. I see four different emotions, and I know this is going to be bad. My Dad looks angry, my mother looks upset and tearful, Ana's mom looks calm, and Ana's Dad looks like he wants to kick my ass… so business as usual.

"Alright," my Dad begins, "We've talked. Since obviously Ana wants to keep the baby and Christian wants to be with her every step of the way…. We have decided that Christian will stay with the Steele's during the week, but come back on the weekend. This will be how it is until Christian goes to Harvard."

"So that's it?" I snap, "That's how it is going to be – you aren't even going to ask us what we want?"

"Understand this son," he snaps right back at me, "You're a kid, you have nothing, and so if you want what is best for your child – you'll listen."

Ana puts her hand on my arm, "That's fine Mr. Grey…. Thank you."

He nods at Ana and I feel sick. I don't like this at all. "Your parents and I have come up with a financial agreement. Do you have any questions about this?"

I turn to Ana and she looks back at me. They may think they can take our choices away, but I am going to find a way. This is my family, and I will protect my family with everything I can. Carrick Grey and his fucking plans be damned.

"No," Ana says, shaking her head, "Thank you."

Dad nods and looks at me. "Can I speak with my son alone?"

The room agrees, and they begin filing out. Ana leaves a small kiss on my cheek before she leaves with her parents. When they're gone, Dad shuts the door.

"Listen to me clearly son…." He begins, anger filling his expression, "You have put me and your mother through shit these past six years. You're going to do as I ask, and if you do everything – you may have another chance at Harvard. You will do this, and you will get to Harvard – I refuse to see you throw your life away…"

"Don't ever associate Ana or my child with throwing my life away…."

"That's not what I meant…."

"I don't care what you meant," I snap at him, "Feel what you want to feel about this situation, but I refuse to let you insult them. You won't hurt her in anyway…. If you do –I swear to God."

He nods and walks for the door, "So it looks like we're on the same page…. Good…."

**Eight Years Later**

**Ana**

** I turn to look at the back seat and my heart breaks. **My sweet boy is fast asleep after a long day at school, and in a few minutes – he'll be gone. Co-parenting sucks. I've never enjoyed any of this. I love my son, and I don't want to lose him to his Dad for the long weekend. The rational side of me knows that he needs time with his Dad. Christian is a good Dad too, and I love their relationship. I just hate losing my son for any period of time.

Christian's car pulls up into the parking lot and I reluctantly get out of the car. I have appointments all afternoon, and Christian is taking Ted to Aspen for the weekend so we decided to meet at a convenient meeting point. I gently pull Ted out of his seat and he lies lazily over my back.

"Here…. I've got him," I hear Christian behind me. I turn around and I allow Ted to go to his Dad's waiting arms. Christian grins at me as he walks Ted to his car. Christian looks good, just like he always does. He never fails to turn me back into that sixteen year old girl.

He must have just left from work, and I assume they'll leave soon for Aspen. He's wearing his suit, but his tie is undone and his hair is a mess. I try not to over think his messy hair… I assume he was agitated with something today and not anything else. He has definitely aged gracefully, so much more then I could have ever anticipated. My poor son is destined to look just him one day.

Christian finishes in the backseat and I catch a look of her. Long brown hair, big brown eyes, naturally tanned skin. I hate how disgustingly beautiful Leighton Miller is, and how crazy Christian seems to be about her. To add to it, the bitch is nice. She's way too sweet, and I don't believe it for a second.

"So…. I've got all of Ted's ski stuff in the car," Christian tells me, knocking me out of my jealous rage. "I promise, he'll have some of the best ski instructors in the world."

I shake my head at him, "I am sure he'll be just fine. He deserves a fun weekend with you."

"And beginning of next week…. Which is Thanksgiving week."

"Hey…. He is going to be with me on Thanksgiving, I am not complaining."

He smiles, "Good… I am glad we can work this out."

I nod, "Good…. Me too."

We stand in complete silence, both wondering what to say next. It's moments like these that make me realize that I miss him. The chemistry is still present – it's been submerged underwater these last six years, but it's still there.

He's been with Leighton for two years, and it makes me wonder – does he think about me, or is it all about her now? I remember how insane he used to be about me…. Does she get that now? Does he want to marry her – he has only ever proposed to me. I don't want him to propose to her. Oh god, what if he takes this weekend to propose to her?

"How's Eddie?" Christian asks, forcing me out of my Leighton freak out. I almost laugh; I am the world's biggest hypocrite. I've been with Eddie for three years, but I know Christian isn't having the same freak outs about Eddie and I. How could he when he has five foot eleven inches of beautifully exotic female to deal with.

"Eddie is good," I tell him, "Eddie works a lot…."

Christian nods and coughs, "Good…. Well…. Ummm I guess we better go."

"Yeah…. I have an appointment to get to."

"Are you applying to schools?" he asks suddenly.

I shake my head, "We've been through this… I don't have the time."

"You don't need to spend the rest of your life at cutting people's hair," he admonishes me, "Let me pay for it if Eddie can't…."

"Don't talk about how much money my boyfriend makes…."

"Don't change the subject…. Don't try to make it sound like I'm insulting Eddie. I can help you. Let me help you."

I shake my head, "I don't need your help. I enjoy being a hair stylist."

"Ana…."

"I'm making good money and I have enough time for my son," I remind him. I can't remember how many times we've had this conversation over the years.

"You are brilliant and you could have a shot at a real job. I don't want money to be what stops you…."

"You and my son need to go to Aspen…. "

"Baby," I hear from the car, "We've gotta go…. oh hey Ana. It's good to see you."

I inwardly puke. Why is she so damn nice? "Leighton, it's good to see you too."

"Don't worry - we'll take good care of Ted this weekend."

"He is sleeping Leighton," I remind Loudy McLouderston, "Can you not?"

She clasps her mouth with embarrassment and nods, "Sorry…. Oh hey…. Can Serena fit me in next weekend? I've needed Serena for a while."

My salon is one of the best in the city, and of course Christian's girlfriend wanted to book with us. Serena volunteered to take her with the promise that she would always love me more. It's a running joke between Serena and me, but this does mean that I have to see Leighton and her nice, hot ass every three months. I hate it.

"I'll talk to her."

She grins, "Thanks Ana… you're the best." She rolls up the window and turns to make sure Teddy is still asleep.

I roll my eyes, and Christian shakes his head. "You hate her," he whispers in my ear.

"I don't hate her."

"I know you better than that…." He says as I shake my head. I will not admit this to him; I'd never admit that to him. "I'll say it first…. I don't like Eddie."

"You have no reason not to like Eddie…."

"You have no reason not to like Leighton…."

"Great," I huff, "We have no reason not to hate the other's significant others… now can I go? Mrs. Granakowski's hair won't set herself."

"Bye," he snaps, "Investigate Colleges."

"Make sure our son doesn't get hurt this weekend," I tell him as I take a seat at the driver's side of my car.

"Say hey to Eddie for me…."

I shake my head and start my car. "Goodbye." As I buckle my seat belt and check my mirrors, I realize Christian is still standing there.

I turn to look at him and we sit for a moment, gazing at each other. Electricity passes between us and I gather the will to get away. After a second, I finally reverse and back out of the parking lot.

** I wake up with a start, and see a figure across the room. **I move over to flip on the light and I finally realize the figure in question is Eddie. He is sitting in the corner with his head in his hands.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I sit up.

He looks up and gives me a tired smile. "Sorry…. I didn't mean to freak you out."

I would never describe Christian Grey as a small guy, but when he stands next to my current live-in boyfriend, he looks small. Everything about Eddie Joseph is big – everything. He is six foot seven, with big blue eyes, and dark hair. When Eddie and I go out in public, I never have to worry about my safety or some guy trying to hit on me. No one would ever dream of messing with Eddie – my man is a brick wall.

Of course, he isn't grimacing or terrifying in the least. He is as sweet and gentle as they come and he is so good with Ted. I would love to give him more kids; he is such a good father already.

"It's ok…. are you ok? Why aren't you in bed with me?" He immediatley moves across the bed and moves me into his strong chest. "Eddie…. Are you ok?"

"Ana," he breaths, "I love you, but I can't live like this anymore."

My hear t stops. What is he doing right now? Is he breaking up with me? He can't break up with me. I know this co-parenting has been tough on all of us. I can't lose him, he has been my rock.

"Eddie…."

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a box. My heart stops again for a completely different reason. He flips open the box and a diamond ring greets me. Eddie owns his own contracting business, so we aren't poor in the least, but I know this ring still must have cost him a lot.

"Ana, I love you. I don't want to be your live-in boyfriend anymore…. I hate that. I love you. Marry me…. Please be my wife."

I sit up in bed as my eyes continue to adjust. I look back up at Eddie and I lean in to kiss him.

"Yes…," I gulp, "Yes, I'll marry you." With a big smile, Eddie slips the ring on my finger and kisses me tenderly. In that moment, terror fills me.

How the hell am I going to tell Christian?

**A/N – Alright, before you bring out the pitch forks…. My goal is ALWAYS a HEA. So stop freaking out…. We'll all hold hands and get through this together. I don't own FSOG. **


	5. A Diary of a Crumbling Relationship (P1)

**A/N – Thank you for all the good comments and reviews for the last chapter. Thank you for sticking with me – I ALWAYS pull out the HEA. **

**This chapter, we will continue with the future and then we'll go back to Ana and Christian as eighteen year olds. **

**I don't own FSOG – Enjoy! **

**Chapter 5 – A Diary of a Crumbling Relationship (Part One) **

**Christian – Present Time**

** We pull into the drive at Ana and Eddie's and I turn to the crew behind me. **Leighton is passed out in the passenger seat while my boy is wide awake. I smile at my son.

"Ready to see Mommy?"

He nods, "I've missed her."

I smile back at him, "I'm sure she has missed you too." I lightly caress Leighton cheek. "Baby…. Leigh…."

Her eyes squint open and she turns to look at me. "Yeah?" she asks breathlessly.

"We're at Ana's… I'm going to help Ted in with his stuff."

She simply nods with a smile and lays her head back down. I get out and help Ted out of the car, and then we both go to the back to get his belongings. I try to help Ted with his suitcase, but he insists on pulling it himself. It's a small suitcase, but he seems very satisfied in being able to do this on his own….. Such an Ana move.

"Dad, can I ask you a question?" he asks as he begins rolling his little bag.

"Of course buddy."

"Do you love Leighton?"

I freeze, "Why do you ask that bud?"

"Well…. Mom loves Eddie and Eddie loves Mom, and I was wondering if you loved Leighton because Leighton definitely loves you."

"She does?" I ask, "Why do you say that…."

He rolls his eyes, "She gets that look in her eyes. It's the same look that Jessica Walker gets when we're in center time together. It's gross."

I laugh as I ruffle his hair, "Well, don't lead Jessica Walker on…."

"I keep telling her she is ugly, but she doesn't get the picture," he says as I laugh, "But Dad…. Can you do me a favor?"

I nod, "Of course."

"Can you warn me when you ask Leighton to marry you…. I had Eddie do the same thing before he asked Mom." I stop moving out of shock. What did my son just say to me?

Suddenly, the front door flies opens and Ana stands waiting for us. My heart stops when I see her, as it always does. Now, my heart is stopping for a whole different reason. I look down to her hand, but I don't find a ring. God, please tell me this isn't true.

"What's going on you guys?" Ana asks wearily.

"We need to talk," I tell her, insistently, "Now."

**"So where is the bastard?" I ask, picking up the bourbon that she offered me. **Ted is in his room, and typical for whenever I visit them – Eddie Jiotti is nowhere to be seen. It's like he knows I'm coming or something.

She rolls her eyes, "Working."

"Our son seems to think that he asked you to marry him…."

She takes in a deep breath, "He asked me while you were gone…. I was going to tell you now actually. Our boy has impeccable timing." She puts her hand in her jacket pocket and pulls out the ring. She carefully places it on her finger, and looks back up at me with a nervous expression.

"So you're marrying him."

She nods, "We've been together for three years and I've been friends with him longer than that…. he loves me…. He is good with our son. It's about time we made it official. It's not like you haven't been busy… you've been with Leighton for two of those years."

Leighton and I spent that first year in a not so conventional relationship. She was my submissive for a year before she convinced me to move our relationship into something more. Ana knows about my submissives, but doesn't pry too hard into the details.

"You're right," I say as I stand up, aggravation building, "Fine. Get married. Have a bunch of overgrown Italian children, and run off into the fucking sunset. See if I fucking care."

"Are you seriously going to do this…. Again. You have Leighton, why do you care about me… I don't understand why you're acting like this. I just wanted you to know because we share a son."

"You're right…. All we have together is our son. That's all we have," I snap, "Nothing else. There is nothing still between us so why do I fucking care?"

We stand across the room from each other, staring at each other intently. I feel the electricity surging between us, and I know I need to get out of this room before I get my ass in trouble. I lean over to kiss her on the cheek, but suddenly – she moves and our lips touch.

"Fuck," I hiss, extricating myself from her, "I've gotta go…."

I walk out of the room, wiping the evidence of her lips on mine. She is getting married – fine by me. She loves him, so she gets to have him. Forget that I chose Leighton to be my submissive because she looked like Ana. Forget that I spent that first year with Leighton, missing everything about Ana and wanting her to come back to me. Forget that I am still fucking in love with her.

I stop in my tracks when I see Eddie walking towards the house. We both stand, and stare at each other. Eddie Jiotti is a tall guy, and whenever we are thrown together – I try not to let him use his height as an advantage. He hates me, he loves to try to intimidate me, and I very often enjoy playing his stupid fucking little mind games.

"What are you doing at my house?" Eddie barks.

I sneer at the bastard, "Just dropping off my son."

He nods, "Did you guys have a good time, or did you spend the whole time attached to Leggy McLeggerson."

"Fuck you," I snap, "I spend plenty of time with my son, you condescending bastard."

"I care about my future Step-Son, Grey," he says, walking closer, "And I care about his mother – you can't blame me for that."

I shake my head, "I guess not. But make sure you stick that ring to her finger with permanent glue…. She enjoys taking it off and leaving for the opposite coast."

"From what I hear, you're just as responsible for that as she is…."

I shake my head, and walk for my car. I won't engage with the bastard – he loves getting into fights with me. I get in to my car and Leighton is already wide awake.

"That took long," she says, grabbing for my knee, "Everything ok?"

"Uh-huh," I nod, "I hope you're awake because when we get home – we're going to play."

A smile crosses her face. "Really? We haven't played in a while…"

I lean over to kiss her soft lips. "Exactly so get ready baby…. I'm going to ride that sweet ass hard tonight." I pull out of Ana's driveway with my girl wrapped around me. Fuck Ana, tonight – Leighton and I will play.

**Ana – The Past **

**I throw my hair up into a bun, and try to focus on the book in front of me**. Ted is finally asleep, and I finally am able to study. I got into the Catherine Hinds Institute in Boston this month, and have hit the ground running with classes. Christian still isn't pleased with the idea of me enrolling in Cosmetology school, he still thinks I need to enroll at Boston College, but he hasn't fought me on it. I want to be able to get my education quickly, and jump into a job that will help me support Ted quickly. I don't want to always depend on Christian's parents or my parents.

My phone rings across the room, and I quickly run to grab it. I am praying that Ted doesn't wake up. It took me forever to get him to bed.

"Hello…."

"Hey baby," Christian croons, "I'm still at the library, but I should be home soon."

"Good," I say, turning to Ted sleeping in his crib, "We'll be here."

He takes in a deep breath, "How did he do with Gail today?"

Christian pleaded with his mother to let us get extra help out here. They didn't want to do it, but after a lot of coercing from Christian and several threats to not attend Harvard at all, the Greys pitched in for a full time nanny.

"Good, I think," I tell him, "He's a baby and she is sweet and nice with big boobs – so I doubt he had a lot of arguments."

"That's my boy," Christian says with a chuckle.

"Christian," I hear a female voice across the line, "Do you have the notes from yesterday?"

"Who is that," I immediately snap.

"A girl from my class. I've gotta go, I'll see you tonight…. kiss Ted for me."

I stare at my phone in shock. The logical side of me knows that the girl my fiancé is studying with is just a girl from his class. The other, irrational portion of my brain is losing my shit. As I go to call Christian back, I receive a call from my mother.

"Hey Mom."

"Hey sweet girl…. How are you and my sweet boy?"

The familiarity of my mother's voice does me in, and I can't hold back. "I'm fine," I say, stifling my sob.

"Oh honey…. What's wrong?"

"It's nothing," I say, trying to shake off my tears.

"Ana….," she breathes, "Don't do that. Tell me what's wrong."

The tears fall down my face, and I feel like the world's biggest baby for what is about to come out of my mouth.

"I miss you…" I sob, "I just never envisioned having a baby without you being here…"

"Oh trust me," she replies, "I feel the exact same way."

"I just am getting really homesick and that's ridiculous because I am eighteen with a fiancé and a baby and I am not a thirteen year old at sleep away camp…"

"Hey," Mom interjects, "I don't think there is anything wrong with you missing home. You've never been away before and Boston is a strange city – on top of that, you have a new born, you're in a new school, and you have a fiancé. You've had to grow up too fast for my liking."

I take in a deep breath, "I'm already stressed with school…. And with the baby…. and Christian is always gone."

"Well, Harvard isn't easy," she says, "It doesn't surprise me that he is always gone. He is studying and doing what Harvard students do."

"So I am just being silly," I ask, "Christian is actually studying and he really isn't out to all hours of the night with other girls? Right, Mom?"

She laughs, "You can call him a lot of things, but a cheater would never be one of them. He is smitten with you and that little boy. He would have cut my hands off if I tried to keep you both in Seattle. He was definitely determined."

I take in a deep reassuring breath. He loves me; we're both just really busy with school right now. That is all this is. We are going to be just fine.

**Two Months Later **

** Ana **

"**ANA!" I hear a voice screaming outside my apartment, "ANA! LET ME IN."**

I bolt out of bed, and walk for the window. I look outside to see Christian on the first floor porch of our apartment building. He is stumbling and trying to open the door. He obviously doesn't have his key or is too drunk to remember he has one. I call his cell phone, hoping and praying he shuts up. I just put Ted down to bed, and I don't want his own father waking him up.

"Hey beautiful," he chirps as he answers his phone.

"Do not make any more noise - you will wake up our son."

"Oh shit, sorry baby," he rambles, "I'll try to be quiet."

"Are you drunk?"

"No." He always lies when he drinks. I shake my head, and throw on a pair of boots and throw on a jacket; October in Boston Massachusetts is colder than hell. I check the babies' room to see that his father's rant didn't wake up my sleeping little boy. I shake my head and walk to the front door.

I move quickly down the stair case and find Christian leaning against the side entryway of the apartment building. "You know you could get in trouble if a cop stops you," I tell him as he wraps an arm around my back.

"I know, but don't worry baby – I'm fine…"

He leans on me as I lead him up the stairs. "No you aren't fine, Christian," I scold, "We have a son…. I don't want you going to jail over something stupid. Where were you anyway, I thought you had class tonight?"

"I got invited to a party afterwards," he mumbles as I open the door to our apartment, "I just thought I'd check it out for a sec."

"You thought you'd check it out for a sec?" I snap as he collapses on the couch, "You didn't think to call me and tell me you were running off?"

"I was just going to go for a second…." He reaffirms, "And then…." He looks up at me, and then back down. He looks to Ted's bedroom, and then back at me.

"What is it?"

"I'll get in touch with a counselor… It's never going to happen again," he blurts out, "I acted stupid and I'm sorry." My heart stops. He told me a while back that in high school he was in constant contact with a Cocaine dealer, but he said he was done with that shit. He said he was over it.

"Did you….?" I ask anxiously.

He nods, "I stayed at the party until it wore off…. And then well…. I got caught up in the other shit they were doing."

"Christian…."

"I am fine, Ana," he tells me as he tries to stand up, "I have this under control. It was one time. I will call a fucking counselor and all will be well. Don't worry." He kisses me on the forehead and begins to walk off.

"Just call me next time…. ok? And don't fucking do coke again Christian – I mean it. That is what got your mother."

He turns around. "I know that's what got my mother. I told you I am calling a fucking counselor. We have a son, I get that …. I am not some fucking messed up coke head."

I walk over, grab the sides of his face, and look him intently into his eyes. "I'm sorry. Call a counselor tomorrow. You'll be fine. I love you."

He leans over to kiss me, and then eventually stumbles off to our room. I take in a deep, calming breath. I am at a loss after what Christian just shared with me. What the hell am I going to do?


	6. A Diary of a Crumbling Relationship (P2)

**A/N – Well, it's about that time where I have a guest reviewer cross a line. I am just going to say this once and then move on. I know people are going to have emotional responses to this story so this needs to be said. People who have followed me, you know you're in for a wild ride and that I love HEA with Ana and Christian – That is ALWAYS my goal. I am expecting emotional responses, but there is a line you don't cross. I know it's easy to sit behind a computer and say whatever shit you want to say because there is no retribution for your shitty actions, but seriously – I'm a human being, I assume you're a human being with some type of feelings and karma is a bitch. I hope for your sake that you don't say shit like that to people in person because I wouldn't want you to get your ass kicked or anything. Anyone else, keep this in mind if you decide to get a little crazy. I'm generally a nice person (if you don't cross me) so if you'd like to discuss anything about my story – I am an open book. I'll definitely speak in detail about it – I enjoy a healthy discussion. Ok, that's it. I'm done. **

**I don't own FSOG. Thank you for your reviews from the last chapter (minus 1). With Christian's 18 year old self, I want to channel the "wild and out of control" teen that was talked about in the books. Since Elena went to jail early in their relationship - I want to explore what would happen WITHOUT her direct influence because she's the worst. Alright, on to the story….. **

**Chapter 6 – Diary of a Crumbling Relationship (Part 2)**

**One year after they move to Boston **

**Ana**

** Why does this always happen? **Life has just started to calm down. Christian has been getting the help he needs (at least I thought he has), we both have settled into a good rhythm of life and school, and Ted is getting bigger and happier by the day. Life has been so good recently, and now I don't know what to do.

Tomorrow, Ted and I will be headed to Seattle for Kate's Wedding and we'll be there to see my family for a week. With Cosmetology school and dealing with a growing one year old son, I haven't been home since we moved to Boston. Christian has expressed repeatedly that he doesn't want to come with us to Kate's Wedding. With the new fall semester is starting next week, he wants time to prepare. He also definitely doesn't want to see his parents whatsoever. Now, I am insisting he comes back with us because I am not leaving him at home now. He needs to come home with us this week, or I am done.

Ted begins to fidget in my lap so I decide to let him down. He toddles across the floor, turns to look at me, and gives me the sweetest smile. He is looking more like his father every day, and with this new revelation crashing down on us – the thought breaks my heart.

Christian walks in minutes later surprisingly happy. I am still tense and anxious and I have no idea how to start this conversation. He leans down to pick up Ted, and he walks over to kiss me on the temple.

"Hey guys…. ," he says, taking a seat next to me, "Are you sure you want to leave me tomorrow?"

"Actually….," I begin bravely, "You're coming with me."

He stops and his eye brows rise with humor. "I told you I don't want to go home. I can't deal with my parents right now."

"Go into our bedroom and see what is lying on our bed," I instruct, "And then try to tell me that I am not going to force you on that plane tomorrow."

He looks at me with confusion. "Ana….?"

"Give me the baby before you walk in there…."

He kisses Ted on the forehead before he hands him over to me. He walks to our bedroom, and I sit in silence as I wait. He has to know that I found a stash of cocaine in the back of his side of the closet. Of all places to hide your drugs, the closet you share with your significant other is the absolute worst place to hide it. I'm surprised that Harvard hasn't taught him better than that.

He walks back through the apartment with a trash bag in his hand. "Don't move," he says to me in warning, "We're talking about this when I get back."

I wait for him, nervous and confused as hell. After several nerve wracking minutes, he walks back inside and closes the door quietly. He looks nervous, and he should be rightfully nervous.

"It's not what it looks like…."

I laugh, "It's not what it looks like? So tell me what I am supposed to be seeing right now?

He shakes his head and reclaims his seat across from me. "It was extra…. Left over… I never threw it out….. I honestly didn't realize it was still in there. I'm clean, Ana and no the extra cocaine is gone."

I scoff, "Are you kidding me? How do you not realize it's still in there? It's freaking cocaine – not that old pair of shoes that you never wear. I thought you were getting help…. Have you been lying to me this entire time?"

"No," he breaths angrily.

"Then why did I find cocaine in your closet… "

"I just told you why," he snaps back, "And I don't like being doubted." I don't want Ted in the kitchen while we're fighting so I decide to take him to his play pen in the living room. I'll still be able to watch him from the kitchen and that's my only option right now. My small timeout has given Christian a moment to regain his composure and I silently pray that this conversation won't end catastrophically. Once I know that Ted is occupied, I walk back into the kitchen.

"Well too bad because I'm pissed and I am re-thinking everything that has happened over the last month…."I yell, "I'm pissed that drugs were in our apartment because our son lives here, and I'm pissed that you've fucking lied to me."

"I didn't do a complete sweep after the first time….."

"It's been months," I say shaking my head, "You're lying."

"Baby, I haven't touched that shit in months…. Like I said." He looks anxious, but also like he could combust at any second.

It's in this moment that I have to make a decision. Right now, I am in "mother bear" defense mode. My son's life is my driving purpose right now. I don't want him around this. I don't want this coming up every few months just when I think Christian has his problems under control. I need to protect Ted at all costs. If this were just me, I might wait and see if Christian gets his act together for a second time, but I just can't do that now.

"You have a choice," I begin calmly, "You can either come back to Seattle with me, check yourself into rehab or I am done."

"What?" he breathes.

"Because I'm taking Ted and I am going home for good…." I tell him, trying to not break down as I talk, "I'm not doing this. I'm not going to let this become a pattern."

"So that's it," he snaps, "You're just going to throw us away because there was cocaine my closet."

"No," I say shaking my head, "I want you to nip this before it becomes a pattern. I can't watch you hurt yourself and I can't do this when I have our son to think about."

"I don't need rehab," he says adamantly, "I keep telling you that what you found…."

"Look me in the eye," I interrupt sharply, "And tell me that you don't need rehab and that you're one hundred percent. Look me in the eye and tell me that I am overreacting."

His silence tells me everything. I leave the kitchen and quickly walk over to grab Ted from his play pen. He looks sleepy, and I know its nap time for my baby boy. Christian follows me, still silent as I move to lay Ted down for his afternoon nap.

It doesn't take long for Ted to go down, and once I know he is content, I move to our bedroom. Christian sits on the bed, rubbing his eyes as we sit in silence. I want him to come with me to Seattle. I want him to go to rehab, and I want him to exorcise some of these demons that have plagued him for years.

"Baby…." I plead, "Come home with me."

"Seattle is like a black hole for me. I fucking hate everything about Seattle," he says shaking his head, "I made so many fucking mistakes there…."

"You're still making them here…. You're turning Boston into that for me…."

He takes in a deep breath, "Don't leave me."

My heart breaks. "Don't leave me," I plead right back. He reaches for me and I let him pull me forward. I straddle his lap and he grabs firmly onto my behind. I grab onto his hair as I pull his mouth to mine. We kiss and I feel the plea on his lips.

He quickly pins me to the bed, and he traps me under his body. "Please Christian…. Come back to Seattle with me. Check into rehab…. We need to do this together."

As he pries the clothes off my body, and sinks deeply into me – I pray that he listens. I don't think I'll be able to live without him, and it scares me that he doesn't want me anymore.

**As the plane pulls into Sea-Tac and I turn on my cell phone, a beep comes through my cell phone. **My stomach twists in pain. Christian didn't leave with me and Ted this morning. All I was given was a promise that he'd think about joining me later. I knew I sprung this on him quickly, so I understood the need to think about it.

I want to cry when I read the first words.

_I can't go home. I'm sorry baby, but I can't. I couldn't bring myself to do it. I'll miss you like fucking crazy, and I need you to come home to me soon. I'm sorry Ana, I just couldn't do it. _

Ted is getting antsy and I'm getting antsy myself. I want to curl up into a corner and cry with my son in my arms. I have to keep moving, I have to keep pushing forward. As Ted and I make our exit, I get a phone call from a friend.

"Hey," Macy yells through the phone, "Where are you guys?"

"We're on our way," I choke out in a sob, "I can't wait to see you."

"Oh honey….. what is it?" Macy asks empathetically.

I've missed Macy. Two minutes on the ground, I am already relieved to be home. The only thing missing is Christian. I just want Christian with me, and I sincerely hope that he was right about the severity of our situation all along.

**Present Time – Christian **

** I am wrapped around naked limbs and a naked chest. **I turn over to find Leighton's naked form sprawled across my bed. Leighton is a "sprawler" and her sleeping habits can be quite uncomfortable. I nudge her, and she stirs.

"Am I all over the place?" she asks breathlessly as she moves to her side.

"Yes," I say with a nod. I lean over to kiss her temple, "Good nap baby. Do you want to get dinner?"

"Delivery please…." She says sleepily, "I don't want to get dressed."

"Good…. Because I don't want you to get dressed either."

She laughs as she turns to grab her water bottle from the bedside table. "So… what did you talk to Ana about tonight," she asks, "You were in there for a while."

Of course she would ask me about this. I don't want to discuss it, but I'll need to eventually. Fuck.

"Eddie proposed and they're getting married," I ramble out.

Her brown eyes go wide and her jaw drops. "Engaged?"

I nod, "He asked her while we were in Aspen."

"Well this is great," she exclaims, "We're all moving on…. We can all move on now…."

I freeze, "What do you mean by that?"

She nods her head, "I just mean…. God, I don't want this to come out the wrong way."

"Leigh," I say, cupping her chin, "Just say it."

"You've spent these last couple of years making sure she is ok…. and making sure she is set and happy and I understand that because she is the mother of your kid, and there has never been such bad blood between you two that haven't wished her well. Now that she is getting married and has Eddie….. It may be our time."

"Our time?" I ask, comprehending her thoughts. She moves forward to straddle me, holding my face in such a way that I cannot help but look her in the eyes.

"I love you Christian," she says, her eyes sincere, "You mean the absolute world to me, and I want us to be happy. I want to marry you and give you more kids and make a life together. "

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to purpose," I mutter under my breath.

"This isn't a proposal," she giggles to herself, "It's a confession of love. So sue me…. I love you and I want to keep you as long as possible and I wanted you to be aware of my intentions…."

I nod, "You've never been one to not to be vocal of your emotions."

She laughs, "That's true. I blame the psychology degree. I'm happy for Ana and Eddie. She's a sweet girl and I've always understood why you loved her. I want the same happiness for us."

"You want us to get married?" I ask.

"There is no one else for me….. There won't ever be anyone else," she nods adamantly, "But God, I don't want to corner you. Do this when you think the time is right. I don't want to be one of those girls…."

As she pins me down to our bed, one question keeps circling through my mind.

_Do I want to marry her? _

I'm not sure if I'll like the answer to that question.

**A/N – Ok, 2 things before you review – 1) I am just going to be honest - part three will better explain/wrap up part two. I know you're going to be mad and angry and confused about several things from this chapter…. That is coming in part three and I should have that out by the weekend. And 2) don't get mad about the up close and personal Leighton/Christian time…. It's going to happen again because I want to depict what attracted Christian to her. So we're all just going to have to put on our big girl panties and deal with it. Lol. THANKS FOR READING **


	7. A Diary of a Crumbling Relationship (P3)

**Chapter 7 – Diary of a Crumbling Relationship Part 3**

**Ana **

** "Seriously Ana, what is wrong with you tonight?" Macy laughs as she hands me a drink, "Come on…. Ted is with your parents for the night – when was the last time you had the opportunity to go out and just relax?" **

"Do I look like I am not having a good time?" I ask as I take a sip of my diet coke.

"You look exhausted…. Have you done nothing but work and school and raise that precious baby boy?" she asks.

"And deal with my boyfriend's cocaine addiction;" I add as my shoulders slump, "I don't know what to do Mace…. I love him, but I can't continue to watch him flush his life down the tubes. I can't sit by and watch him pick drugs over Ted. I just can't."

"Leaving was a good thing," Macy says with a confident nod, "It gets you out of there and gives you some perspective. When you're in the bubble of your life, you see things one way."

I nod as I take another drink, "When are Kate and the rest of the bridesmaids getting here?"

"Soon I hope…." Macy laughs, "You know my sister; she is never on time for anything. She'll be late to walk down the aisle."

Kate is three years older than her sister Macy, but the three of us are a tight knit group. The only time we have ever really separated was when Kate went off to college. Even then, when I needed a baby shower and words of love and encouragement during my time as a pregnant high school student – Kate was there for me. Macy and Kate are like the sisters I never had. Macy will be Maid of Honor tomorrow during Kate's wedding and I will be one of ten bride's maids.

I hear a loud ruckus at the door and Macy and I turn our heads to see what the commotion is all about. Kate's bright blonde hair and smiling face walks through the bar and I shake my head with laughter. Kate Kavanagh always loves to make a scene. Followed behind Kate is her husband to be and who I assume to be three of Gavin's gorgeous friends.

"Yeah," Kate laughs, "My girls are here…."

"Where are the rest of the girls?" Macy asks, looking around, "All I see is men."

"I just wanted to officially introduce Gavin to Ana," she says as she wraps her arms around me, "ANA! I've missed you…. Where is my precious little ring bearer?"

I laugh, "He is with my parents…."

"I want to see my favorite little man…. I'm so excited you both are here." I try to offer up a smile, but happiness isn't a feeling I am able to conjure right now.

"This is Gavin," Kate says, introducing me to her very sexy husband to be, "And these are his friends – James, David, and Eddie."

I shake each of their hands and they all three smile at me. All three men are tall and attractive, and I feel like a midget next to their heights. "They all work with Gavin at his construction company, but Eddie here is looking to branch out and start his own company," Kate informs me, "But thank God he is helping run the company while we honeymoon…. He's not leaving me yet."

"How nice of you," I nod at who I assume to be Eddie.

He shrugs, "I actually just got roped into doing it. Kate is quite persuasive." He smiles at me, and I feel blush quickly fill my face. Kate immediately shoos them away.

"We're done here. Girl's night. Bye boys." The men leave and Kate turns to me with another hug. "I've missed you Steele….. how is Boston?"

Macy shakes her head adamantly at her sister and Kate's face changes. "I don't want to talk about Boston, and I don't want to talk about Christian."

Kate nods, "Then we won't talk about Christian…. We'll eat dinner, we're going to go back to my apartment and lose are fucking minds. You're due to act like a nineteen year old. The other bridesmaids will join us and we'll all let loose."

That's the best offer I have received in a while.

**"Are you sure you guys are ok?" I ask, trying to sound like I'm not completely shitfaced. **

"Yes," My Mom laughs, "Are you kidding me…. I have spent the entire night with the grandson I haven't seen in a year. I am on cloud nine. Ana, please – continue to enjoy your time and drink like a fish."

My jaw drops, "What?"

"I know you've been drinking and honestly, you deserve it. I don't care if you're legally nineteen…. In my mind, you're twenty five."

I take in deep breath, trying to hold back tears. Everyone is so understanding and wants me to have fun and enjoy myself tonight – what the hell? Even my mom is telling me it is ok to break the law while she takes care of my son.

"Thank you Mom."

"Go have fun. I love you."

"I love you too Mom."

Macy takes a seat next to me and clasps onto my shoulders. "How's the baby?"

"He's good," I sniff, "Mom is absolutely thrilled to have time with him tonight."

Tonight has been everything that Kate promised it would be. After dinner, the rest of the bridesmaids came over with too much alcohol. We've all gotten ourselves drunk to a ridiculous amount, and have danced around Kate's apartment like psycho paths.

"I bet she's missed him," Macy says with a knowing smile, "I bet she'll hate when you guys go back."

I shake my head, throwing out an idea I have had in my head since I landed in Seattle. "I don't think I'm going back."

"What?" she asks, "What do you mean you aren't going back? What about school? What about Christian?"

I laugh sadly. As soon as I got off the plane, My Mom has done nothing but throw brochures in my face for schools in town. Actually, she's already talked to one and they'll accept me immediately without my education being interrupted.

"My Mom talked with a cosmetology school in town. My Dad is willing to pay."

"Wow, you've really thought about this," Macy gasped.

I want to laugh. "As soon as I walked into my door…. My Mom was throwing her information about Cosmetology schools in my face, begging me to consider staying. I thought about staying when I left Boston originally, but I didn't think I'd be able to make it a reality."

"Does she know about Christian's drug issues?"

I shake my head, "No. They know we've been having issues, they just don't know what."

She rubs my back, "What are you going to do?"

I feel the tears threaten. "I love him. I love him so fucking much, and I don't want to leave him."

"I know you do, but…. Has he left you with much a choice? You love him, but you love that baby boy more…."

I take in a deep breath, "He didn't even come with me to check himself into rehab. He couldn't even do that for me and his son…."

Macy squeezes me tight and I know what I have to do. I need to call him, and I need to call him now. "Maybe you can wait to do this when you haven't been drinking so much," Macy offers as I shake my head.

"I haven't had the guts to do this in months and I should have done this long ago. I finally have the guts…. I'm doing this."

I walk over to a quiet room and begin to dial. I feel like I am about to have a full-fledged panic attack. I sit quietly as the phone rings, and shake nervously as he picks up on the third ring.

"God, I've been waiting for this call."

"Hi," I reply back.

"Hi, you ok? What are you doing up so late?"

"Kate is having a pre-wedding party tonight," I tell him, still shaking, "Mom has Ted."

"Have you been drinking?" he asks, humor evident in his tone.

"A little," I tell him honestly.

"Well good…. You deserve a night. You're the best Mom and you should get a night like this once in a while…. I'm a prick for not letting you go out more often."

Why does he have to be so sweet and sexy when I am trying to give him another ultimatum? I love him and I miss him so much. I wish he was here right now, attempting to have sex with me on Kate's bed without her knowing and not back in Boston doing God knows what.

"I'm staying Christian," I blurt out, "I'm staying with Ted. We aren't coming back."

His end is quiet, and I hear him stirring in the background. "No."

"Christian, I can't keep living like this. I am stressed all the time. I live in fear of you going back to cocaine all the time. I miss my family, I miss my friends…."

"I love you," he chokes out, "Please don't do this."

"Come back to Seattle Christian…. Come back and check yourself into rehab. California has some of the best in the country. Please."

"Ana," he sobs, "You know I can't do that…."

Tears are falling down my face, "You can't do this? You can't do this for me and you can't do this for us? I love you, and I'll always love you but fuck…. That little boy means more to me and I cannot believe he doesn't mean more to you too…."

"He does…."

"THEN COME HOME," I scream at him, "COME HOME AND WE CAN FIGURE THIS OUT." I hear the music turn off, and I hear Christian's breathing escalate on the other end.

"I can't…." he answers softly.

"Then I can't," I sob back, "I'm done. I'll figure out a way to get mine and Ted's stuff moved back to Seattle."

"Ana…. Wait," I hear him scream as I hang up the phone and throw it across Kate's bedroom. I fall to the ground and let my grief overtake me.

Through my sobbing, I feel footsteps down the hall. I hear the door creak behind me and immediately I feel Macy wrap her arms around me. I move to sob into her shoulder and she squeezes me tight. Everything comes out as I sob with Macy. The grief, the anger, the resentment, the stress, the love I have for him, and the disappointment that comes from being chosen second. It all comes out as I cry on my best friend's shoulder.

"You did the right thing," she murmurs into my hair, "It hurts because you love him, but you did the right thing. I'm so proud of you."

"I don't know…." I sob loudly.

"Come on… let's go get drunk…. You need this."

**Twenty Four Hours Later – Ana**

** Kate's reception might be one of the nicest parties I have ever attended. **Kate and Macy's parents are filthy rich so of course, Kate's wedding is nothing short of perfect. The ballroom is filled with lights and crystal, and dancing and laughter. Everyone is dressed as if they've stepped out of the Great Gatsby. I even look perfect in my long lavender bride's maids gown and my hair done up with a large purple flower. Being the mom of a one year old, I haven't felt this beautiful in a while.

Next to me, my mom is holding my sleeping son. I don't think I've held Ted once since we've arrived back home. My Mom has missed being grandma, and she was thrilled when I told her we'd be staying. That makes one of us. I hate the idea of leaving Christian, but I don't think I've been given much of a choice.

"Ok, Kate's friend Eddie keeps staring at you…." Mom informs me as she points over to Gavin's groomsmen, "He is yummy. Go dance with him."

"Mother, I just broke up with my fiancé, and the father of the little boy you're holding right now."

"It's just a dance…. Go dance with him," she says with exasperation, "He is adorable."

Since my mom keeps pointing in his direction, Eddie takes it upon himself to walk over to us. I shake my head at my Mom with disdain, and she just smiles innocently. Dear lord, I am going to hate living this close to her again.

"So….," Eddie's voice booms across the room, "I think it's about time I danced with the most beautiful woman in the room."

I roll my eyes, "Really? Are you really going to use such a corny line?"

He laughs, brushing his dark hair back. "Of course I am. Is it working?"

"One dance," I tell him standing up, "And you're keeping a considerable distance."

He grabs my hand, and I let him walk me to the dance floor. He tries to pull me close, but I pull back.

"I said distance…." I remind him.

He merely shrugs, "Sorry." We dance for a little bit, and make polite small talk. I'm not sure if I am enjoying this dance, considering how I was forced into it by my mother. "You have a beautiful little boy Ana…."

I nod, "Thank you."

"Where is his father?"

"In Boston."

He shakes his head, "And not in Seattle with his girl and his little boy…. That doesn't seem right to me."

"Eddie, I am sure you're a nice person and you're about three feet taller than a normal person should be, but I will punch you in the face if you say another word about my son's father."

He smiles and nods, "Dually noted." Suddenly, I hear my phone ring across the hall. I leave Eddie's side immediately to answer it.

"Ana, wait," Eddie says as I make it to my table and shuffle through my purse. I ignore him, and pull out my cell phone as soon as the ringing stops.

"Shit," I hiss as I see Christian's name in my missed calls, "It's Christian." I try to call him back, but I receive no answer. He leaves me a voicemail, and I try to listen to it over the party going on around me.

"Ana…. I love you…." I hear him go in and out, "Please come back to me…. I'll do anything."

That's enough for me. I don't care about anything else right now; I need to work this out with him. If he'll do anything, then that means he'll do anything. I need to get my stuff from Boston anyway, so I can kill two birds with one stone. My Mom can watch her grandson, and I can work out my life with my son's father. I can do this, we can fix us. I kiss my Mom on the cheek and tell her my plans.

"I'm going back to Boston, Mom," I tell her as I get my purse, "We're going to fix this."

**Six Months Later – Christian**

** "So when Ana came back to the apartment, what did she see Christian? What did she find?" **

I shake my head at the bastard sitting across from me. "You know what she damn well found…I wouldn't be sitting here right now if she hadn't come back to Boston to get me."

"Tell me again," Mr. Shrink repeats, "Tell me what she found when she came back to your apartment?"

"She found me fucked up out of my mind," I snap at him, "She said I called her and left this message saying that I'd do anything to fix us, but I don't remember calling her…. "

He nods and writes something else in his legal pad. "Describe the scene in your apartment," he questions. I want to punch him in the fucking face, he know what happened at my apartment that night. He's just being a fucking dick right now.

"I was fucked up out of my mind. I had thrown a party…. People were naked and drugged up lying around my apartment…. There were women half naked…. I don't know how they got naked…. I sure as hell didn't get them naked."

"Did you have sexual relations with anyone at that party, Christian?"

I shake my head honestly, "I don't know." That is why I am fucking here. For Anastasia to walk into that shit, when I couldn't tell her honestly that I hadn't fucked another woman, was too devastating for me to bear. She hates me right now. She really fucking hates me. That's why I am here. That's why I moved back across the country, cut all ties with everything from my life in Boston, and checked myself into rehab. I have to get her back. I want my family back. I let this get way too far, and now I am paying dearly for it.

"So Anastasia walked into a cocaine induced orgy."

"Yes," I nod shamefully. When Anastasia broke up with me the night of Kate's bachelorette party, I lost all the control I thought I had left in me; all of it shot out of the fucking window. I went on a bender and in the process, I lost my mind. I am here to get my control, my wife, and my kid back.

"Well…. You've admitted what happened and that you have a problem…. That's really good Christian…. Really good."

"Listen," I say, running my hands through my hair, "My fiancée."

"Your ex-fiancee."

I want to punch him in the fucking face. "Anastasia is graduating from cosmetology school in a couple months in Seattle and they said in the orientation that I might be allowed a trip out if I am doing well and I get the go ahead from my shrink, and I want to see her graduate. Do you think you can make that happen for me? And fuck, I'd sell both of my legs to see my son."

The shrink shakes his head, "Let's just take this one step at a time, Mr. Grey. We'll see how you're doing in a couple of months."

**Four Months Later – Ana**

** I throw down my phone at my station and run my hands through my hair. **Christian is finally getting out of rehab at the end of next week, and he wants me and Ted to be there when he gets out. I don't know if I can see him. The time away from him has been cathartic. I've needed time to myself to think and get myself back on track. I finally graduated from cosmetology school, and scored a job with one of the best salons in Seattle. I finally feel settled, and Christian has his own special way of making me feel scattered.

"You ok?" Serena asks as she pats me on the back.

"Yeah, I'm good," I say as I stand.

"Well good… because you have a new client. He says he's a friend of yours. He's sexy. If you don't tap that, I will."

"A friend of mine?" I ask as I look to the front of the salon. My jaw drops to the floor when I see who is waiting for me.

"Eddie?"

"Hey Ana…." He says from the front, tossing his long hair to the side, "I need help and you're the only one I know who cuts hair."

I point him to the chair, and he sits with a big smile. "What do you need?"

"I'm tired of looking like an 80's rock star…. I need it all off."

"All off?" I ask as I run a hand through his silky dark hair. I feel him jump, but settle back down instantly.

"Yeah," he says almost hoarsely, "I need something new… and fresh. Something different."

"Well," I say as I run a second hand through his hair, "You came to the right place…."

**A/N – Thanks for reading and thanks for sticking with me! We're getting closer to the present and I am pumped to get there! Please let me know what you think! You guys are the best! I don't own FSG. **


	8. A Rough Road Ahead

**A/N2 – Fun fact: The two shrinks named in this chapter are named after two mentors of mine. They'll probably never read this, but I still wanted to honor them. **

**Thanks for sticking with me! I don't own FSOG. **

**Chapter 8 – A Rough Road Ahead **

**Ana**

** "So," Dr. Meyer says as she sorts through her paperwork, "Today is the day…. You're going to bring Christian home from California." **

Dr. Meyer has been with me since Christian checked himself into rehab. My mom thought I could benefit from having a shrink, and I have really enjoyed having her. It's nice to be able to vent about anything I want. Especially after what happened with Christian and being somewhat of a single mom right now, I've really enjoyed seeing her weekly and getting to share my side of life to an impartial person.

"I am trying to figure out how to handle him."

A lot has happened since I found him at our apartment, drugged out of his mind. Even though I've had distance from the situation, Christian always has this way about him. That way will leave me a puddle of hormones and confusion. Now that Christian is finally coming home, I definitely need Dr. Meyer today.

"Are you still upset about what happened all those months ago?" Meyer asks, like she's reading my mind, "He did see the error of his ways and he has completed his treatments. There is something to be said for that."

"I know," I say with a nod, "But it was hard Meyer…. Walking into the apartment I shared with him for a year, thinking we would fix our relationship, seeing naked people scattered around…. God…."

"I know," she says with a nod, "I know. No one would blame you for continuing to separate yourself from him."

"Can you quit playing devil's advocate about this?" I snap at her, "Just tell me what to do."

"You know I can't do that," she laughs, "But…. You're going to have this no matter what you decide about Christian. If you decide to go back with him, you'll have your friends and family members and people you don't even know saying that you're taking back a cheater and a drug addict."

"I know about gossip…. I work in a salon."

"Exactly," she says with a laugh, "And if you don't take him back….. his family will be all over you about it."

My relationship with the Grey's hasn't been exactly happy since we've been back. I take Teddy over to their house on Tuesdays and Thursdays while I am working so Grace can watch him. I am glad that Ted can spend time with Christian's family, but it is obvious by their body language that they blame me for everything. Honestly, as long as they don't take it out on Ted – I'm good.

I haven't seen Christian at all. He tried to get time away from the facility for my graduation from Cosmetology school, but the facility wouldn't allow him to leave. I was honestly relieved; I wasn't sure what to say to him at the time. I still don't know what I am going to say to him.

I will be honest; I've avoided all communication with Christian. Even though Ted is nearly two, he still Skypes with his father whenever Christian is allowed time. Usually, Ted skypes with my mother or Grace sitting with him. Christian has asked for me every time that he Skypes with Ted and my mother, and every time – my mother lies for me. Grace also has traveled several times to California with Ted to see Christian. I have been invited every time and I decline every time. I may be a coward, but I just wasn't ready to see him. I'm not ready now, but I am definitely better off then I was when he was first admitted.

"What do you want, Ana…. What do you need to move forward?"

"I don't know what I want," I tell her, "I have a baby to think about…."

"Ted will be fine with whatever you chose because either way, he is going to see a hopefully healthy version of his father. There have been plenty of separated parents who have led healthy and happy lives."

"So you want me to continue to keep my distance…."

"I did not say that," she corrects me, "Last thing before I stop playing devil's advocate – do you still love him?"

I take in a deep breath and close my eyes. I clear my mind and steady my breathing. The next word out of my mouth will be the correct answer.

"Desperately," I sob, "That is what is hard about this entire shitty situation, Meyer. I still love him, but I don't know if we have a future anymore…."

We both stare at each other across the room and a knowing smirk crosses her lips. "So the devil's advocate tactic doesn't work…. Hmmmm?"

I laugh, "Oh you're good…."

"So why do you want to remain separated from Christian?" she asks, "And why haven't you vocalized this yet to me."

"Because when it runs in my head…. I sound like the biggest bitch in the world," I tell her honestly, "Because I have been battling for months because I hate the thought of letting him go."

She leans over and squeezes my knee, "Tell me more…."

**Christian **

** "So," Dr. Glen Robert says with a grin, "You're leaving us today. How are you feeling about everything?" **

I nod with a smile, "Good. Really good. Better than I thought I'd be…."

"This has nothing to do with a certain young lady and a strapping young lad coming to pick you up later today?"

I laugh, "That might have something to do with it."

"She has ignored you for most of this process," he reminds me, "She could still be angry. She has every right to be angry with you."

I nod compliantly; he has given me this lecture several times already. "I know," I tell him, "And yeah, knowing my girl – she's probably still pissed. But… she is coming to get me. She'll be here and she hasn't been here, and that tells me something. I'm choosing to stay hopeful about us."

"I just don't want you to get your hopes up, and I don't want you to relapse if she disappoints you. I know you're in love with her, but there is a chance she isn't going to take you back," he reminds me softly, "And you need to be ready for that possibility."

I take in a deep breath, "Can you give me the names of a few shrinks in Seattle?"

He nods knowingly, "Of course I can…."

**My bags are packed and I am waiting patiently in the front of the building. **The facility is giving Ana and Teddy a ride from the airport to the facility to pick me up. After they pick me up, we'll most likely eat lunch, do some shopping around Malibu, and then head to a hotel for the night. Our flight is scheduled for early in the morning. Ana booked two rooms and I try to not let that bother me. I get to see her and that is all that matters.

"I'd love to meet her," I hear Dr. Bob say from behind me, "From what you described, she seems like a lovely girl."

"Hands off," I warn him, "She's mine."

He only smiles, "Of course…."

Several other workers who I know very well assemble in the front of the building and I look around in shock. "What the fuck is this? A lifetime movie?"

Dr. Bob laughs, "Well, the female staff members love that little boy of yours…. And since you were such a pain when you got here – they want to see you not acting like a complete douche for once."

I shake my head. Dr. Bob's bed side manner could use some work – I hate that asshole. I smirk and he smirks back at me.

The van pulls up to the front and Ana immediately gets out of the front seat. My heart drops – she is wearing a blue sun dress and her chestnut brown hair is pulled back into a pony tail, exposing the neck that I love so much. Goddamn, she is lovely.

"How did someone like you score someone so pretty…." Bob snorts. I smack him in the arm and he chuckles.

When I look away from Bob, I see my son rushing for the door. A worker helps my little boy inside while his mother frantically chases after him.

"DADDY!" he squeals, running for me at full speed. He walks, he runs, he talks – I can't believe my boy is days away from turning two. It seems like just yesterday that Ana announced to me that she was pregnant with him.

I kneel down and he tumbles into my arms. "I missed you so much buddy."

"Miss you Daddy," he says back, and it takes everything in me not to lose it. I get to see him every day now – I will not forget the privilege. I really could have fucked up everything.

"Sorry," I hear her soft beautiful voice say, "He is too fast….he definitely wanted to see you."

I stand up with Ted in my arms, and look at the most beautiful sight for my sore eyes. I don't know how it's possible, but she has gotten even more gorgeous since I saw her last.

"Hi," is all I can muster.

"Hi," she replies back, smiling weakly.

"You must be Anastasia," Dr. Bob says from my side. I almost forgot the bastard is still here. "I have heard so much about you…. You really are very beautiful."

She blushes, "Thank you."

I smack him lightly, "Back off."

He grins and walks away. I walk closer to Ana and I stop in front of her – hoping it's the right mood. She meets me half way and wraps her arms gently around me, trying not to squeeze Ted in the process.

"I've missed you baby…." I whisper in her ear as she lightly sobs, "I've missed you so much. You're so damn beautiful that it effing hurts."

She giggles through her tears. "I missed you too," she says into my neck, "I'm glad you're better."

"I'm glad I'm better too."

We both pull back and gaze at each other, and she takes a deep breath. "Do you want to go somewhere to eat?"

I nod, "Absolutely."

**Ana settles Ted into his high chair at the first quiet restaurant we could find, and I try my best to help her feed him. **He is way too excited to even try to eat. I don't blame him, I'm excited too. Before I let my excitement get in the way of my judgment, I have a few questions for my baby Mama.

"So I am curious about something Ana," I begin.

She looks away from Ted, "What?"

"Why is this the first time I'm seeing you in nine months."

"I got a job," she blurts out, "I've been busy."

"My mom told me that your salon offered you time off. You've been avoiding me," I tell her, "The faster you admit that – the faster can move on."

She nods, "Ok yeah… I've been avoiding you, but do you blame me?"

I shake my head, "No…. I guess not."

She shakes her head, "Listen… after what happened. I decided that I needed to take a step back. We started hard and fast and we ended hard and fast, and I needed some time to clear my head and calm my life down. I'm glad you got help, I am glad that you came to rehab so your son could have his father…"

"I did this for you too," I tell her honestly, "I will love being able to have him in my life, but fuck Ana – I want you both. I know that's fucking greedy after what I did, but I need you too."

"Let's talk about something else please…." Ana says quietly, looking at her feet, "Anything else."

"Ana look at me," I ask her calmly. Coping mechanisms for anger that I worked on for a week in rehab are finally coming in handy today. I'm scared, I'm fucking terrified and all I want to do is lash out right now.

She looks up, and I see the pain in her eyes. "Tell me what you want to do now…. now that you're out. Do you want to go back to school?"

I hold back tears as I tell her about the plan I have been working on for over three weeks. "Dad is willing to help me," I say, in almost a whisper, "I have a business idea. Something huge. I want to make it worldwide….. fix companies with severe management and financial problems. I think it's going to be good – great even."

"That sounds great," Ana sobs, tears falling down her face, "I think that's perfect."

"Ana," I plead as she continues to sob lightly.

"Momma…. Wus wong?" Ted asks from across the table.

Ana smiles through her tears, "Nothing baby… Daddy is just telling me great news about his new business idea."

"Ana," I plead with her again, "You don't want…. You don't want us anymore…. Do you?"

Her reaction tells me everything. Full-fledged tears fall down her face, and I know she can't control them. I reach across the table, holding on to the hand that isn't wiping off tears.

"I'm so sorry…." She says through her crying, "I love you so much… but right now – I think I have to go it alone for a little while."

Before I can fight her, she gets up from the table. She cries hysterically as she runs for the bathroom. I want to march myself right back to the facility right now, and forget everything. The vile feeling of losing Ana for good stabs deep within my soul and I want to run off to scream my lungs out; I love her but right now her independence is more important to her than me and it hurts.

"Dadda….. Dadda. Where Momma go?"

I move over, picking my son out of his high chair, and holding him tight.

"You mind if it's just you and me buddy?" I ask him, "You and me against the world." He smiles and claps the sides of my face with his tiny hands. I take that as a yes.

** It's quiet. **Too fucking quiet in here. Ana is sleeping in the room attached to this one, probably sleeping like a fucking baby. I hate that she did this now. I hate that she took this trip to tell me that it's over. I hate her for that. She says she loves me, but decides to completely destroy me at the worst fucking time.

I turn over to and look at Ted next to me. I'm glad she let him sleep in here with me. She understands that I've missed time with him, and I need to make it up. Also, we could pry Ted away from me. I took some satisfaction in that, but then I felt like an asshole. Is this how it's going to be from now on? Competing for Ted with my ex-girlfriend? Fuck my life.

Suddenly, I hear footsteps and sniffles. I know it's her. She moves closer, and I know she is standing next to the bed. I look up at her as she stares down at me.

"Can we not be fucked up for one night?" she whispers, "One last night…."

I nod reluctantly, and she slides in next to me. She changed her hair, I know she has. I like it, I like it a lot. That must happen a lot when you work in a salon.

"I'm so sorry," she whispers, "I didn't want to do this now."

I take in a deep breath, inhaling her sweet scent, "There is never a good time to break up with someone."

She moves in closer, and I squeeze her tight. "Even when that person was your best friend…."

I kiss her forehead, but I don't say anything. "I love you…. You know that right?" I tell her after a minute.

"Ditto," she whispers, "Even if it doesn't seem like that right now."

"Go to bed baby…."

I hold her for the rest of the night, praying for some relief from the pain that lances through me. If I had just gotten help like she wanted originally, I may not be forced to live like this. Tomorrow is my first day without her, and the thought sends a knife through my heart.

I turn over, needing to see my baby boy. I gently touch his soft face as he sleeps in a ball next to us. He is half of her and half of me – I feel comfort fill me. Ted will be my focus. Ted will be where I pull my strength. I can do this. I can be strong. I'll move forward with my son as my main focus, and nothing else will get in my way. Even his mother….

**A/N2 – Ok, so put down your pitch forks. We needed this chapter to set the stage for what will happen in the future. Staring in Chapter 9, I am going to push us up in time a considerable amount (I still haven't figured out how much time yet but it will be a pretty substantial jump) but we'll definitely be moving on after this. Please stick with me – once you see my master plan you will either think I am crazy or love me or both – I'm honestly hoping for both lol. Please stay with me! Thanks! PLEASE PLEASE let me know what you think. If you need counseling, I am available – haha. **


	9. Eddie and Ana

**A/N – Ok friends – here is my plan. We have officially moved three years ahead in time. This chapter is solely about Eddie and Ana…. The next chapter will be about Christian and Leighton. Christian and Leighton's may even be two chapters – that situation is a bit more complex than Eddie and Ana. After we get through the stuff with the other people – then we'll move on to the good stuff! So just a warning for people who aren't especially fond of them with other people – this chapter (and the next couple) may not be your favorite. **

**I don't own FSOG. **

**Chapter 9 – Eddie and Ana **

**Ana – Three Years Later **

** "I have always wanted a fuck buddy," Serena says with a laugh, "I need sex…."**

We all laugh at Serena and she bites aggressively into her sandwich. Lunch time at the salon is an hour of peace and quiet, with the exception of Serena's raunchy stories and questions. I wouldn't want it any other way.

"Who here has actually done it?" Serena asks, "Had sex with a guy with no strings attached." Lauren, Talia, and Brooke all admit to it and I turn beet red.

"It looks like Ana has too," Josie says with a laugh.

Serena shakes her head, "Oh please…. We all know she hasn't touched a cock in three years."

The whole salon laughs as my jaw drops. "Excuse you…"

"That hot piece of ass Eddie Jiotti practically drools all over you every time he visits…. Which is ridiculous that he visits here at all because you two aren't boning," she says with a laugh, "But the man is obviously very into you, and you have done nothing about it for THREE fucking years?"

Allie shakes her head, "While Serena's delivery always sucks, I'd have to agree …. Eddie is a FINE and he is into you…. It's so obvious."

"Can I speak for once?" I laugh, "You jerks won't even let me speak for myself…."

Brooke nods, "Yes…. Let the poor girl defend herself."

I nod gratefully to Brooke, "So…. when me and my baby's Dad originally broke up…. There was still unresolved…. Issues."

"Sexual tension?" Serena asks.

"Yeah…. Exactly," I say with a nod, "That first year …. We sort of …. Had lots of "friends with benefits" sex."

Honestly, it wasn't easy completely breaking from him. He was still in my life because of Ted, and I was still heartbroken after our split. I hated the situation we were in, and he was damn near impossible to get over…. he still is. After about a month of not speaking, Christian came by the house to drop Ted off, and later when Ted went to bed we had lots and lots of sex.

We both have very busy lives. Back then (and still today), he was establishing his new company and I was busy with work at the salon. We missed each other, and we decided to take the complicated out of our encounters. We ended up having sex for almost a year until we both realized that it wasn't healthy for us to continue like that. He would always want more from me, and I still wanted to keep my independence.

Serena gasps, "I am in shock."

"That's why nothing happened with me and Eddie that year…. Eddie tried, but I was a little preoccupied with the ex."

"So what's with the next two years….," Serena asks, "You need to get back out there."

"I just don't know if I am ready for another relationship," I tell her honestly, "I wanted my full independence…. And I meant it. I am not going to lose one relationship…. The love of my life… just to jump in another bed."

"It's been two years," Serena reminds me, "I think you're good to have lots and lots and lots of sex with Eddie."

God bless Serena, she is my little sex maniac. She twists her long blonde hair into a bun and I shake my head. "He has been dating Celeste Fullerton for three weeks."

The girls all laugh. "Celeste Fullerton looks like a horse," Allie laughs, "You're a hell of a lot prettier than Celeste."

"Ana may be prettier," Brooke tells her, "But Celeste is a slut."

"Exactly," I tell them all, "I can't compete with her. I may have had a kid at seventeen, but I was in love with his father and a complete bookworm."

"You wouldn't be talking like this if you didn't have feelings for Eddie….," Serena fires back.

"Quit speaking for me Serena!"

"Dear God woman," Serena shakes her head, "Figure your shit out and then go after what you want. Quit waiting for life to pass you by…."

"Cool line," I laugh, "You wanna go work for Hallmark?"

"Oh my God," Talia says from the front desk, "Ana…. Celeste Fullerton is coming in at 2:30. She booked with you."

"That bitch did that on purpose," Josie laughs, "She has to know that you and Eddie are best friends… she isn't stupid."

Everyone turns to look at me. "Eddie and I are just friends…." I remind them softly, "Really good friends…. I'm not jealous of Mr. Ed."

Lauren pats me on the back, "If you want me to see her – I can do it…. I'd hate for her to walk out of here with blue hair."

"No," I huff, "I'll do it."

**Celeste Fullerton is a whore. **Ten minutes of her in my chair, and I can't deny it. The bitch is a certified whore. I think the girls were right; she is doing this on purpose. I hold backbecause if I don't, I might kill her before this appointment is over.

"You're so lucky you have him as a friend," Celeste smiles as I make the first cut, "He's such a good guy."

"He is," I say with a nod. _Focus on cutting the bitch's hair…. Focus on cutting her hair._

"I want to go darker…. I think he likes girls with darker hair," she says, examining her blonde locks. I turn to look at Brooke and she nods her head knowingly. It might be better if Brooke makes her dye. I'm two steps away from turning her perfect blonde hair bright green.

I nod, "I wouldn't know."

She looks at me and smiles. I am not sure if the smile is malicious or if she has gas. "Just between you and me, but he is a beast in the sack. Just thinking about him and me the other night …."

Eddie slept with Celeste Fullerton? Seriously? I am slowly losing respect for my so called friend.

"That's nice…."

"And seriously Ana…. His dick…"

"You know what," Brooke says as she rounds the corner, "I had a client cancel and your son's Pre-K called…. I think it's important."

Ted isn't at Pre-K today; he is with his father for the rest of the week. I don't care – I need to go. I am so very thankful for Brooke's interference, I don't know if I'd be able to make it through this otherwise. I go immediately to the backroom, and sink into the nearest chair.

I cannot believe he already slept with her. Sure, I want him to have relationships with women, we're friends and friends wish the best for each other. But fucking hell - he can do a lot better than Celeste Fullerton. He deserves a lot better than Celeste Fullerton.

We've been good friends for three years, and best friends for the last year and a half. He made his feelings known to me very soon after Christian and I broke up, but I just wasn't ready for anything serious. He has waited and waited, and I have watched him date while I've played the "best friend" role. I have dealt with several versions of Celeste Fullerton over the years and today might very well be my breaking point.

Serena walks into the backroom and the words exit my lips before I have a chance to think about him.

"I think I might be in love with him Serena…. It is going to tear me apart to see him go out with Celeste tonight."

She takes a seat next to me and wraps her arm around my shoulders. "Then go get him…."

**Eddie always works until about 5:30 on Fridays so I know I have a chance of catching him before he leaves. **I've been to his many construction sites over the years so I generally know where I am going. I find his office trailer, and burst in without knocking.

"You slept with Celeste?" I announce loudly as I open the door. My jaw drops to the floor as I see five large men surrounding a round table with blue prints in the middle. The men stare at me in shock and I finally notice Eddie in the middle, shaking his head.

Eddie takes in a deep exasperated breath, "Ana…. My office looks like this one, but down three more trailers."

I look at the men, and then at Eddie. "I'm really sorry for interrupting," I tell them as I slowly move for the door.

"No, no," one of the other men says, "You stay…. We're leaving. Obviously you have a lot to discuss with the main man here." The men shake hands and all stare knowingly at Eddie. Shit, me and my big stupid mouth.

They eventually exit the room, and Eddie and I are left alone. "So…." he says with a smirk, "Explain to me why you barged into my place of business waving my sexual history in the air?"

"She was in the salon today…. Talking about your dick and how much she enjoyed your time in the sack…."

He stops and stares at me for a second. After a minute, he shakes his head and shuffles the paper on the desk. "She's lying," he says softly, "I never slept with her."

"You didn't?" I ask.

"No…. we were going to…." He begins before he stops himself.

"You were going to tonight?" I finish for him, "On the hot date she is getting ready for right now…."

He stops and meets my eye line. "Who cares if we have sex tonight? You and me are just friends… why are you freaking out about this? She isn't the first woman I've told you about…."

"I know…." I mumble out, "I was just…. I don't know…. I was just thinking…."

"Ana," he presses me, "You're mumbling…. You're nervous about something. You always mumble when you get nervous."

"I want to have sex with you," I blurt out and instantly turn red. Oh my god, did I actually just say that to him? "Oh shit. I mean…. I don't want you to have sex with other girls…. Just me. But I want you to be my boyfriend….. not just sex. There is a 98% chance I am in love with you and a 100% chance that the idea of you and Celeste Fullerton doing it will rip me to shreds…."

He is currently staring at me like I've grown a second head. I know this must be confusing for him, and he probably is thinking of the nicest way to turn me down. I lost my chance three years ago, there is no way he still wants me.

"You're great with my son, and you're definitely high on the list of some of the best friends I have ever had…. And I am pretty sure I'm in love with you." I am trying to redeem myself at this point. He must think I am certifiable.

He walks over to me, leans over, and very softly touches his lips to mine. He slowly moves his hands to the nape of my neck while my hands find my way to his hair. As our kissing intensifies, he throws the papers off the desk and hoists me up.

"No… not here," I tell him as I giggle, "I am not having any kind of sexual relations with you on a desk with men working outside…"

"So you mean this," he asks, holding me midair, "You're serious about us. Do you want to give us a go?"

"Do you?"

He laughs, "Are you fucking kidding me? I've wanted you since day one."

"So you don't want Celeste Fullerton…."

"Oh my god," he laughs, "That's like comparing Caviar to McDonalds…."

"You didn't sleep with her?"

He laughs, "Oh baby…. hell no." We kiss, and for the first time in three years, I feel like I'm home.

**Three Months Later **

**Ana **

** I feel like the Incredible Hulk is lying on top of me. **I turn around and lightly push my naked boyfriend off me. He grunts as he moves to the side. I snuggle comfortably into his side, and place my head in the crook of his neck.

"You fit perfectly beside me," he says sleepily.

"I know," I say as he holds me tighter, "You're so snuggly."

"Snuggly?" he asks with a chuckle, "I hope I'm not too snuggly or I need a different career…. A career that means I can be at the gym all the time."

"You don't need to be at the gym…. I'll work you hard," I say as I kiss his neck.

"How hard will you work me?" he asks as I blush. He laughs at my reaction, "I love when you talk dirty…. Or try to talk dirty. You're so proper…. It's fun to see you let loose."

"You're the only one I can be like that around," I say as I mindlessly run a finger across his abs.

"You watch where you move that finger or I'm going to get hard…."

"Oh, you always say that…." I laugh as he grabs my hand.

"I mean it baby," he says as he presses a kiss to my neck, "And your son is arriving soon." I freeze and he smiles sadly. "Are you going to tell him? You need to do it soon…."

"Ted probably was the one who told him about us," I remind him, "You can't keep a secret with that kid around…."

"But you'll tell him right?" Eddie asks as I sit up.

"Sure," I say as I lean over for a kiss.

I hear a car pull up my driveway and I quickly move to pull on some clothes. Christian is here, and so is my new live-in boyfriend. I don't know what Ted told Christian, so I need to be prepared for anything. Eddie is my future so it's about time Christian knew everything.

I quickly shuffle downstairs, and when I hit the bottom step, Christian's angry voice hits my ears.

"Anastasia…. Get outside now."

Eddie shakes his head as he follows me downstairs, "I'll grab Ted so you two can talk…"

We both walk outside, and when Christian sees us together, his face turns murderous. I lean down and give my son a hug and kiss, ignoring his angry father in the process.

"Hi Mommy," he says with a smile, "Daddy seems mad."

I nod, "He's not happy with Mommy right now, but that's ok. It happens. Go inside with Eddie."

"Wait just a damn second," he hisses, turning to Eddie, "I want you to be very aware that I have a security team that will do a background check on every little part of your damn life. Considering that I just found out this weekend that you're living with the mother of my kid – I will take every liberty in making sure my son is safe, and not around someone who is potentially dangerous."

He scoffs, "Oh come on Grey… I've been around for a long time. Even before we started seeing each other…."

Christian's scowls and I grab Ted's hand. "Excuse me while I take my baby boy inside…."

"No," Christian snaps at me, "You stay here. The Jolly Green Giant can watch our son while we talk…."

Eddie wants to say something, but I know he is holding back due to Ted's presence. He picks up his tiny suitcase and Ted dutifully follows Eddie inside. Once the back door is shut, Christian practically explodes.

"How long have you two been together?"

"A couple of months," I answer.

"And you didn't think to say ANYTHING to me," he hisses, his face in visible pain, "I have to hear about Mommy's new boyfriend from OUR son. What the fuck Ana?"

"I'm sorry…. I've just been waiting for a good opportunity," I admit.

He shakes his head, "So he's living with you… right?" I nod and he practically growls. "I don't like this…. I don't like it one bit."

I decide to hit right to his major fear. "Eddie isn't replacing you, Christian. Eddie isn't Ted's Dad…. You are. I would never try …"

"You better tell the ogre that," he snaps, pointing to my house, "He better understand his role in this. He is just the guy that you are currently fucking…. That's it."

Tears prick at my eyes. I feel like he just slapped me. Why is he being so mean and callous about this? I didn't do anything…. I am just trying to move on with my life.

"Fine," I sob, "I'll be sure to let him know."

His face drops, and I know he feels bad about his words. "Shit. Ana…. I'm…."

"No," I say, shaking my head, "Its' fine. I'll tell him. I'm sorry for not telling you sooner."

"Ana, don't…. I'm sorry. It's just…."

"I get it…," I say, trying to dry up my tears, "I don't need any explanations. Thank you for bringing him home safely. I'll have my Mom drive him to Escala next week."

I wanted to say more to him. I wanted to have an actual adult conversation with him, but I guess that's out of the question. I walk back inside and move to the kitchen window. Christian is still standing at his car, looking dejected from our conversation.

"Mommy," I hear at my feet.

I kneel down and kiss him on the forehead. "Did you have a good time with your Dad?"

He nods, "Daddy got a boat and he took me on it…."

"He did?" I ask as he shakes his head, "That's so great. You guys must have had the best time…."

"His boat is named the Anastasia," he says, trying to sound out a fascinating version of my name.

I laugh, "Your Dad named his boat after me?"

He shakes his head, "No Mom…. It isn't called the Mommy."

I laugh loudly, "Oh of course…. What was I thinking?"

"Mom….," Ted whispers as he looks around the room, "I don't think Dad likes Eddie."

I take in a deep breath, "Did you talk about Eddie a lot with your Dad this weekend?"

He nods adamantly, and I know the source of his anger. He doesn't like that his son spent most of his weekend talking about my boyfriend. I need to fix this.

"It's not that Daddy doesn't like Eddie…. It's that, your Dad prefers to talk about you and him when you guys are together. You don't get a lot of time with him…. So he wants to talk about you and all the fun things you could be doing…. Not Eddie or Mommy."

He nods, and I think he understands as much as he is able. "Ok Mommy." I kiss him on the forehead and squeeze him tight.

"I love you," he says into my cheek.

"I love you too baby boy…."


	10. Christian and Leighton

**A/N – Thank you all for bearing through the Eddie and Ana chapter…. Here is the Leighton and Christian chapter. Plans have changed…. We'll have one more chapter after this and then after that, we'll move straight to the future. Thank you for your patience – I wish I could sit and bust these out all day, but I can't do that. Thank you for your great reviews! Keep them coming! I want a HEA…. I just like the journey to be a bit crazy first (it's more fun this way ****) . **

**I don't own FSOG **

**Chapter 10 – Christian and Leighton **

**Christian **

** As I walk into my kitchen, I throw my jacket on the counter and take a seat. **I am mentally and physically beat. I had a great weekend on the boat with my son, but the Eddie and Ana issue has taken its toll. Ted could not stop talking about fucking great fucking Eddie is. If I didn't love my son so damn much, I would have jumped off the boat. I pull out a bottle of scotch, and fill up.

"Why so glum sugar plum?"

I jump and slam my fist to the counter as Mia walks into my kitchen. "Mia…. What the fuck?"

"I told you I was coming over…. Taylor let me in," she informs me as she pours herself a glass of orange juice, "We had this conversation. You said you were dropping Ted off at Ana's then you said we could do brunch afterwards…. I can't believe you forgot this."

I faintly remember that conversation. "I'm sorry Mia…. I'm not sure if I'm in the mood anymore."

"Not in the mood," Mia huffs, looking at me curiously, "What do you mean you're not in the mood? I planned my day around you."

"I'm just not…." I tell her, not wanting to go further with explanations.

She shakes her head, "Does this have ANYTHING to do with Ana's new boyfriend?"

"You knew they are together?" I ask with surprise.

"You didn't know they were together?" Mia asks with a laugh.

"He's been around…. I've seen the way he looks at her, but I never thought…." I take a deep breath, "I never thought she'd go through with it…. I ran a background check on the bastard and all, but I never thought…."

"You never thought you'd be replaced."

I shake my head, "Don't say it like that…."

"Do you feel replaced?"

I snort, "Let's see…. The woman I am still madly in love with is fucking some other guy, and my son thinks that asshole is the eighth wonder of the world…. What do you think?"

Mia shakes her head, "Ted still loves you. Ana has custody of him and sees him most of the time so Eddie is just another male that he looks up to. Ted won't think along the lines of - "I like this guy over my real Daddy"…. It's more, "he is here, and he likes to play with me"…. Ted is too sweet and has been raised too well to think any different. "

I have nothing to say to that. I hope Mia is right. I finish off my whiskey, "I'm not in the mood for brunch Mia."

She grabs my chin and kisses my cheek. "It's time Christian…. Get over her."

"I don't need a lecture Mia."

"Seriously Christian, I'm not joking about this," she chastises me, "You need to move on. It's time. After your little 'fuck buddy' stage with Ana…."

"You knew about that…."

"Please…. You both are terrible actors; we all knew you two were still seeing each other…," Mia laughs, "As I was saying…. When you guys finished your relationship for the final time…. you've been sitting. You've been waiting for her, and that's just not healthy. Obviously, she's not coming back. Obviously, she is moving on and you should be able to move on too…."

"Are you done?" I snap. I don't want to hear this right now.

She kisses me on the forehead, "You're a hot single Dad. Your milkshake will bring all the girls to the yard." I shake my head with exasperation; Mia always has such a way with words.

At my request, she leaves me on my own, and I pour myself another glass of whiskey. As I drink, I decide I need to get some work done. I can't sit here and dwell - it will drive me fucking nuts. I'll work and I'll forget everything that happened today. That's what I have done for the last three years. I use work as a way to forget about her and what we could have had together.

I walk to my office and begin shifting through the papers on my desk. My company is booming, and I could not be prouder by our progress. With the recent boom and expansion, I've been able to make necessary financial decisions for myself and my family. I hired a security team, and they keep my entire family, Anastasia included, safe from any possible threats. We're a young company, but we've had plenty of threats in our infancy. I bought the boat for Ted, knowing we'd be able to spend valuable father/son time together. Next time we go out, I plan on taking us fishing. I do need to consider re-naming it though, I feel like a douchebag over naming it the "Anastasia."

I file a few papers away, check a few emails, and then go back to more filing. As I file my last several papers, I stop in my tracks when I see a blue envelope sticking up in the back of my filing cabinet. I know this blue envelope well; I've read it a lot. I don't know why I kept it after all these years. Maybe it was sentimental, maybe it was out of guilt. Either way, I feel pulled to read it one more time.

I open the envelope and slide the plain card out if it's packaging. I pull in a deep breath and begin reading.

_Dear Christian,_

_I'm sorry we had to end this way, but I regret nothing. I know life has been hard on you (no one understands that but me), but I hope through our time together, you have gained the discipline you need to go where you need to go in life. _

_Once you hit eighteen, If you need any assistance getting on your feet and finding your way through the world of BDSM – call Dane (423731), he'll be able to give you the guidance I am no longer able to provide. _

_Good Luck, _

_Elena_

_PS – This is our last correspondence. Dane has been coached to deny any involvement with me. This will be better for everyone. _

I shake my head and throw the card back into the filing cabinet. When I originally received this letter from Elena, I was all for tracking Dane down once I turned eighteen. Our time together was informative (to say the least) and as a fifteen year old kid, I fucking loved every minute of it. Of course, Anastasia came along and she had me thinking differently. Anastasia and Ted came into my life and my priorities changed.

I shake my head and run a hand through my hair. Fuck… I really kind of want to call Dane. I know he is still into the scene, he has tried to contact me over the years, and I know he'll be at a club tonight. It has been so long since I've been inside a woman and if I go with Dane tonight, I know I'll find some lonely submissive in training to fuck.

It's been a while, but I know I can get a lot of practice if I go. This probably wasn't what Mia had in mind when she said "get out there", but Mia doesn't know anything about my past and she never will. There really is no harm in making a call. The idea of having sex tonight makes my dick throb after two years of living in a work filled, sexless haze.

I pick up my phone and call Dane. "Hello?"

"Dane Jones? This is Christian Grey….."

His line goes quiet, and I wait patiently for him to say anything. After a moment, I hear a chuckle over the phone. "I never thought you'd call me back…."

"I didn't think I would either," I tell him, "But I found Elena's letter by accident today and I just thought I'd call….. Can you help me out?"

I hear his smile as he speaks. "Absolutely."

**A Year Later **

** "Where are you?" I snap at Dane as he finally calls me back, "I've been waiting in this parking lot for a fucking hour."**

"I'm sorry," Dane mutters sarcastically, "But you'll be thanking me when your name isn't spread across the headlines for walking into a sex club without protection."

This is Dane at his best. All I can do is shake my head. "Why am I here?"

"I found the perfect submissive for you….," he tells me with a hint of excitement in his voice, "She is perfect. She matches your specifications to a T, and she is currently tied up in a room on the third level."

The third level of this club is for the high rollers exclusively. "Has she signed an NDA?"

He laughs, "She practically jumped to sign it; she was an easy sell…."

I know exactly what that means. Dane told this woman who I am, and of course – she signed the damn paper without a second thought. She assumes she can fuck me until I break down. She probably assumes that she'll be so damn good at whatever we'll do upstairs that I'll have to keep her around and make her my permanent submissive. I have been with women after women who have lived under this assumption, and they have all been disappointed every single damn time.

"An easy sell?"

"I'm going to be honest with you man," Dane tells me, "I like this one….. She has a certain spunk to her. She's got an independent side …."

"I like the independent ones," I say as Taylor opens my door, "I like a challenge."

"I figured," Dane laughs, "Have fun man…. Tell me how I did when you two are done…."

I hang up the phone and walk with Taylor to the back entrance. Dane has been my wingman over the last year, and I have been thankful for his help. Without him, I'd be a blue balled sack of shit lying in my living room crying over my past mistakes.

We walk inside, and Ryan takes my jacket. We walk to the elevators, and I feel the anticipation building through my veins. I'm curious about this woman. I haven't found anyone that I would want to keep around for more than a week, but hopefully my luck can change.

Taylor nods as the elevator opens to my floor. I know to meet Taylor back downstairs after we're done, and we'll leave the club immediately without a second thought. I move forward and turn left down a white hallway. There are only a few rooms down here, and I know exactly which one belongs to me. I open the door to my suite and take a step inside.

Since we're only in a sex club, and not a BDSM club, I know that these rooms will be basic and plain. My suite has white walls with black trim and gold sheets. My playroom is only days from being finished, and I know that once it is finished, there will be no need to drop into sex clubs. Dane promised that he would bring them to me.

I walk through the suite in search of her. Once I hit the bedroom, I see her faced down on the bed, and tied by a single rope. I move closer, trying to get a better look. I run my left hand across her soft crème skin, and I have to give it to Dane – he did well.

I want to see all of her so I attempt to roll her over. She submits immediately, and I feel myself grin. She submits without a question. I wonder when I'll see the independent streak that he talked so highly about.

Her body is damn near perfect. She has long, beautiful legs and a flat firm stomach. Her breasts are plump and rounded and I take it upon myself to feel the weight of them in my hands. I roll her pink nipples in between my fingers and she softly moans.

Her long brown hair is spread across the pillow, and I lean down to kiss her temple. Flashes of Ana surge through my mind and I shake them out. Dane knows my type, and I cannot help but appreciate the fine work he did in discovering this one. She is blindfolded and my mind is begging for me to take a look. I need to see if they're the same eyes – those same blue eyes. I reach for her blindfold and she fidgets a little. I doubt she was expecting so much personal contact this early. She'll have to go with it.

The blindfold falls easily in my hands, and her eyes flutter open. Her brown eyes come into view, and I shake my head. The eyes aren't the same. She isn't the same.

"I needed to see your eyes," I tell her as I realize she is waiting for me to speak, "I apologize, I know this is unorthodox."

She smiles, "I really don't mind."

"You are really very beautiful," I say as I grasp her left breast.

She smiles again, "Thank you Sir."

"While Dane obviously earned his keep tonight in finding you," I tell her, wanting to move this night along, "I don't want you tied up anymore. I want you down on your knees."

"Can I ask Sir to help me out of these ropes?" she asks; her eyes full of humor.

"Absolutely."

**I've had a morning full of meetings, and it is almost noon by the time I make it to my office. **Andrea has set a cup of coffee on my desk, and I begin sifting through my emails. Tonight, I get Ted for two whole weeks. The summer is almost over, and Ted will soon be heading to Kindergarten. I can't believe my son will be starting school soon. Five years has felt like a fucking eternity.

"I hired our new head of Human Resources," Ros says, bursting into my office. When I began my company, I needed a supportive and talented number two. I needed somebody who doesn't take bullshit and has the same vision that I do. Ros Bailey was the perfect choice.

"Thank you for knocking," I snap at her.

She rolls her eyes, "Whatever. I don't have time for your office rules. She is standing outside and I want to introduce her…."

"Wait…. You already hired her?" I ask, giving Ros my full attention, "I thought you were going to run that decision by me first?"

She shakes her head at me, "No, I don't have to run every decision by you. We're business _PARTNERS._ I found the perfect person anyways…. She was on the verge of being swept up by someone else so I made her a deal she couldn't refuse."

"How very Godfather of you," I say as I stand, "Send her in."

She opens my door wider, and my breath catches in my throat. Long legs, rounded breasts, long brown hair, and unmistakable brown eyes. I can't fucking believe it.

"Christian Grey…. Meet Leighton Miller. Leighton Miller, this Christian Grey."

"Nice to meet you," she says, stretching out her hand, "It's an honor." I remember that expression; it was the same ironic humor I saw in those brown eyes when she asked me to untie her.

"Likewise," I say, trying to sound professional.

"I am going to love it here," she says with a knowing smile, "I just have a strong gut feeling."

Gut feeling my ass.


	11. Just a kiss

**A/N – I don't own FSOG! Thanks for all the comments from the last chapter! Please leave me more! I ain't too proud to beg. **

**Chapter 11 – Just a Kiss…. **

**Christian**

** "Can I have a moment alone with Miss Miller?" I snap at Ros as she looks between us curiously. **

"What is going on?" Ros asks, her green eyes piercing into my skull. I bet she thinks I am about to fire Leighton without asking her approval. I might fire Leighton, but for reasons Ros would never expect.

"Nothing," I tell her quickly, "Since I didn't get a chance to interview her, I'd like a moment to speak with her privately."

Leighton smiles and Ros nods. "Ok…. I'll give you a chance to talk to her." Ros exits the room and I lock the door behind her. Leighton takes a seat and I walk back to my desk.

"Start talking," I hiss.

"I had an interview with Nordstrom and GEH," she begins, "Soon after I got my interviews scheduled, I got a call from a friend who knew a guy who could get me back into BDSM."

"Back into BDSM?" I ask.

She nods, "Up until a month ago, I was in a serious relationship. I thought I was going to marry the asshole, and then he left me for another woman. I was into the scene before we got together, and so I decided to go back. I'm not as serious as I probably should be….. I dabble."

Just looking at her, I have no clue why any douchebag would leave her. She is gorgeous, she has confidence dripping from her pores, and she might be the most sexual person I have ever met. She would be any man's dream.

"You dabble?"

She nods, "I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but…. When I sat down with Dane and he told me your name…. I jumped at the opportunity."

I see a flash of wanting roll through her eyes, and I have to pull back. "So let me get this straight….. You got an interview with my company, and then you spoke with Dane and jumped at the opportunity to be my submissive for the night. Do you realize how bad that looks? It makes you seem like an opportunist."

"I know exactly how that looks," she says with a shrug, "But it wasn't for career purposes. I don't need your company to move along with my career. I made this decision based on you and you only."

"For me?" I ask. Leighton is surprisingly upfront and honest, but I don't know if this means that I trust her. She is almost too honest for my liking.

"You are the hottest thing out there right now…." she tells me, "You were the Entrepreneur of the Year this year, you're on every fucking magazine… I would have to be living under a rock to not know who you are, and to not want a shot with you. It may be odd timing, but I want to work for you and I wanted to fuck you. That's all…."

We stare at each other from across the room, and I feel it. The electricity begins to bubble, and I turn away. "So how do we move on from here?" she asks.

I shake my head, "I don't know."

"Last night was awesome, and you know it," she tells me with a cocky smirk, "You and me could shake a whole block, and I want that all the time. If you want to draw up a contract…. I'll sign it."

"So that means I'll have to fire you…."

"Fire me and I'll sign a contract," she says softly, "Keep me on, and this is the last time we have this conversation."

I make my decision and turn to call Ros. I point to the door leading into my private bathroom and bedroom. I only use my in-office living quarters in cases of emergency, but today seems like a perfect day to break my rules.

"Into the bedroom, on your knees and only wearing your panties….. be ready."

**Nine Months Later**

** "What are you doing?" I chuckle as I walk into my kitchen. **Leighton is seated on the floor in her underwear and plowing into our leftovers from tonight. She grins at me.

"I'm hungry," she whines, "Someone hasn't let me have a break all night."

"I'm sorry," I tell her, taking a seat next to her, "Can you blame me? Starting tomorrow…. I get my son for two weeks straight… and it's his birthday and I need to spend that time with him. I'm going to miss you…."

She brushes a few hairs out of my face. "When will I get to meet him?" she asks softly.

"How will I explain us to him?" I ask her, leaving a small kiss on her temple, "It's complicated. I can't say that you're my girlfriend."

"Why not?" she asks, setting down her food.

"Leigh…. That's not us."

She immediately straddles my lap and presses her lips aggressively to mine. She wraps her fingers my hair and we're both lost in each other. When she begins rubbing her panty covered sex across my lap, I lose it.

"Not on the kitchen floor," I whisper in her ear. I bite her lobe playfully and she grins.

"Honestly Christian," she says breathlessly, "We've never been the dominant and the submissive. We've never been those people. We suck at those roles…. Dominants and submissives everywhere would judge us for how bad we suck. We've always been something more than that."

I lean back against the cabinet and she kisses me on the cheek. Am I really doing this? Am I really going to give her something I haven't been able to give to anyone in the past year?

"Ted's birthday party is tomorrow," I say, holding her close and still keeping my eyes shut, "It's painful to watch Eddie and Ana…. Being a couple….. Last year sucked, I felt like an interloper at my own son's birthday."

"Then let me come with you tomorrow," She says kissing me several more times, "I've been dying to meet that little boy…. And quite honestly, Ana too."

I open my eyes and she grins, "Why Ana?"

She shrugs, "I don't know…. She was your first love. You very obviously still have deep feelings for her."

I try to quickly apologize and she shakes her head. "I still have feelings for Jake too. It's normal." Jealousy surges through me, and I hold Leighton tighter. That asshole left her and she still has feelings for him? What the hell? Fuck, am I jealous?

"He left you," I point out, not hiding my bitterness, "Why do you have feelings for that asshole?"

"Ana chose to move on with her life after you went through rehab," Leighton points out, "Why do you still have feelings for her?"

"Because," I snap back, "Because…. She deserves to live the life she wants. She didn't cheat on me when I kept hurting and hurting her. She took a step back and decided her independence was more important to her."

She nods and kisses me on the forehead. "It sucks being left behind, doesn't it?"

I hold her close, her chest is touching mine and lips are at my ear. "Sleep with me in my bed tonight."

I feel her smile against my cheek. "I would love to baby…."

**I grab Leighton's hand as we walk through the front door of Eddie and Ana's home. **I look around for my son and for Ana, but all I see are kids running around and parents chatting. Leighton happily follows along as we search for my son, and I suddenly get very nervous. Ana's parents are guaranteed to make an appearance at this party, and I know they won't be too happy that I brought a date to my son's party. My parents have planned a party that they'll throw for Ted next week, and I suddenly find myself exasperated over the impending interrogation they'll give to my new girlfriend.

"Ok, I see a small miniature version of the man holding my hand in the back over there," Leighton says, pointing across their backyard, "Could he be yours?"

I laugh, "No that's my other kid." I spot Ted and he spots me. His expression morphs and he races across the lawn. Ted flies head first into my legs and I chuckle at his exuberance.

"DADDY!" he yells, "You made it." I pick my little man up and squeeze him tight.

"I did make it," I say, examining my son. He grows daily and I feel like I have missed so many milestones. "How is your big day buddy? You having fun?"

He nods adamantly, and then turns his focus to Leighton. "Who are you?" he asks, his little brows furrowing with confusion.

"I have someone important for you to meet," I tell him, shifting him in my arms, "This is Leighton…. She's my new girlfriend."

Ted looks at her with a strange expression. "Girlfriend?"

"Yeah…. You know all those girls who follow you around school…. You have plenty of girlfriends too."

He scrunches his nose and Leighton laughs, "I don't have girlfriends."

"Damn, I thought I was raising a seven year old pimp…" I say with a laugh, "Where is your mother at?"

He shrugs his shoulders, "I don't know." He turns to Leighton, "Did you bring me a present?"

Leighton bursts into laughter, "I helped your Dad pick out your present – does that work for you?"

He just nods, but continues to stare Leighton down. "My Mom is around here," he tells Leighton, "And she's a lot prettier then you are."

"Theodore Raymond," I hiss at my son, "That was rude and you need to apologize."

"But Mommy is prettier," he tells me, "Her brown hair looks fake."

I kneel down to admonish him for his words. "You need to remember that you will spend the next two weeks with me, and I can take your second birthday party away from you if you continue to be rude…. Do you understand me?"

He nods with a pout. "Yes Daddy."

I hug him and am quickly greeted by two long legs. I stand up, and take in Anastasia as she walks closer to us. Her long brown hair is thrown up into a small bun and her body's soft curves are accentuated by a short purple sundress.

"I'm glad you could make it," Ana says, forcing out a smile. She doesn't look happy, and the fact that I don't see Eddie anywhere concerns me.

I feel Leighton move beside me, and I see Ana's fake smile visibly fade. "Ana," I choke out, "This is Leighton Miller…. Leighton Miller…. Anastasia Steele."

"It's so nice to meet you," Leighton says, holding her hand for Ana to shake. Ana reapplies her best fake smile for Leighton, and shakes her hand.

"Who are you exactly?" Ana asks.

"My girlfriend," I tell her, "We've been seeing each other for a while."

Ana nods, eyes roaming down Leighton's body. "Well… I'm glad you could make it, Leighton."

"Likewise," Leighton says with a smile, "It seems that your son is a whiz on hair color…. He could spot my bad brown hair job from a mile away."

Ana looks down at Ted, who is holding tight to her left, and then back to me and Leighton. "What?"

"Ted told Leighton that her brown hair is fake, but don't worry – he was reprimanded for those comments."

I see a smile tease her lips, and she nods fervently. "Well…. I'm sorry Leighton. I'm a hairdresser so he has unfortunately spent too much time at a beauty salon."

"What salon do you work at?" Leighton asks, "I need a new place, but I am having trouble finding a good place to go."

"I work at Salon 43…."

"Salon 43?" Leighton gasps, "I have been dying to get in for appointment for weeks! I'm on Brooke's waiting list."

Ana snorts, "Brooke has a long list…. I'll see if I can get you in with Serena."

"You would do that?" Leighton asks happily, "Breathtakingly beautiful and a lifesaver…. You really are the best."

Ana forces out a second fake smile and pulls her cell phone out of her dress pocket. "My phone," she says to herself as she answers, "Hello." Ted runs off to play, and Leighton squeezes my hand firmly.

"Where the hell have you been? You went to work and didn't tell me?" she hisses, "Yeah…. He is right here. What? What are you talking about? Fine. We're coming. Yes, I'll bring him with me so you can hell at him yourself…"

She hangs up and motions me to follow her. Leighton merely nods with understanding, and I walk off with Ana. "Eddie says there is a delivery blocking the street," she tells me as we walk back through her house, "What the hell did you get Ted for his birthday?"

When we make it to the front lawn, I am greeted by Taylor and my scooter for Ted. I also bought him a pretty big jungle gym, and they are both taking up a lot of space outside their house. I am afraid to hear what Ana will say about the ridiculously large and unsafe present I got for our seven year old. I turn to Ana and I realize quickly that she is completely focused on Eddie. Eddie is also across the street barking at Taylor with a sling around his large left arm.

She surges forward and I follow. I discreetly nod at Taylor and he begins moving the scooter and jungle gym into their garage.

"Why do you have a sling around your arm?" she yells at Eddie.

"I'm fine, calm down…." He grunts at her as he walks back to the house.

"Why didn't you call me and tell me you were in the fucking hospital?"

"Because I knew you'd be mad that I went to work this morning, and I didn't want to make it worse."

I feel like an interloper on their argument, but I must admit that I am personally enjoying seeing them fight. They always seem to be "in love" and "perfect" and I've never heard them argue like this before. I've never been impressed by the way he treats Ana. He treats her like his girlfriend when he should treat her like a fucking Queen.

"This is so typical," she snaps at him, "You do whatever the hell you want and you don't care what I think…."

"My collar bone is broken, and I am in pain," he says, opening the front door, "So I am going to go to bed and you can fight with me about this later." He slams the door in her face, and she stands behind stunned by his behavior. She turns around to face me.

"Is Taylor moving his presents?" she snaps.

I nod, "He is."

"Good…. Well…. We better get back. Ted is going to want cake soon."

"Ana…. Are you ok?" I ask, trying to move closer to her.

She takes a step back and gives me a fake smile, "I am super-duper. Never been better…."

She walks back through the house and I quickly follow behind her.

**Present Day - (Side note: We will stay here for the rest of the story! Hooray!) **

** "Well it sure is a surprise to see you here," I say as Ana walks through the house with our boy in her arms, "I wasn't expecting you. Don't you usually send your mother?"**

"I am full of surprises Grey," she says with a smirk, "Where is his room?"

I point to where she needs to go and she carries him upstairs. I'm surprised to see her. I thought she would be angry with me forever for how I reacted to her engagement to Eddie. She has always sent someone else over to Escala when she needs to deliver him; this is her first trip to my apartment.

"He went down easy," she says as she makes her way back to where I am seated, "This is a really nice apartment."

I nod, "Thank you."

"And his room is perfect," she says, smiling to herself. Ted's room is outfitted with Mariner's paraphernalia, and it is the perfect bedroom for my son.

"It's been like that since I bought the place," I tease her.

She smiles, "I know…. I should have been over here a long time ago. I admit that." She takes a seat at my kitchen counter, and she gives me a hopeful look. Obviously, somebody wants permission to stick around and chat.

"Do you want a drink?" I ask.

She nods, "Well wait…. Is Leighton here?"

I shake my head, "No, she is visiting her sister in Tacoma."

"Then I would love a drink…." She says with a chuckle.

I laugh and find her a glass. "Listen, I'm sorry for the way I handled your engagement announcement. I'm happy for you, I really am." I've been coaching myself to say that without making any sort of over the top facial expression. I'm really not happy for them, but if this is what she wants.

She nods, "Well thank you…. That means a lot. I know it's going to be a big adjustment."

"Alcohol?" I ask her, realizing she never gave me her drink order.

"Some of your whiskey if you'd be willing to share.…."

"I'm always willing to share…."

She laughs, "So… I have some more news… I got into the University of Washington today."

I nearly drop my glass as I face her. "Seriosuly? Baby, that's amazing."

She nods with a smirk, "Thanks. But it's going to add a lot to my already busy schedule."

"If you need me to take Ted more often…. We can hire a nanny…. It doesn't matter. I want you to follow your dreams. You know never wanted to be inside a salon all day…."

She takes in a contented sigh. "Thank you," she says softly. Her eyes begin to water and I reach over to squeeze her hand.

"What is wrong?"

She shakes her head, "I told Eddie…. And he wasn't exactly thrilled."

"What do you mean he wasn't thrilled," I snap. That bastard better not hold her back, she has been held back enough by me.

"He's just afraid that the wedding is going to be pushed back because of it," she admits, pushing back a few tears, "And … that I won't have any time for him and Ted."

"But you should have been able to go to college from the start…. This is my fault," I tell her, "You shouldn't have to push back your dreams…. Weddings be damned."

"He told me I should go after we get married…."

I shake my head, "That's not right…. That's really fucking shitty of him to say that. Eddie is an asshole."

"What about you?" she asks suddenly, "Are you and Leighton ever going to…."

"Get married?"

She nods. She looks at me nervously, and I try to come up with the right words. "That's what she wants…."

She takes in a sharp breath, "Who can blame her? You're a catch."

"You didn't want to marry me," I point out. She takes in a sharp breath, and I see more tears begin to form. Shit. I'm a fucking asshole.

"I think about the past a lot," she tells me, her eyes focused on her drink, "I think about what would have happened if I stayed with you."

I take a seat across from her. "What have you come up with?"

"When I was nineteen… I feared the worst. I was never one of those teenagers who dreamed big because I was only thinking day to day. I kept thinking that something would happen…. And I would make a stupid decision and you would relapse and you would die from the drugs and leave me as a single mother."

"Holy fuck Ana," I huff, "God… were you that stressed back then?"

"Yeah," she nods, "The baby, school, being away from my family for the first time in my life…. I was stressed out of my mind. On top of trying to be there for you…."

"Wait," I interrupt as I grab her hand, "Do you think you're the reason I got my ass in trouble with drugs…. You and the baby?"

She shrugs, "What else could it have been…?"

"Holy fuck," I breathe, "Listen to me and listen to me good…. I got in trouble with cocaine because I was being the world's biggest fucktard. I knew what I was doing…. Every lie I told you about being clean – I was the one who made those decisions…. not you. If anything, you both were the reason I got clean. I cannot believe I let you walk away without you knowing that. I should have told you that the minute I was released from rehab."

She wipes away a few tears from her eyes and shakes her head. "I'm sorry for leaving you when you got clean."

I snort, "You don't need to apologize for that. We are adults. You didn't want us anymore after all the crap I put you through and I had to live with that… "

She takes in a deep breath, and I wipe the last tears from her eyes. I hold her chin in my hand and lean over to kiss her cheek. "Your lips are always so soft when you cry…."

Her breathing hitches and I see nothing but lust in her eyes. "Kiss me," she whispers.

I stare at her for a second, not sure if I heard her correctly. I move my lips closer, silently asking for permission. She moves the rest of the way and softly presses her lips to mine. We slowly move our lips together, as if we're discovering what it means to kiss each other again.

I hold the left side of her face with my hand and she runs her right hand through my hair. Our lips move faster, and before I realize it, I have her pinned to the kitchen island. I move my body over hers, and she holds on tight, slamming her sex against my hardening erection. She moans loudly into my mouth as we continue to move our clothed body parts together, causing electrifying friction between us as we move.

My mind comes to a halt as the truth invades. I have a girlfriend. She has a fiancé. We need to stop.

"Ana," I breathe into her mouth, "Ana…. We need to stop."

She grabs for my crotches and groans. "I want you."

It takes all the power left in me to stop her. "I want you to, but we have to stop…."

She lays her head down and lets out a defeated sigh. "Fine," she says as I jump off, "You're right…."

We adjust our clothing and she grabs her purse. As she makes her way out, I grab her arm and pull her into me. She wraps her arms around me and kisses me. I squeeze her ass, and she moves her frenzied hands up and down my body.

"No," she says, quickly backing away, "You were right…. I've gotta go. I'll see you in two weeks." She walks away, and I watch her go.

_ What the fuck just happened. _

**A/N2 – Please let me know what you think! Thanks!**


	12. Chocolate Chip Pancakes

**A/N – Wow! Thank you for all the great reactions from the last chapter! I hope that continues :-)! Enjoy and I don't own FSOG. **

**Chapter 12 – Chocolate Chip Pancakes **

**Ana**

** I walk into my house, still shaken from my encounter with Christian. **I need to go for a run, or take fifteen cold showers - anything to get my mind back on track. Tonight, was confusing and hot as hell. I shake my head, and throw off my shoes. I have to let this go, what happened tonight was wrong and bad…. and hot. Fuck, what am I going to do?

"Ana?" I hear from across the house. Eddie's voice knocks me out of my thoughts and anger resurges through my veins.

"Yeah," I snap at him as I walk into the living room. Eddie is seated on the couch, his head in his hands. He looks up at me, and he seems to be still upset about our fight. Good, he should be upset. He acted like an asshole.

"Ana…. Come here," he pleads, reaching his hand out for me, "I'm sorry about earlier."

"I don't want to talk about this right now," I tell him, "Your moment to be happy for me was two hours ago."

"Ana, don't do this," he pleads as he moves toward me, "I'm so sorry… you have to forgive me for how I acted."

"So are you going to support me in going to college, and not be a total asshole?"

He shakes his head and I feel my anger quickly returning. "Can you just wait until we get married?" he pleads, "I'll walk down there myself and enroll you once the wedding license is signed."

"Why is it so important that we get married first?"

He shakes his head, "Because I can't lose you. I can't. I need to get that wedding ring on your finger before I lose my mind. I need you to be mine, and I can't let anything get in the way of that."

I take a seat next to him and hold his hand. "You won't lose me. I'm not going anywhere." As those words fall out of my mouth, all I can picture is Christian and me, dry humping in his kitchen. I take in a sharp breath and turn away slightly.

"I need reassurance, I need the legality," he says as he squeezes my hand, "I need you to be Mrs. Edward Jiotti as soon as humanly possible."

"Edward," I snicker.

He laughs, "Make fun of my name all you want, but you'll have it attached to yours very soon…."

I jump up, needing to step away. "Let me think about school….," I tell him, "I'll let you know soon."

His face changes and I know he isn't happy. Too fucking bad… this is my choice – not his. "I'm going to take a shower…."

"Can I join you?" he asks with a seductive smile that always used to make me weak at the knees. Tonight, that smile is only a reminder of what I was doing with my ex an hour ago.

"I love you, but I would like to take at least one shower without you pawing at me," I say as I walk upstairs, "Rain check."

He nods with disappointment and I make the trek up to my bathroom. As I begin to get ready for my shower, I get a text message from Christian.

_**Tomorrow Morning – you, me, Ted and chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast. You don't work tomorrow, right? **_

__I giggle as I reply back.

_**I do not. Does Gail work on Saturdays? Who is going to make these pancakes? **_

I continue getting ready and Christian replies quickly with a new message.

_**I was hoping the mother of my son could make them…. **_

__I laugh as I quickly think up a reply. I know Eddie works tomorrow morning so this would be a perfect escape. I can sit with my ex-boyfriend, our son, and have pancakes like any normal person – right?

_**She can make them, but she requests no funny business from her baby daddy. **_

__I hope making a joke about tonight's "encounter" won't be inappropriate.

_**I make no promises… :)**_

I jump in the shower, and I try to keep my mind straight. We can be adults about this. We can brush it off like nothing happened. At least I hope we can.

**"Ana," I hear a whisper in my ear, "Baby… I gotta go."**

I pry my eyes open and I see Eddie hovering over me. "You're going to work? It's so early."

He laughs, "It's not that early. It's 6:45…." He gives me a light kiss on the lips and before he can deepen the kiss, I turn over.

"Um…. Absolutely not," he laughs gruffly. He jumps on the bed and drags me closer to him. I giggle as he presses his lips all over my face. "I'm going to be gone all fucking day… I need you to kiss me now…. and like you mean it baby."

I kiss him back as he squeezes my ass. "Go to work caveman."

"Goodbye, Mrs. Caveman." He leaves me one last kiss and he is out the door. After a second of silence, I sit up and quickly start to get ready. I have two boys across town that needs me to make pancakes for them, and I am more than thrilled to make their pancake eating dreams come true.

**When I walk through Christian's front door, I see both Ted and Christian at the kitchen counter, patiently waiting. **My heart leaps out of my chest whenever I see them together. Ted is truly Christian's miniature, and he absolutely adores his Dad. Seeing them together is one of my greatest joys as a mother.

"Mommy!" Ted squeals when he sees me, "Daddy said you are going to make us pancakes."

"I am," I say as I give my boy a kiss on the forehead, "How does chocolate chip pancakes sound?"

I don't think there is a happier child in this world. He beams as I walk through the kitchen to get breakfast started. Christian smiles mischievously as I pull out of a few pots and pans.

"What is Eddie doing this morning?" Christian asks nonchalantly.

I smirk, "He is working….. all day today."

He smirks back, "Well good…. I'd hate to have to share you today."

"Good," I say as I pull the chocolate chips out of his cabinet, "because I'm all yours…."

"Are you going to go to my soccer game?" Ted asks.

"Of course," I say as I begin mixing the chocolate chips into the pancake batter, "You guys have me for an entire day."

I lean over to kiss my little boy, and Christian gives me a knowing smile. I try my best to focus on making breakfast, but it's hard when he looks at me like that.

"All day," Christian says with another knowing little smirk, "I think I can work with that…."

**The pancakes have been eaten, and I have a little boy passed out on my lap. **Christian leans over to kiss his forehead and then he leans over to kiss mine. I feel need bolt through my body, and I try to quickly change the subject before I combust.

"He always falls asleep after a big meal," I say softly as I run a hand through his copper hair, "Just like when he was a baby…."

He nods, "Thank you for coming over to make breakfast. I don't think I've seen him happier."

"I know," I snort, "I don't think I've heard him talk more….. telling us all those stories. He was happy to have a captive audience. When is his soccer game?"

"2:30," Christian says as he picks him up, "He can take a small nap…. He has time." I sit patiently as Christian carries Ted to his bedroom. Christian and I have a lot to talk about. To start, we need to talk about his flirtatious behavior. I don't know what has gotten into him, but he can't continue to act like that. We also need to talk about that kiss last night, but I have no idea where to start.

"So have you decided anything about school yet?" Christian asks as returns, surprising me with his conversation topic of choice.

"Um…. Not really."

"Did you get a chance to talk to Eddie?" he asks, taking his seat back next to me.

"I did."

"Did he apologize for being douche?" he asks, as he wraps his arm around my shoulders.

"Christian," I chastise him.

"What?" he asks innocently, "It's just an arm Ana…. Quit changing the subject. Did he apologize?"

"Kind of," I tell him, "He did, but he still wants us to get married first." He nods and I know I have to say something about last night. "What happened last night can't happen again. I know you've been flirtatious today, but we can't…."

He leans in closer, leaving a tiny kiss on my temple. Goosebumps prick my skin, and my breathing accelerates. My body is slowly giving into him, and all he has done has kissed my forehead.

"What were you saying about we can't…."

I take in a shallow breath, and try with all my might to be reasonable. "You said it last night…. We have Eddie and Leighton and we can't…."

His lips press softly into mine and I lightly moan at the contact. My body is pleading for me to give in, pleading for me to let this happen. He drags me closer and I straddle his lap. As our kissing intensifies, I run my hands through his hair, enjoying the feeling of him beneath my fingertips. I am on fire, and I want this so bad.

"I want you," he says hoarsely, "Come on baby…."

"Take me to bed," I whisper in his ear, "Now."

He picks me up as I wrap my legs around his waist. My lips pull and tug at his ear as he walks into his bedroom. His responding moans are intoxicating, and when he finally lays me down, I am wet and exploding with need.

I sit up and pull down his sweat pants. I grab on to his hard erection and I hear his groans deep inside his chest. I put my lips around the end of his cock and begin licking.

"Ana quit," he huffs, "I want you naked first…"

I pull my lips off his cock and quickly move to pull my shirt off my body. He stares hypnotically as I throw my shirt to the ground and unhook my bra. He grabs my bare breasts and rolls my nipples between his fingers. I drop my head back and moan at the feeling.

"I need to be inside of you," he says huskily into my ear, "Please." I roll my jeans down to my feet and he is hovering over me in an instant.

He rips my panties off my body, and I groan with pleasure over such a sexy move. Holy hell, I've never had anyone do that before.

We both have our pants still on when he slowly enters me. I buck up ward and I sink my nails into the muscles of Christian's back. The feeling of him deep inside of me is intoxicating and I grab hold of his taut ass to urge him faster.

"Harder, Christian," I scream, "Harder…."

"Fuck Ana, I'm so close," he chokes out as he continues to move, "Fuck."

He huffs and groans as he continues to move, and I think he might actually go before me. He slows down his pace and licks and bites my nipples. He moves his finger down to my clit and starts to circle it slowly.

"Oh baby…." I hiss as I feel myself moving forward.

"You're on birth control, right?" he chokes out, "Fuck, you're squeezing me so hard…"

"Yeah," I moan as I feel myself start to lose it, "Come inside me…"

With those words, he finds his release and I follow seconds later. We hold on tight to each other as we scream in unison. When we're done, he pulls out of me and turns over, huffing and puffing as his breathing calms.

"Holy shit," I say to myself as I sit up on his bed.

He chuckles, "Holy shit is right."

"I think we both got better since the last time we did that…."

He laughs deeply, "We were nineteen, and now we're twenty six. If we didn't get better, I'd be worried for both of us."

I nod as I kick my jeans off my feet, and Christian does the same. He turns over and lightly caresses my face. He leans over to kiss my forehead and I hold him close, enjoying the feeling of him next to me.

"We have time," I whisper after a few moments of silence, "You want to do that again?"

He smiles a wicked smile as he grabs on to my hand. "This time," he says as I straddle him, "I want you on top…."

_**You want to do lunch? I've got some time…**_

__I rub my eyes and re-read Eddie's text message. I am the worst person in the entire fucking world. I just had sex four times with the father of my son while my fiancé works hard to support the new life I told him I wanted. Yes, Eddie and I aren't perfect, and I am not thrilled with him right now, but that doesn't excuse my behavior.

"He's almost ready for his game," Christian says as he walks down the stairs, "I think that nap did him some good."

How can he do that? How can he act like nothing is going on between us? "Good," I say, trying to hide my chaotic feelings, "We should be going soon."

Christian grabs my arm with the same hand that was inside of me thirty minutes ago. "Ana…. Are you ok?"

"No," I say, shaking my head, "We just did a very bad and terrible thing."

He nods, "I know…."

"I just cheated on Eddie and you just cheated on Leighton."

"I am aware of our situation," he says, nodding his head, "Maybe we just needed this to get each other out of our systems…."

"Out of our systems…."

"Life is about to get real for you…. You're getting married," he says, his face firm, "Maybe… we needed one last time before…."

"Before we're done for good…."

He immediately walks away, and I can't help but notice the sad expression in his eyes. I don't like his response. I don't like it at all. I don't want to be done for good. I don't think I'm ready to be done for good.

"Mommy," I hear Ted yell from the top of the staircase, "Look at my new uniform…. There are thunderbolts on it."

I try to force out a smile for my little boy even when my mind is full of chaos. "It looks great baby," I tell him as he grins at me. Ted walks downstairs while Christian helps him with his knee pads.

I quickly type a response back to Eddie.

_**Ted's soccer game is this afternoon…. Sorry. **_

He quickly types a response back.

_**I forgot! I'm sorry! Have fun! I love you…. **_

__I am the worst person in the entire world.


	13. It's about to get really complicated

**A/N – So… I had a whole list of things to do and then it started raining. Rain always gets me in the mood to write so here ya go. Thank you for ALL those awesome responses…. You guys are the best. I apologize for some parts of this, but it will get us back on track. ENJOY! **

**Chapter 13 – It's about to get complicated…. **

**Christian **

** I feel cold.** I feel movement around me, but I am not awake enough to determine what is going on exactly. Suddenly, I feel warmth between my legs, and I let out an uncontrollable groan. Did Ana come back? Is Ana here right now? I pry my eyes open to see where the source of my pleasure is coming from.

I see a brown head bobbing between my legs, but I know it's not Ana. "Leighton?"

My dick drops out of her mouth with a pop. "Hey baby…. I missed you."

"Fuck," I hiss as I sit up, "What are you doing?"

"Pleasuring my man," she says with a slurred tongue, "Now lay back and enjoy."

I sit up closer to examine her, and I realize that she is completely shit faced. "You're drunk?"

"I went to dinner in the city with my sister," she says with a giggle, "And you know how horny alcohol makes me…."

"Did she drive you home? Was she drunk too?"

She lets out an exasperated huff, "She was not drinking and she drove me here. I didn't need Taylor to pick me up. Quit acting like my Dad and act more like the guy I want to get off…"

She throws me back down on the bed, and she continues to suck on my dick. I don't want her to get me off. I want to go back to sleep, and sleep for a whole damn week. Frustration blooms deep inside of me when I realize that Eddie and Ana could be having sex right now too. How could they not be? They're engaged to be married. Today's encounter was just a one-time thing, and she is never going to want to have sex with me again.

Leighton stands up, obviously frustrated with the fact that I haven't come yet. She begins pulling off her clothes. She looks good in black lace panties, a matching bra, and thigh highs. She looks real good.

"Do you want to fuck my tits?" she asks nonchalantly.

"Whatever you want to do," I tell her, not hiding my indifference. She looks good but I'm wiped from today.

She pouts, "I've been gone for a fucking week and you don't want me….?"

I turn to the clock next to me, and see that it is 3 AM. "Leigh…. It's 3 in the morning. How about we continue this when I'm more awake?"

She grumbles, and moves into bed beside me. I pull up my pants and she cuddles in close. "I'm not much for night sex," I tell her, hoping it will help lessen the blow of rejection.

She snorts, "Says who…."

"It's been a long week Leigh."

She smiles and caresses my cheek. "Fine…. But tomorrow we're giving Ted a couple hours with Gail and we're not leaving this bed until you and I are both satisfied."

I force out a smile, "Deal."

**Ana **

** I like working Sundays. **It's typically quiet in the salon because only several hairdressers come in on Sundays. We also only work from one to five, giving us the rest of the day with our families. Eddie and I still haven't talked about school, and I kind of want to keep it that way. I don't want to get mad at him again, mad enough that I run into Christian's arms. Christian is another topic that I can't even think about right now, the thought of him drives me crazy.

"You're quiet," Serena says as she prepares her station, "Is there something wrong?"

"No, nothing at all," I say as I prepare for my first client. My first client today is Lacy Burns, a sweet grad student at the University of Washington. I shake my head in frustration. I really don't want to think about school today, but Lacy is sweet so I'll let her talk about whatever she wants.

"Well, get ready because Corporate Barbie is my first appointment today," Serena informs me, "She begged for me to pencil her in today."

"Leighton is your first client?" I think I'm going to be sick.

She nods, "She begged for me to see her…."

"I've always wanted to know…. What's her real hair color?"

"Brown," she says as she begins mixing Leighton's color, "But like a mousy brown…. It's not cute. I would dye my hair dark brown if I was her too."

We walk out to the front and Lacy and Leighton are already waiting with in reception. Leighton stands and smiles and I kind of really want to punch her in her pretty face.

"Lacy, you're with me…." I say, gesturing for Lacy to follow me.

"It's good to see you Ana," Leighton says with a wave, "Apparently Ted did really good in his game on Saturday because his mother cooked him a hearty breakfast."

I freeze, and I know my face must show my shock. This was what she wanted. She wanted to force her way into an appointment with Serena to scare me stupid about seeing Christian without her knowledge. Bring it on bitch…. She's got not proof.

"I did…" I tell her as I point Lacy to where she needs to sit, "Christian and my son asked me to come over and cook for them." She isn't going to pull this on me. I was asked over to Christian's apartment by Christian. She should be pissed off at him.

"Well, in the future I would like you to not be alone with my boyfriend without my knowledge."

"I was asked to come over," I snap at her, "Christian asked me to come over so we could spend time with OUR son."

"I spoke with Christian and he has been informed that he should not do that again," Leighton snaps right back, "But I just wanted to make sure you were aware of the conversation I had with him. That better not happen again…"

Thank God it's only Serena, Leighton, Lacy, and several other hairdressers in the salon today. I would die from embarrassment to be reprimanded by Corporate Barbie in front of anyone else.

"We're good," I hiss as I turn to walk away. Lacy's eyes are wide, and I force myself to give all of my attention to her.

"Daaaaaaaayummmmm," Serena whispers under her breath, "I better keep you two away from each other. I don't want a cat fight on a Sunday…. That's the Lord's day."

I shake my head and get to work on Lacy's hair. She begins speaking at length about grad school at U Dub, and I try my hardest to keep my focus on her. Leighton turns to look at me at one point, and her expression could turn anyone to stone.

"I had a great time with Jordan," Leighton says loudly from across the salon, "And when I got back…. Christian ravaged me. It was so hot."

I stop my movements and try my hardest not to ruin Lacy's haircut.

"That's nice," I hear Serena say blankly from across the studio. I want to chuckle at Serena's reaction, but Leighton immediately goes into details.

"In the morning, Gail watched his son and we did nothing but stay in bed…."

"Ana," Lacy asks sweetly, "Are you ok?"

I try to nod and smile happily. "Yeah of course…. Sorry. So did you say you wanted bangs?"

**I walk straight into the backroom at five a clock and I feel my legs give out underneath me. **Of course he had sex with her. Of course our Saturday together meant nothing to him. I can't compete with her. She is perfect and I am a hairdresser with a college acceptance letter and a fiancé who doesn't give a shit. I dial his number before I even realize what I am doing.

"Hey you…." He croons. I feel sick.

"Is she there because I have a lot to say to you right now…."

"She isn't here," he says, concern evident in his tone, "What's wrong?"

"You slept with her," I blurt out, "You slept with her…."

He takes in a resigned sigh, "Yeah…."

I feel like a dagger is piercing through my heart. "So what we did…. Meant nothing to you?"

"Ana," he breathes, "It meant something to me…. "

"Then why…."

"Because this is complicated," he interrupts me, "Because we haven't talked and you haven't told me how you felt. How was I supposed to know that it meant more to you when you don't talk to me? How do I know you weren't fucking your FIANCE all night? I'm not going to stop my life until you give me a good reason to stop it…."

I am shaking with anger and disappointment on the floor of the break room. Tears fall down my face and I know what I need to do. One screw up and I am already in too deep with Christian. I need to stop this. I'm supposed to be with Eddie and Christian is supposed to be with Leighton and I should have never got that crossed. I am in too deep, and I need to stop this.

"You made your choice," I sob, "And I am going to make mine…."

I hang up the phone before Christian can say another word.

**I walk into my house and I take in a deep breath. **I don't know what Eddie has been up to, but our home looks beautiful. There are candles everywhere and rose pedals spread across the house. He walks around the corner, and walks over to me… regret covering his face.

"What is all of this?" I ask as he wraps his arms around me.

"I've been an asshole… and I'm sorry." He leans over to kiss my forehead.

"You're sorry…."

"I want you to have everything you want," he tells me, "We'll make this work. We'll plan our wedding. You'll go to school and work and be super Mom."

"Really?" I ask in shock, "Why the sudden change in heart?" I lean over a kiss and I feel him smile against my lips.

"The couple hours you were at work I got to thinking," he says shaking his head, "I know if I keep acting like this…. I'll lose you and I can't lose you. I just need to let this go. I don't want to be without you baby…. I love you."

He wraps his arms around me and I burrow my head in the crook of his neck. "I love you," he says softly, "And I don't ever want to hurt you. I love you."

"I love you," I choke out.

"Let's have dinner baby," he says as he kisses my nose, "I'm spoiling my girl tonight…."

**Christian **

** Leighton's head is on my lap and a movie is playing in the background. **Ted is already in bed. I hugged him tighter tonight before he went to sleep. Ted is my one connection back to Ana, and I just felt the need to hold him close. I hated hearing her cry. I hated that she was so damn upset. I hate that she's probably having sex with him right now. If I could just talk to her….

"I'm getting sleepy…." Leighton says as she sits up, "Kiss me."

"Why did you go to the salon today and spout off a bunch of shit in front of Ana."

Her eyes go wide, "Did you talk to her?"

I lie. "She called me, checking on Ted, and she told me how descriptive you were about our sex life…."

She rolls her eyes, "I know she's the mother of your kid, but you talk to her way too much."

"You need to either shut your big mouth when you walk into that salon or you need to find another salon to go to…."

Her jaw drops, "Why should I…."

"You know what you're doing, and you need to fucking quit," I spit, "Quit pulling that bullshit."

"Why does she care?" she snaps, "She has Eddie…. They're getting married soon so why does it matter?"

"I don't want you putting our personal life on blast no matter who is in that damn salon, do you fucking understand me?"

She wipes off a few tears as my phone buzzes. "I'm sorry Christian…. I won't do that again," she answers softly. I check my phone and I try not to react by the four simple words on my screen.

_**Can you get away? **_

__"I'm going to bed," Leighton says softly, "I need sleep." I quickly reply back.

_**Do you want to go on a run?**_

__"I'm going to go on a run," I tell her, "I need it to think."

She walks over and hugs me. "I'm sorry… Have a good run and please try to forgive me." I kiss her on the forehead before I move to get changed. I get a response back seconds later.

_**Absolutely. **_

__**It's cold in the park, and I jog in place to keep myself warm. **For a split second, I think she might not show up. She needs to follow through, and I need to tell her how I feel.

She walks forward, and I see the determination in her eyes. She is here on a mission, and I am suddenly worried about what this mission might be. She looks over at a park bench and then her eyes scan the vacant park in front of us.

"Ana…."

"Sit on the bench," she requests, pointing to the bench behind us.

"What?" I ask, "Ana… we need to talk."

"I don't want to talk," she says softly, adamantly shaking her head, "Sit on the bench."

I follow her request and take a seat on the bench. She sits in between my legs and quickly pulls my pants down. Before I can say a word, her lips are on my dick.

"Woah, Ana," I hiss in shock, "We're outside in a public park."

"Nobody is out here," she says between licks, "I need you."

"Ana what is going on?" I ask as my head falls backwards. Fuck. It's cold, and this feels so good.

She stands up and leans forward. "I'm amending the choice I made earlier," she says, full determination in her eyes. She shimmies out of her jogging pants and even in the cold of night – I'm ready for her.

"We need to talk," I say as she positions herself over me, "We can't keep…" Before I can say another word, she slowly slides down my cock and I am not even sure what we were talking about before.

"Love me," she begs as she moves, "Please Christian."

I hold onto her hips and move her up and down. Up and down and up and fucking down. She feels so fucking good and nothing, not even my little sexcapade today with Leighton, could replace how right Ana feels right now.

We move quietly in the dead of night and when she comes, I cover her cries in a deep kiss. I come soon after, spilling deep inside her. She moves off me and quickly pulls her pants back up and I do the same. I snuggle next to her on the bench and she kisses my neck.

"Who is with our son right now?" she asks once her breathing calms.

"Gail… and Leighton."

She nods, "Good…"

"Ana," I ask, kissing her temple, "What are we going to do? This obviously isn't just…."

"Can I just enjoy this moment with you, and can we not talk about everything else….. please Christian?"

"We need to talk about this sometime….."

"I know," she interrupts me, "I know."

Even though this is wrong and we're both hurting two good people along the way, I can't help but think that this is right, that this is exactly where I am supposed to be. I am falling in love for a second time with my high school sweetheart, and I can't stop this. _I'm not even sure if I want to stop it…_


	14. The Ides of March

**Chapter 14 – The Ides of March **

**Ana**

** My body is buzzing with anticipation as I ride the elevator up to Christian's floor.** We took a break from us during the holidays, and it has been two weeks of waiting and anticipation. We've texted flirty messages back and forth, but it hasn't been enough. My body misses his, and I have been waiting for this moment all day.

Christmas came and went, and we played the role of the happy separated family all too well. Since Ted was with me on Thanksgiving, he spent Christmas with Christian, Leighton and the Greys. Because of Ted's absence on Christmas day, Eddie and I had Christmas early with Ted, my family and Eddie's family. Eddie's family was thrilled to have an early Christmas with their future grandson, and could not stop talking about the kids I will soon have with Eddie. Eddie reassured me that we won't rush baby making, but I could see that he didn't have the conviction behind his words. He wants kids and he wants them soon. I love it when other people think they can decide my reproductive habits. I shake my head and focus on the elevator door.

I get out on Christian's floor and hold tight to our bag of food. I have no idea if we'll actually end up eating this food, and I really don't care. Andrea nods at me as I move through reception and I walk straight into his office without any interrogation. I throw the food on the nearest couch, and I focus all of my attention to the delicious man in front of me.

I feel like I've been walking through the dessert for forty years when I see Christian at his desk. He is definitely a sight for sore eyes, and I cannot hold back my need to feel him all over me. He smiles when he turns to look at me, and I expire on the spot. He points to the door and mouths _"lock the door". _Once I lock the door, I make my way over to his desk.

"Absolutely Benson, I think we need to start from scratch," he says as I straddle his lap, "No…. there is no need for redundancy. We need to throw that out immediately."

I notice quickly that his hair is shorter and I shake my head. "Who cut your hair?" I whisper into his ear, "Are you seeing another hairdresser behind my back?"

He snickers quietly and nods his head. "Serena," he whispers.

Serena saw Christian over the Holidays and didn't tell me? That whore. My first day back to work is today, and I haven't seen Serena yet. She is going to pay for seeing my man behind my back. I am the only one allowed to have an affair with him.

"That bitch is going to pay," I joke as I begin lifting off my shirt. His eyes settle on my lace guarded breasts and I smile with satisfaction over his reaction.

"Yes Benson…. We need to find the most attractive offer…. We can't settle for the only one that gives us attention…."

I jump off his lap and pull down my jeans. I kick them across the room and turn around so my back is to his front. I begin moving my behind on his crotch, giving the best lap dance I can come up with. I feel him begin to harden and suddenly, his hands are on my breasts, pulling me closer to him. He bites my ear lobe and I can't help the moan that escapes my lips.

"Benson, I've gotta go…. an attractive offer just walked in and I need to attend to it immediately."

He hangs up and holds me tighter with his other arm. "You are a sight for sore eyes, Miss Steele," he growls in my ear, "I've missed you."

"It seems that you haven't missed me," I pout, "Seeing Serena behind my back… How dare you?"

He laughs. "Serena informed me that you two are good friends," he points out as he slips his hand into my panties, "I didn't think you'd mind."

"Make it up to me by getting naked," I tease as absorb the feeling of his fingers inside me, "Oh god baby that feels good."

"You naked first," he says as his voice gets husky. He snaps open my bra and I moan appreciatively at the feeling of his hands on my breasts. "You're so beautiful," he breathes as I reach for his fly, "Fuck. Ana…. I've missed you."

I pull down his pants, and reach for what I'm looking for. I hold his thick erection in my hand and I tease the tip with my tongue. He growls with approval, and that spurs me on to take him deeper.

He pulls at my arms and I sit up and look at him. "Kiss me," he breathes out heavily. I smash my lips to his and he holds me tight. As our lips move, I feel it. I feel the heat, and the chemistry, and the wanting – everything I feel for him all wrapped up into one smoldering kiss.

We break apart and his eyes blaze into mine. "I'm about to tear you apart…. So I need to move you to a safer location."

I laugh, "Where are you moving me…."

He smiles and picks me up. I wrap my legs around his midsection and he carries me through his office and to another door. We walk through and I am in shock to find a bedroom connected to his office.

"What the hell?" I laugh as he plops me down on the bed.

"I use it for emergencies," he tells me as he begins undressing, "And this definitely constitutes as an emergency."

He throws his off shirt, and slips his pants down to the floor. He hovers over me and licks his lips as his grey eyes roam my naked body. He caresses my face and I feel a shiver of pleasure roll over me, and I feel nothing but love for this man. He kisses me, and I feel fire as his skin meets mine. He sinks deep inside of me and I practically convulse at the feeling.

He moves faster, his perfect body hovering over mine. I reach down to grab his ass to spur him on, but he stops me. "No baby," he chastises softly, "Slow. I want to feel you."

When we come, we hold tight to each other, both of us screaming in ecstasy.

**The food is spread across the bed, and we're both covered by our tangled bed sheets. **We sit in silence as we eat, enjoying the company of each other's presence. Through our nine year history, we've never been able to just have a calm and simple conversation. I like this. I like this a lot.

"I got you a Christmas present," he says as he staggers out of bed. I get a view of his beautiful back side as he walks over to a nearby desk.

"You didn't have to do that," I tell him, still admiring his beautiful ass, "I didn't get you anything."

"You bought the food," he says with a shrug, "But I am paying you back for that…. So maybe that doesn't count."

I laugh, "What did you get me?"

He walks over with a Tiffany's box and my jaw drops. "You didn't have to do that."

"Don't say stupid things," he snorts, "Open it baby."

I take off the ribbon and slip off the top. I want to cry when I see the simple silver necklace with a small, but perfect, diamond in the middle.

"Christian," I breathe, "You didn't have to do that…."

He shakes his head at me, and pulls the small necklace out of the box. He carefully places it around my neck and kisses my naked back.

"Perfection needs to be with perfection," he whispers in my ear.

"What a line," I snort, "But thank you. It's beautiful."

"Good," he says with a satisfied nod, "I should have gotten you something school related since you'll be starting next week."

Shit. I haven't told him about my change of plans. Well, Eddie and I's change of plans. He is going to flip out.

"Actually," I say softly, "Eddie asked the school if I could start in August."

His expression goes from calm to murderous in seconds. "What?"

"We're getting married in June. It just makes more sense for me to start in August…."

He gets up and walks across the room, shaking his head. "He forced you into that decision," he spits out.

"Yeah," I say honestly, "But …. It does make a lot of sense."

He continues shaking his head, trying to control his emotions. "I hate him," he finally says, "I hate that he just makes decisions like that for you without even listening to what you want. Do you want to start school in January?"

"Yes," I whisper.

"Then you should be able to start school when you want to start school," he says to himself, "He doesn't understand what he has."

I try to hold back tears, and fail miserably. He takes a seat back on the bed and squeezes my hand. "Sorry…. I don't want to upset you."

"It's fine."

"No it's not…."

We sit in silence for a bit longer and he eventually leans over for a tender kiss. I hold his face to mine, needing the comfort of him next to me. Our kiss deepens and he slowly moves me down to the bed. He pins me and I reach for him, pumping his semi-erect cock back to life.

"Again?" he chokes out between soft kisses.

"Hell yeah…." I breathe, "Again."

**"I'm sorry Serena, but I can't come back to work," I say, unconvincingly, "I'm sick."**

"Cough baby," he whispers in my ear. We've spent the entire afternoon having sex, and considering I only have two appointments scheduled today – I think I need to spend most of my day in bed with Christian.

"Seriously?" Serena laughs, "Oh girl, you aren't convincing anybody…. Say hey to Eddie for me."

"Sure," I nod, feeling like the world's worst person. "By the way…. Did you cut Christian's hair without telling me?"

I put Serena on speakerphone and smile at Christian. He shakes his head and tries not to laugh at me.

Serena laughs, "Leighton came in and asked if I could fit Christian in too….."

"Oh my god, Christian has a girlfriend to schedule him haircuts," I joke with Serena, "How fucking lame."

He smirks but says nothing. "Fine, if you want to play hooky so you can have tons and tons of sex with your fiancé, then fine. Whatever. But if there is hair, I will cut it Steele, so don't chastise me on making money from cutting a billionaire's hair."

Christian's face turns hard, and I know it has nothing to do with the Billionaire comment. He doesn't like the idea of me having sex with Eddie any more then I like the idea of him having sex with Leighton.

"Thanks Serena," I say, needing to quickly end this conversation, "Bye."

I hang up and kiss Christian's neck. "Round 4?" I ask, "Or is it Round 5? Don't you have work you need to be doing."

"I told Andrea that I am leaving for the afternoon, and I have a back exit. No one knows we're back here…."

"Thank God," I giggle. He smiles and I am relieved to see his good humor return. He pins me back down to the bed, and makes love to me for the fourth…. I mean fifth time today.

**Our day in bed unfortunately has to end. **I need to pick Ted up from school soon, and Christian probably needs to get back to work. Neither of us speaks about the elephant in the room. We both get equally upset when we mention Eddie or Leighton, but neither of us has made any moves to fix our current situation. We both still continue to cheat, sneaking around behind our partner's backs.

I wish I knew what he was thinking. I wish I understood why he continues to keep Leighton around. I am not judging him, considering I haven't dropped Eddie yet, but I don't get why he is still with her. He told me earlier that he has spent a lot of late nights in his office bedroom, and I know he must be trying to avoid Leighton at all costs. I just don't get it.

As for me and my reasoning for carrying on with our affair, I guess I keep thinking I'll get Christian out of my system eventually. _"One last time and I'll be done with him" -_ of course it never turns out that way. The more we're together intimately, the more I want him again. Every time I look at my son, I see the family I could have with him and his father. I love Eddie. I really love Eddie, but I am not sure if I'll be ever as irrevocably in love with Eddie as I am with Christian.

As Christian escorts me to my car, I get a call from Eddie. Eddie has tried to call me several times this afternoon so I unfortunately will have to take this call with Christian around. I can't let Eddie go to voicemail again.

"Hey babe," I say, turning to Christian with an apologetic look.

"Hey where have you been all afternoon?"

"I haven't felt good so I took a nap," I lie, "Sorry, I've missed your call."

"Shit Ana…. Are you ok?"

"Yeah," I say, hopefully brushing off his concern, "What is up?"

"Ok, I don't want you to get stressed…. But I had a friend call in a favor for me, and I have the perfect venue for our wedding."

"I thought we already had a place…."

"Well, you said you wanted an outdoor wedding," he says, unable to hold back his excitement, "And I found us an outdoor venue. I have a few guys working on it. It's going to be perfect."

"Wow…. That's great," I say, turning to look at Christian. He is looking straight ahead, avoiding any glances my direction.

"But…. It's on a construction site…. Trust me, it's much better than it sounds," He continues, "And we'll have to get married in March."

I stop in my tracks, "March." Christian stops too, and I see his anger burning across his face.

"I talked to the printers," Eddie says as Christian finally turns to face me, "They can change the invitations. We already have the flowers, and I already have people hired to set up the wedding. We have caterers and a cake. The reception is at my mom's house, and she already has her old lady friends ready to set up…. All we need are tuxes and bridesmaids dresses, and your dress…."

"March," I breath.

I hear Eddie's smile as he speaks. "This March…. you will be Mrs. Edward Jiotti."

** I can't go home right. **I can't deal with Eddie and how happy he is. I feel like I am suffocating, and I'll never be able to breathe again.I can't do this anymore; I am going to lose it. I need to talk to somebody. I don't need my mother or a shrink – I need my best friend.

"Hello?" I hear Macy's small voice through the phone.

"I'm having an affair with Christian…." I blurt out all in one breath, "Can I come over? I need to desperately talk about this."

"Oh Ana," she huffs, "Come on over…. Come on over and you can tell me everything."

**Christian **

** March…. Ana is getting married in fucking March. **I almost explode as I walk back through my apartment. She can't marry him. I thought I had more time to convince her to not go through with this. Who am I fucking kidding? She isn't going to leave him. He convinced her to wait till August for college, and now she is agreeing with no questions asked to their March wedding. I hate that douchebag.

"Hey Christian," Leighton yells as I enter our bathroom, "I am going to take a shower, and then we can order food…."

"Kay," I yell back at her, too angry to care. I decide that I need a round with the punching bag in my home gym. It won't completely calm me down, but at least I won't be stewing in my own anger.

"Hey Christian," Leighton yells back out, "If you go downstairs…. Can you take my phone with you? My boss is supposed to call me about my raise."

What raise? She never told me about a fucking raise. "Okay," I yell back as I quickly change clothes. I grab her phone and move to the staircase that separates the penthouse from my gym. As I walk through the door, Leighton's phone begins to ring.

"Hello," I snap as I pick up.

"Oh…. Hello. Is Miss Miller there?"

"No," I bite out, "This is her boyfriend…. Can I help you?"

"Yes…. This is Dr. Keller's office. We we're just calling because Leighton has missed her last three shot appointments and she hasn't contacted us at all."

I snap out of my rage haze, and focus on the conversation. "Shot?"

"Yes, her birth control shot….. "

I almost slam her phone back to the ground. "Her birth control shot? So does this mean…."

"She could be pregnant…. Yes sir."

I throw her phone across the room, and head back upstairs to my bedroom. I have a lot of things in my life that I can't control right now, but my conniving soon to be ex-girlfriend is someone I definitely can put in her place.

**A/N – DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU DO NOT WANT SPOILERS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!**

**Trust me when I say that this is NOT what you're probably thinking. Trust me! It will all be OK! Don't freak out and tell me you're done….. if you leave, you'll miss some crazy good shit. Lol. I hope you liked…. I don't own FSOG. Please review! **


	15. Get to the point

**A/N – THANK YOU for all of the wonderful responses for my last chapter. I won't be able to post again till Sunday so I decided to post tonight! Enjoy and thank you for reading – keep the reviews coming! :-)**

**Chapter 15 – Get to the point **

**Ana**

** After an hour of talking and three glasses of wine, Macy officially knows everything about my affair with Christian**. She doesn't seem as shocked as I thought she'd be, but she does seem concerned. I feel a lot better than I did before I called her. It's good that someone else knows, and this secret isn't stewing inside of me anymore.

"So what are you going to do?" Macy asks as she pours me another glass of wine, "Eddie moving up the wedding definitely complicates things."

"It does," I tell her, "And I feel like an even bigger asshole because he has taken care of everything wedding related. I have done nothing except for make a few phone calls…."

She takes in a deep breath, "Do you think he knows that on some level that you aren't into this…."

"I don't know," I say, shaking my head.

"Because he was so insistent that you start school after you get married, he keeps moving up the wedding – next thing I know, you two will get married next week, and he has done all the work….."

"I already feel like an ass…."

"He wants to keep you, and he'll do anything to make that happen," Macy mutters to herself, "What do you want?"

I snicker nervously because I have no idea how to answer that question. "Do you have a week for us to debate this?"

She leans over and grabs my hand, "What do you want?"

"I love Eddie," I tell her, "He was there for me when I was at my lowest point with Christian. He has loved me for three years unconditionally. He is so good with Ted…. I love him."

"So when you justify staying with him….. do you run that reel through your brain over and over again until you've convinced yourself that Eddie is the right choice?"

I laugh at how true her words are. "Yes."

"People grow apart Ana…." She says with a sad smile, "It happened to you and Christian."

"I just never expected that we'd grow back together…." I say softly, "As much as I am going to hate every minute of hurting Eddie…. The feeling of rediscovering us… Christian and Me…. What we used to be…. I have never felt more alive. I feel like I am seventeen again, but this time around…. I'm much smarter. Or at least I think I'm much smarter."

"That could be the affair talking," Macy points out, "People always say that shit is a rush…."

I shake my head adamantly, "Those idiots are crazy. Affairs are not a rush. Affairs are like eating ice cream. You eat it and you love it and then when you're done…. You are filled with nothing but guilt and it sucked the fun out of eating the damn thing in the first place…."

Macy looks horrified. "You obviously aren't eating ice cream the right way..."

I groan. "What do I do Macy Kavanagh?"

"You need to pick a path, Anastasia Steele," she counters back, "Do you decide on a new life…. The one with Eddie and the new family you'll make with him… or do you give the new and improved and drug free Christian a second shot. To me…. It sounds like you love Eddie, but you've sampled the newly wrapped Christian Grey and you like what you see."

"Do you think Eddie would still want me after what I did to him?" I ask honestly. My greatest fear is that I am left with nobody.

"He was so insistent that you guys get married in March….," she says with a shrug, "If you beg and plead and show him that you're really dedicated… he may give you another shot. Stranger things have happened."

She gives kiss on the forehead. "But….. On the other hand…. It would be great for Ted to have his father back all the time," I tell her.

"But that shouldn't drive your decision….." she points out, "It's good, but you need to be happy at the end of all of this…. no matter what happens."

"I just don't want to make the wrong decision."

"You killed yourself all those years ago when you left Christian," Macy reminds me, "Don't do that again to yourself. Just decide."

"It's hard…. No matter what happens…. I hurt somebody."

"When you started sleeping with Christian…. You already hurt Eddie, Ana…. So the fact that this is driving you is irrelevant. Pick what you want and apologize later."

I take a deep breath and hug my best friend. I have to make a hard decision and it's going to kill me, but it could also be the best thing to ever happen. I refuse to think of the possible disaster and I hope and pray for a happily ever after.

**Christian **

** I walk back into my bedroom as Leighton finishes up her shower. **I think back over the past several months, and pray that I have covered my tracks. She can't have my kid. This fucking asinine situation has decided it for me; I can't have a child with her. Leighton has talked about children a lot and I usually just brushed off the thought thinking we had time for that. Now, that this might be a true possibility, I don't want this.

She walks back into the bedroom, and I point to the chair in front of me. "Sit," I snap.

"What's wrong?" she asks innocently.

"Sit now," I demand a second time, "I won't ask you a third time."

Thank God she isn't in a towel right now. I don't think I could take her feeble attempts at trying to seduce me. She sits and I throw her phone at her.

"I got a call from your gynecologist," I snap, "And all I can say is… what the ever loving fuck is wrong with you?"

"What do you mean," she asks, scrambling to check her missed calls.

"You know exactly what I mean, Leighton…" I bite out, "What the fuck were you thinking? Why haven't you been taking your shots?"

She is on the verge of tears and I might lose my shit."I love you," she chokes out, "I thought you'd fight me on this…. And I wanted a baby with you. I wanted a baby with you so bad."

"This isn't you," I interrupt her with a scream, "You aren't the lying and conniving bitch. That's never been you. I don't understand why you did this. Why you would do something so manipulative and disgusting?"

"I'm sorry," she cries into her hands, "I don't think I'm pregnant. It's fine. I can fix this. I can fix us. I'm sorry baby…. I'm so sorry."

I'm disgusted and I can't even look at her. I don't want to fix this. She used to be my salvation, and now she has turned out like the rest of them. I thought she was different, and I cannot believe I wasted two years with her. The words release from my mouth before I realize what I am saying.

"I've been sleeping with Ana…."

Her crying morphs into pure astonishment. Her jaw drops open and I stand back to wait for the fall out. "You…. Slept with her?"

"Multiple times," I add, wanting to hurt her for the damage she has caused.

"That's why you wanted to wear a condom the last time we…." She bites out, "Oh my god…. I'm such an idiot."

I see her begin to understand and put together the missing pieces of the last few months. I feel free. I feel like a weight has lifted off my shoulders. I hated hurting a good person up until her recent revelation. Now, all bets are off. She fucked with me, and karma is a bitch.

"Do you want her?" she asks with a sob, "Was I always just her replacement? Is she actually going to leave Eddie for you? She probably won't…."

I'm so done with her. I can't even answer her question without laughing at her.

"Get the fuck out of my apartment before I call the cops."

**Ana**

** As I drive home, I fear the worst. **I need to tell him, but I am terrified out of my mind. At the end of the day, I love him and I hate what I did to him. Tonight, I am just going to tell him about the affair and leave it at that, and he'll probably throw my ass to the curb.

When I pull up the drive, I see several cars. I recognize my mother's and I know she must have dropped Ted off with Eddie. Ted is another issue, but I guess I need to see how this plays out before he is told anything concrete. God, this is a mess.

I walk inside my home, and I am shocked to see Eddie's mother, my mother, and Eddie's aunt in the living room. Eddie is sitting next to his mom, and Ted is sitting with my mother. Ted's sweet face lights up when he sees me.

"Mommy!" he yells happily as he runs for me.

"Hi baby boy," I say as I hug my son, "I love you. How was school…. Thanks for picking him up Mom….. I needed some time with Macy."

"No problem," Mom says with a wave.

"It was good," he says with a shrug.

"Just good?"

"They have a bunch of dresses for you," Ted says pointing to several garment bags, "I told them you'll probably be too tired to try them on."

They women laugh. "He's such a sweet young man," Eddie's aunt comments, "You've raised a good boy."

"I did the best I could do," I say anxiously turning to my mother, "Those are wedding dresses?"

"Yes," Mom says as she walks over to me, "I picked them up from Annie Reeves…. I think they'll look amazing on you. Try them on. We want to give our opinions."

I look anxiously around the room, and Eddie gives me an encouraging nod. I smile at my Mom and she happily picks up a garment bag for me. She pushes me upstairs and I try my hardest not to have a panic attack.

**I remember this feeling well, I've experienced it before. **My Mom signed me up for dance class when I was seven, and I remember hating every minute of it. She dressed me up in a ridiculous cow girl costume and I walked around and pretended like I knew how to dance. I was a fraud, a complete phony. This is the same exact situation, and I feel like I'm going to be sick.

"Oh honey," Mom says as she admires my first option. It's a long, crème A-Line gown with itchy beaded shoulders. I look good but I hate how I look all at the same time. "You look beautiful," she beams, "Eddie's Mom and Aunt and Ted are all waiting for you. Eddie has agreed to step out of the room while you model the dresses I picked out….."

I shrink into the chair in front of me and burst into tears. "Mom….." I sob, "I can't marry him."

"Honey, that's just cold feet. You love Eddie and he loves you…. You're so lucky to have found each other…."

"No Mom," I say, trying to wipe my tears away, "It's something else…. Something has happened."

She freezes and shakes her head. "What did Christian do now….."

** My Mom told my waiting audience that I wasn't feeling too well, and that I needed to get to bed. **Eddie was concerned of course, but I was able to keep him at an arm's length the rest of the night. I needed sleep before any conversation with any human life form could happen.

He debated with me about going to work this morning, but I already missed half of yesterday due to my sexual escapades with Christian. I vehemently told Eddie no. I need work today. I need to take my mind off of everything.

The morning went by way too quickly. I've had a lot of customers, and work has helped me take my mind off my problems. That's part of the reason I have always loved this job so much, it's a good distraction. Now that lunch is over, my day continues to be insane, and nobody in this salon has had a moment to stop and breath.

"Hey Leighton," Serena yells across the room, "You need to schedule an appointment?" I turn to the front in shock. Leighton Miller is standing at reception with a jacket around her slim body and a pair of sunglasses firmly planted on her head.

"Actually," she says, pointing to me, "I just need to talk to that whore about a few things."

I practically drop my scissors, and my customer's mouth flies open in shock. The whole salon has stopped their movements, and Serena looks like she might kill Leighton. Suddenly, it occurs to me. She knows. Fuck.

"Leighton, that's not appropriate behavior for this salon….."

"I'm sorry, Serena," she says angrily, "That bitch has been fucking my boyfriend for months so excuse me for not being Mary Fucking Poppins."

There is a collective gasp across the room and I know my face is red. Every eye is on me, and I can't look at any of them. "I'm sorry to interrupt your appointment, you bitch whore," Leighton snaps, "But we need to have a conversation…. Right fucking now."

I look down at the terrified girl in my chair. She nods and I point Leighton to the back. She walks through and I follow behind her.

"Call us if you need back up," Talia yells as I shut the door behind me.

Leighton takes a seat, but I chose to stand next to the door, for safety purposes. She sneers at me. "I should have known this would happen…," she says, shaking her head, "I'm such an idiot to have trusted him like that…."

"Is there a reason you wanted to talk to me," I say softly, wanting to get this over with as fast as possible.

"I was going to come here, make a big fuss, and try to fight you," she begins, throwing her hair back, "But then I began to think….. What can I do to make you feel helpless?"

"Helpless?" I question.

"You took away the man I loved," she snaps at me angrily, "I am alone and I have lost the love of my life because you couldn't get your whore hands away from him….."

I shake my head, "Get to the point."

"After this appointment, you are going to drive me to Eddie's construction site and you are going to tell him EXACTLY what you did behind his back. You are going to give him every little fucking detail. I have pictures to accompany your little confession so we can make this just a nice little trip…."

"Pictures?" I ask in disbelief.

"Turns out…. You two weren't as secretive as either of you thought, and Christian's employees aren't as fond of him as he probably expects…."

"This is ridiculous," I laugh.

"If you don't go…. then I'll go down there by myself, and I will tell him everything. I know more than you would expect, and I can get quite loquacious when I want to…. I have two sets of photos. If you don't go, he gets both."

We sit in silence, and I try to decide if she is lying about the pictures. Christian would have had to tell her last night about the affair, and there is no way she would know all of this by now AND have pictures to prove it. She is lying about something, but I have no way to prove my theory.

"Go…." Leighton says impatiently, pointing for the door, "I'll wait here for you. I'm not a patient person…."


	16. The Cut

**A/N – So remember that time I said I'd update again on Sunday. Well, situations changed…. I got some extra time. Here you go. This means I might not be able to update on Sunday, but some of you might not care. Lol. Enjoy! Let me know what you think, and thank you for your awesome reviews from the last chapter. **

**Chapter 16 – The Cut **

**Ana**

** I walk out of the back room and focus my attention back to my terrified client.** I give her a reassuring smile, and she smiles back anxiously. I hope I didn't just lose a client because of Christian's psycho ex.

It takes me a second to realize that the salon is quiet and everyone is staring at me. The salon is never quiet. I feel like a freak of nature, and I want to get this appointment over with. I want to get this whole situation over with.

Serena stares at me from her station and gestures to the back room. Leighton is still back there and she wants to know why. I move over to my phone, and send Serena a quick text message detailing what happened. I set it back down and begin trimming my client's hair.

"Oh, HELL NO," I hear Serena scream from across the room. I turn around and Serena quickly reaches for my hand.

"I'm so sorry, Tara," Serena says to my client, "But we've got to fix this."

Serena drags me to the back and I follow behind her. I am too shocked to even begin to ask what Serena is doing. We both walk through the door at the same time and Serena slams the door behind her.

"Alright Leighton," Serena bites out as she stands over her, "I don't know what you're trying to prove by forcing Ana to confront Eddie in the middle of her work day, but you and I both know that this is bullshit."

"Stay out of this Serena," Leighton says, rolling her eyes.

"No, bitch – I'm not staying out of this," Serena snaps, "You are going to let Ana finish her day, and she is going to tell Eddie tonight in the privacy of their own home. If she doesn't do that, then you can fly those pictures like a flag…. If you actually have them…."

"I do have them," Leighton corrects her.

"Oh really?" Serena asks, cackling, "Where are they?"

Leighton's eyes blaze into Serena. "I have an informant who has a digital copy available…."

Serena bursts into laughter, and I cannot help my smile either. "So you've got nothing," Serena laughs, "Here is how this is going to go. You're going to get the fuck out of my salon. Ana is going to tell Eddie everything this evening in the privacy of her own home. If she doesn't do it, I'll drag those pictures around the city myself….. do we have ourselves a deal? And really, we should have a deal because I can have you arrested for disturbing my place of business…."

Leighton doesn't look impressed but she doesn't say anything else in response. She stands up and walks back out on to the floor of the salon without another word. Serena turns to me and nods to the front.

"I think that new girl doesn't have a client…. She can work with the girl you have. Take a breather, and maybe call Christian and ask him why the fuck he didn't warn you about Hurricane Leighton…."

Serena leaves me and I decide to go straight to my car. My phone is still out there, and I need to talk to Christian desperately. Now that she is out of the building, I really want to know what happened between Christian and Leighton. He obviously ended things, and they obviously didn't go so well.

I take a seat and pull out of the parking lot. I'll drive to Starbucks and talk to Christian on speaker phone on the way. Christian picks up on the third ring.

"Jesus Christ, I've been meaning to call you all damn day…."

I snicker to myself, "Yeah, it would have been nice for you to call me…. Especially with what I just dealt with."

He goes quiet on the other end. "Please tell me Leighton didn't come to your work…."

"Oh she did," I tell him, "And she told my whole salon that you and I have been sleeping together."

He takes in a deep exasperated breath, "Fuck. Ana. I'm so sorry…. I've been dealing with lawyers all fucking day. I should have called you."

"Lawyers?"

He laughs sardonically, "Oh I've got so much to tell you, it could take a year."

I can't help but smile. He sounds stressed, but I kind of love to hear him talk like this. He is sexy when he is agitated.

"What happened?" I ask as I drive.

"Well, Leighton is suing her doctor's office because they told me without her authorization that she hasn't been getting her birth control shots. I am hiring them a good lawyer as a thank you…."

There goes that warm and fuzzy feeling right out the window. "Are you kidding me?" I gasp, "Christian…. Is she?"

"That's another reason why I need a lawyer…. I am going to force her to take a pregnancy test."

"Can you do that?" I ask.

"I'm going to try. I don't think she's pregnant. Leighton swears she isn't pregnant, but she also refuses to take a test just to be a bitch…."

I feel a hollow pit in my stomach. I don't want him to father any of her spawn. He just can't.

"What else do you have?" I ask him, forcing out my words. I sound so small right now.

"Ana," he says calmly, "It will be fine either way. Don't have a panic attack."

"I have a lot to panic about," I say meekly, "She came into the salon, screaming like a psycho path and scaring away my customers. While she was there….. she said she had proof of our affair and she was using the threat of those photos to get me to spill everything to Eddie. Apparently she has lots and lots of pictures of us."

There is no sound on the other end of the phone. "Pictures?"

"She has digital copies…," I inform him, "She says she got it from one of your employees…."

"Awesome," he groans, "Let me find lawyer number three…."

"She wanted me to leave the salon after my appointment and find Eddie and tell him at work," I continue, "But Serena came in and convinced her that I should do it after work. She'll send them to everyone if I don't do it…."

"Fuck," he snaps, "Time to get lawyer number four and lawyer number five."

"Christian," I blurt out, "I am telling him tonight. I'm telling him everything."

He takes in a deep breath, "What are you going to do? How are you going to tell him?"

I shrug, "I'll start with the truth, I guess. I don't know. What else goes into a confession of infidelity?"

"Are you telling him that you're leaving him for me?" he asks softly.

"Can I be honest with you?" I ask him as I pull over into the Starbucks parking lot, "I really don't know what to tell him. He's been a part of my life for three years, and despite what has gone on – he is still special to me."

I hear his breathing become ragged on the other end, and I want to desperately take away his pain. Tears spill down my face, and it's not because I'm afraid of losing him – it's because I hate what this is doing to him. He has been nothing but supportive and wonderful, and I need this to finish fast before I hurt him any further.

"But," I say through my tears, "I don't think I'll ever love anyone the way I love you."

I hear his smile in his voice. "Back at you baby…"

**Christian sent me a text message on my way home from the salon that said, "Call me if you need me tonight, I love you." **

I didn't reply back, because I wasn't sure what to say. I picked up Ted from school on my way home and Eddie texted me to tell me he was home early. I shake my head, of all the nights for him to be home early. When I pull up to the driveway, I turn and talk to my son.

"Mommy has to talk to Eddie about something important…. Are you ok sitting down and watching a movie until we're done?"

I feel terrible for doing this, but my Mom is busy tonight. I can't tell Kate any details because of Eddie's friendship with her husband Gavin, and Macy is out of town. I would ask Christian to watch Ted, but I feel weird about having him do that tonight.

He nods, "Ok Mommy."

I help Ted out of the car, and I hold him tight as we walk inside. I quickly find Ted a movie once we're in his room, and kiss him on the forehead. Ted's eyebrows furrow.

"Are you ok Mommy?" he asks, "You seem weird."

"I'm weird?"

He shakes his head and giggles, "No… I didn't mean that."

"I'm fine baby boy," I say with another kiss, "I'll be back soon. Enjoy your movie."

I walk downstairs and Eddie is sitting at the kitchen counter, reading a cook book intently. "What are you doing?" I try to ask him calmly. I feel anything but calm.

He looks up at me and smiles, "Since I got home early, I wanted to cook you and Ted dinner, but…. I may just call my mother."

"I love your Mom, but I'd prefer not to spend the evening with her," I mutter as he smirks.

"Good point," he says as he pulls me forward, "Did you sit Ted down in front of a movie?" He steps forward and I know what he is expecting. Under normal situations, putting a movie on for Ted is usually a cue for Eddie that I want to have sex. Only on rare occasions does it mean that we need to talk. I move away from him and take my distance.

"We need to talk…."

He nods nervously and takes a seat. "What do you need to talk about?"

This is it. This is the moment, and I try my hardest to form the right words. I open my mouth, and the words slide out.

"I can't marry you…."

His face morphs from confusion to shock. "What?" he asks in surprise, "What do you mean you can't marry me?"

I shake my head, "Eddie…. I don't want this. My heart hasn't been in this, and I can't go through with this…."

He shakes his head. "I don't understand? Why have we been together for three years if you don't want to marry me?"

I shrug my shoulders, "I've loved you this whole time…."

"And so we should get married," he spits out with anger, "This is because of him…. Isn't it?" I don't know how to answer that. He grunts in anger and walks into the living room. "Answer me," he barks.

"I've been sleeping with him," I blurt out. I can't look at him and I keep my eyes to the ground. "I'm sorry for everything," I choke out, "I don't know what else to say…."

"I know you've been sleeping with him."

I turn my eyes from my feet to Eddie. He has my attention. "What?" I gasp.

"I've known for a while," he says softly, his eyes sad.

"How?" is all I am able to blurt out.

He shakes his head, "You started leaving for long periods of time. You've been getting more and more distant from me. Before the Christmas holidays, I finally had you followed."

My jaw drops, "Why didn't you say anything."

He smiles sadly, "I wanted to. I wanted to kill him for this….. but then I thought long and hard about what I should do. What would happen if I told you. I didn't want to lose you. So…. I decided that rushing things might be my best option."

"Why?" I ask, still confused by his admission. I don't feel good about this at all.

"Because, I know you…. You probably felt guilty about cheating, and if I rushed our waiting time so you'd be married to me sooner – you wouldn't go that far once you were married to me. I would have you, and your little affair with Christian would be a distant memory. You would never do something like that once you were married to me…. You're too good for crap like that."

"So you moved up the wedding in order to…. Keep me?"

I don't know how I feel about his confession. Not that I can judge him based off how I have acted with Christian, but this doesn't seem right. Something seems off. I get a bad feeling at the pit of my stomach.

He nods, "It was."

"I don't like this," I admit, "I don't like it at all."

"Ana," he says, grabbing my hands, "Let's go…. right now. Let's go to Vegas and get married. I'll forget this happened…. We can start fresh."

This feels so wrong. I don't want this. I can't do this. "I can't forget what happened," I tell him, shaking my head, "I can't forget."

"Ana," he shakes his head adamantly, "You have this connection to him only because of Ted. That's it. You're an adult, and you two are different now…. You only think you want him because of Ted."

"Then why does the thought of being married to you fill me with dread…."

In a split second, I see his hand go back and then I feel the snap of my skin as he makes contact with my face. His hand falls to his side, and then I see his face turn from anger to pure horror. I feel something wet on my lip, and I reach to dab it.

Blood.

He must have cut me somehow.

"Ana…. I'm so sorry," he breathes deeply as tears flood his eyes. I've never seen Eddie cry before. I turn around and head for the bathroom. He follows behind, silently sobbing as I check on my lip. I walk into the bathroom and slam the door in his face.

"Ana…. Please baby, I'm so sorry. That won't ever happen again…. I don't hit women…. My Mom would be fucking ashamed of me right now…."

I ignore him and try to stop the blood slowly dripping out of my lip. I hold down the washcloth, silently praying for the pressure to stop the blood. I don't want to be in this house any longer then I need to be. Once I am satisfied, I walk out of the bathroom and up the stairs to get my son.

"Ana, please," Eddie pleads, crying loudly, "Don't do this… I love you. We both made mistakes, we can make this right."

I stop and shake my head at him. "This mistake can't be made right. I don't want to marry you, and that's the end of it."

"No," he sobs, grabbing for my hand. I pull away.

"Don't fucking touch me."

I walk the rest of the way to Ted's room. I open the door and he bolts up. "Come on baby," I say, grabbing for his hand, "We're going to see Daddy."

He jumps off his bed, "Do I need to take any clothes?"

I shake my head, "Daddy has plenty of stuff at his place."

He looks up and reaches for my lip. "Mommy…. What happened to your lip?"

I cover it up. "Nothing baby…. let's go. Let me carry you to the car." He is eight, but he still is small enough for me to carry him. He wraps his arms around me, and I whisper in his ear.

"I love you…. Eddie might not be in the best mood right now, just ignore him baby…. he doesn't mean any of what he is saying right now."

He nods, his eyes still full of concern. I walk downstairs with Ted in my arms, and I notice Eddie isn't anywhere to be seen. I grab my keys and my purse and I walk out of the house quickly. I stop when I see Eddie standing at my car, and I rush past him.

"Don't leave…." He pleads again, "We can work this out."

"I'm done," I tell him, trying to open my door. He closes the door as I try to open it and I take a step back.

"You can't leave until we try to work this out."

Ted lifts his head up and scowls. "I'll call my Dad, and he'll come down here and beat you up if you don't let my Mom go."

I smile with pride. He is his father's son. I give Eddie another scowl and he steps out of the way. I secure Ted in the car and rush to the driver side. I feel a rush of relief pour through me as I pull out of the driveway.

I am going exactly where I need to go.

**Christian **

** "Ana and Teddy…. They're in the parking lot," Taylor repeats to me. **I don't know what this means, but I am in shock regardless. What are they doing here? I hope it's good…. Fucking hell, I hope it's really good. "Sawyer is walking them both up…."

I walk out of my office and head for the front door. I wish I could meet them downstairs, but I want to make sure they're secure and safe inside my penthouse. I wait in anticipation and when the elevator door opens, my heart leaps out of my chest.

"Daddy!" Ted cries as he jumps off his mother and races for me.

I kiss his head and hold my boy close. I pick him up and turn my attention to his mother. She looks tired, but I see bits of relief cross her face. Then I notice it. I set Ted down on the ground and hold Ana's face in my hands.

"It's ok," she whispers, "Don't freak out."

"What the fuck did he do?" I whisper, feeling anger radiate through me.

"Christian…."

The tone of her voice tells me everything. I am going to kill the bastard. I don't care if her news was bad, he doesn't hurt what belongs to me.

"No," I hiss, "That asshole needs to be taught a lesson."

She wraps her arms around my neck and kisses my cheek. Her lips move to mine and I am all hers.

"Just stay with me…. I need you. Don't leave," she says against my lips.

I hold her closer and I inhale her perfect scent. I want to kill him, but I won't because I don't want to leave her.

"Are you mine?" I ask.

She nods and smiles, "If you'll have me…."


	17. To Honor and Protect

**A/N – Wow! Thank you for all the great reviews from the last chapter! Hope you enjoy my new update! I don't own FSOG! And please keep those great reviews coming! **

**Chapter 17 – To Honor and Protect **

**Almost Eight Years Earlier **

**Ana**

** "Mr. Grey," I hear Mrs. Daugherty say from down the hallway, "Please get off Miss Steele. She has to get to my class, and you have to get to yours." **

We stop kissing, and Christian turns to stare at Mrs. Daugherty. She shakes her head and laughs. "Don't look at me like that Mr. Grey…. She looks like that to begin with BECAUSE you couldn't keep your grubby paws off her."

Christian cups my belly and leaves me a kiss on the cheek. "Don't get mad at her," I tease him, "She is five months pregnant and even though I'm eight months…. She still understands my pain."

He grabs my hand without a word and walks me down the hall. Our third period English classes are across the hall from each other. Christian shakes his head at Mrs. Daugherty.

"I'll take your teasing Daugherty….. Just take care of my girl and my little boy while they're in your class."

She smiles affectionately at Christian and I can't help but smile with her. He is so damn sweet. "Don't worry, Mr. Grey. I've got them covered."

**Being nearly eight months pregnant and a high school student is definitely not easy. **Normal women would get maternity leave, but I don't have time to stop. I need to make sure I pass my classes, and ace my finals so I can give birth and graduate without worry. It's not easy to accomplish, I am so uncomfortable all the time. For my comfort, Mrs. Daugherty moved a table into her classroom with my own padded chair, but I still feel terrible.

"What are the major themes of the Scarlett Letter?"

"How you doing?" Macy whispers across the table. I nod but am too agitated and uncomfortable respond.

"You know, Mrs. Daugherty," Mason Ross says as he raises his hand, "We've got our very own Hester Prynne at this school and in our class."

My eyes go straight to Mason as he looks directly at me. He is an asshole and I have a bad feeling as to where this is leading. I see the girls in my class giving Mason the evil eye, so I know I have people on my side.

"Where are you going with this Ross?" Daugherty barks.

"I'm just saying that we have Ana who is seventeen and pregnant and that's a scandal for a small community like ours," the asshole continues, "We don't have many pregnant teens at our school…. That's more of a public school thing."

Right on cue, all of the girls angrily groan and grunt at Mason's jackassery. "Mason, shut up," Mindy Jacobs snaps at him.

"You're so gross," Tara Hall says as she throws a paper ball at your head, "No girl is going to ever touch you again for being such a douchebag…"

I hang my head and try not to look at anyone. I pray that everyone stops looking at me soon. This is so embarrassing.

"Those little comments are sending you straight to detention, Ross," Daugherty snaps, "And I expect you to apologize to Miss Steele."

"People call me a man whore all the time…. and I get judged for calling an actual whore a whore."

The bell rings and Daugherty immediately pulls out a referral for Mason to see the principal. The girls in my class smack him on the head as they exit and I am thankful for the support. Tara Hall reaches across the table with an empathetic smile.

"Don't listen to him. If I was pregnant, I would be on my ass doing nothing - you're a woman warrior."

"Thanks Tara," I whisper. Macy helps me up and we walk together out of class. When we turn the corner, my jaw drops. Christian has Mason pinned up against the locker and Mason's face is bright red.

"Wanna call somebody a whore? Call me a whore, Mother Fucker," Christian screams in his face, "Because if she's a whore, then I'm a whore. So call me a whore…. And see what the fuck happens to your face when you do."

"Let me go asshole…." He gruffs out, "Mrs. Daugherty, aren't you going to stop this jackass?"

I turn around to see Mrs. Daugherty turning to walk the other way. "You asked for that Ross…."

"You are going to apologize to my girl before I kick your ass," Christian snaps at him, "And I will kick it and you will go down like a house of cards mother fucker…."

"Mr. Grey," Principal Thompson's voice fills the hallway, "Unhand Mr. Ross and you both will come to my office now…."

Christian reluctantly lets Mason go, and I turn to Macy. "How did Christian find out about Mason's comments so fast?"

Macy shrugs, "I texted him…."

We follow the boys to the principal's office, and I hope Christian doesn't get expelled. We both need to graduate, and we don't need this drama at all.

**Christian – Present Day**

** I leave my sleeping girl to go check on my boy. **They're both here with me, and I fucking love it. Last night was rough for Ana, so I am going to let her sleep this morning. She doesn't work today, and I am glad that I'll be able to keep her at home. I have a few errands to run this morning, but I plan on spending the rest of the day with Ana.

I walk out into the kitchen to see my boy already eating breakfast. Gail is standing with him, smiling happily at my son. Ted turns around and smiles with a mouthful of food.

"Hey Dad…."

Gail snickers, "Swallow Ted." He swallows his food and I take a seat next to my son. "What do you want for breakfast, Mr. Grey?" she asks me.

"The same as my boy…." I say as she nods.

"How is Miss Steele doing this morning?" Gail asks with a knowing smile.

I smile back, "She is a little tired this morning so I am going to let her sleep."

"So I get to stay with both of you now?" Ted asks, "I don't have to go back and forth."

"You don't have to go back and forth," I reassure him. Gail and Ted both smile happily at the thought.

As we eat our breakfast together, I begin to think harder about last night. Ana and I didn't talk at all about what transpired between her and Eddie, and I am worried about that cut on her lip. It makes me worry about what Ted saw last night, and it pisses me off that Ted might have been exposed to something as disgusting as abuse to his own mother.

"Ted," I begin, "What do you remember about last night?"

Ted looks up at me and his brows furrow. "I watched a movie, and I could hear Mom and Eddie yelling downstairs." I nod as he talks and I try to keep my emotions in check. "Then Mom came and got me, and she had that cut on her lip."

"So you didn't see how she got that cut on her lip?" I ask him.

He shakes his head. "No…."

Thank fuck for that. "So what else happened?" I prompt him.

"Mom came and got me and we went to the car…. She told me that Eddie probably wasn't in a good mood and not to listen to him. Then when she tried to open the car door, he slammed it on her so I told him that he needed to let us go or I'd call you to come and beat him up…."

My jaw drops and Gail's smile widens. "You told Eddie that?"

Ted nods nervously. My poor boy probably thinks he is in trouble for what he said. Guilt is something he learned from his mother.

"Ted…," I say as I kiss his forehead, "I don't think I've ever been more proud of you then I am right now."

"Really?" Ted asks with shock in his voice.

"You did exactly what you were supposed to do," I tell him, "Thank you for taking care of your Mommy when I couldn't."

He nods happily, "I like protecting Mommy, she needs me. I love her."

I laugh as I kiss him again. "Yes she does and yes we do." Gail is tearing up, and I realize need to get Ted to school soon.

"Doesn't Ted need to go to school soon?" I hear Ana behind me.

I turn around to see Ana standing at the door of our bedroom. She is wearing a sweatshirt, pajama shorts, and her hair is thrown up into a messy bun and she is the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes on. She looks exhausted, but of course she still checks to see Ted is where he needs to be. She has always been super mom.

"I'm working on it," I tell her as she strides over to me.

"I love seeing my two favorite men together," she says, kissing me lightly on the lips.

"I am going to take Ted to school this morning and then I have a few errands to run," I say, kissing her on the side of the mouth and then gently kissing her lips, "Will you be ok staying at home until I can come back?"

"What errands do you have?" she asks skeptically.

"I'm a CEO, Miss Steele…. I have plenty of things I need to do," I tease her, "But I will be coming home to you as soon as I can."

She kisses me again, and Ted groans. "Can you guys not kiss while I'm eating?"

We both laugh. "Sorry buddy," Ana says as she smothers a kiss on his face, "I just love your Daddy so much…. I can't help it."

I grab his back pack and help him off the table. "Time for school buddy….. hug your Mommy goodbye."

Ted hops off and gives Ana a hug. I grab his hand and we walk to the door where Taylor is waiting. "Taylor," Ana asks, "Can you take Ted down to the car…. I need to talk to Christian for a second."

"Yes Miss Steele," Taylor says as he grabs Ted's hand. They walk out and she grabs my arm.

"What kind of errands are you running?" she asks with concern.

I can't tell her my plans. She'll lose it and try to stop me. I have to do this. There is no other option. "Ana…. Don't worry…."

"Don't hurt him…." She pleads, "Promise me you won't hurt him."

I kiss her before I turn around and walk out the door. I don't say anything because I can't promise her anything.

**Christian – Almost Eight Years Earlier**

** "He attacked me," Mason Ross spits out, "My Dad pays a lot of money to this school…. I don't need to be attacked by Christian Grey."**

I shake my head. He called my girl a whore and expects to be able to walk out of here a free man. This is ridiculous.

"He called my girlfriend a whore in the middle of English class," I remind Principal Thompson, "All I did was hold his ass up against a few lockers, forcing him to apologize for being a Neanderthal to my girlfriend."

Thompson scratches his bald spot and shakes his head. "That behavior isn't allowed at this school, Mr. Ross. Miss Steele is a very nice and sweet girl and you decided to interrupt Mrs. Daugherty's English class to speak to her in a derogatory way," Thompson says sternly, "But violence isn't acceptable at this school Mr. Grey."

"I wasn't violent with him," I spit out.

He shakes his head, "We're going to call your parents, and both of you are suspended for a day."

I shake my head in frustration and look around the room. I see a picture on his desk. I assume this picture is of Mr. Thompson's wife and their two young sons. I pick the picture up and point to Ross.

"Can I speak with you alone, Mr. Thompson?" I ask, "I don't want him in the room…. He doesn't understand love."

Thompson chuckles and sends Mason Ross to the waiting room. I turn the picture so Thompson can see it.

"Listen chief, I didn't have a lot in my life before Anastasia Steele walked into it. I got in a lot of shit at my other schools, and I placed myself in bad situations…. I really didn't have a lot to live for. And then Anastasia Steele walked into my life, and I was sold. She is it. She is my life. She is my world. Then she got pregnant with our son, and I know I should be terrified because I am seventeen, almost eighteen, and I have nothing to my name, but man…. It was like she told me I won the lottery. Now I have two people to live for. If some asshole came along and called YOUR wife a whore because she was pregnant with your son…. what would you do Principal Thompson?"

He nods knowingly and I know I just talked myself out of my suspension.

"Go back to class Grey…." Thompson says with a nod, "I'll take care of Mr. Ross."

**Christian – Present Time**

**Ana has tried to call me close to fifteen times this morning. **As I pull up outside her house, I decide it's time to finally answer. He isn't here yet so I can talk to her while I wait.

"Hi…."

"Christian, what are you doing?"

I hear the desperation in her voice. She wants me to let this go, and she doesn't want this to result in violence. I can't let this go. She is my life. She has always been my life.

"I'll call you when I'm done…."

"Don't get yourself arrested," she sighs deeply, "I don't want to lose you over something petty."

"Listen to me," I tell her, "I'm not going anywhere. Don't worry. But you can't stop this. I need to deal with him and what he did…." Finally, his truck pulls up the driveway. "Baby, I've gotta go…. I'll be home soon."

I hang up the phone and get out of my car. I meet Eddie half way, and I see the anger in his eyes. _Well fuck you buddy, I'm mad too. _

"What the hell do you want Grey?" he snaps at me, "I'll call the cops for trespassing."

Without a second thought, I lunge forward and punch him in the face. He lets out a scream as he falls to the ground, clutching his cheek. I want to hurt him more, but Ana would never forgive me for putting him in the hospital. I want to, but I can't cross a line. I watch him writhe in agony and I kick him again for good measure.

"If you ever touch her ever again…. I'll make this much worse."

"Fuck you Grey…. You're the one who fucking slept with my fiancée….," He yells back at me.

"But I would never hurt her… you sack of shit." He gets up and I think he might lunge for me. Except, he shakes his head and runs his hands through his hair.

"I hate myself for what I did," he says in a whisper. I think the asshole might actually start crying. "I hate that I hit her… I don't know what the fuck I was thinking."

We both stand in silence, and I realize that my work here is done. There is nothing else I can do here, and I'd much rather be with Ana right now. I walk to my car, and my feet stop at Eddie's words.

"I love her so much…. I can't believe I lost her."

I turn around and shake my head. "She should have never been yours to lose…."


	18. Rebuilding

**A/N – Let me just hand forward a friendly reminder that I am not forcing you to read this. So if you have constructive problems with what I am doing, feel free to review or PM me so we can discuss it. Some people can't handle a healthy discussion, but I am not that person. Moving on now. **

**Thank you guys for the great feedback from the last chapter! You guys are still the best! I am working on Feel Again and I am hoping to get an update out soon. We'll see. **

**I don't own FSOG – thanks for reading! **

**Chapter 18 – Rebuilding **

**Ana**

**I sit nervously in the kitchen, waiting patiently for Christian to come home to me.** I knew deep down in my gut that this would happen. I couldn't stop Christian today. I tried, but I couldn't. Christian is going to handle this how Christian is going to handle it.

I just want to move on. I didn't realize it at the time, but the minute I cheated on Eddie with Christian, I sealed my fate. Eddie and I are history, and now I have a future to plan with Christian. I just want him with me, and not trying to punch out my ex.

Gail comes through the kitchen with a phone in her hand. "Mr. Grey is on his way back, Miss Steele."

"Thank you Gail," I reply, forcing out a smile.

"Dear, don't fret," she says as she places a hand over mine, "He won't be hauled off to jail. He wouldn't risk his ability to see you or Ted. He just has to beat his chest and do the man thing first…."

I sigh, "Thank you for being here…. All the time."

She smiles affectionately, "He's a good boy who has made bad decisions. He just needed his girl to make everything right."

"How do you know that I'm his girl…?"

Gail and I have only had few interactions with each other. When we have spoken, we've had pleasant interactions, and I already feel like I know her a little. In reality, Gail should know Leighton better then she knows me, and must have some kind of bond with her. I may be out of my mind to think that Gail has any sort of loyalty to me.

She snickers to herself, "Before all of this nonsense with Leighton, if you ever mentioned Leighton to Christian – he would simply smile. When anyone would ever mention you, he lit up like a Christmas tree. It was obvious that you were always his girl."

I smile to myself as she squeezes my hand. "And I knew you had to be good to raise such a sweet little boy…." Gail says with a smirk, "I do love him to death."

I smile back and say thank you. She saunters off, and I turn to the front door, waiting in anticipation for Christian to come home. When the door finally opens moments later, I practically jump to my feet.

He walks through the door and sets his coat on a side table. I stand up and move closer. He stops and our eyes meet for a quick second. I analyze his face, seeing if I can see a trace of cuts or bruises. I see nothing, so I can only assume that Eddie received most of the injuries. He moves closer to me, and when we're close, he softly caresses my face.

"Hi," I breathe.

"Hi," he smiles back.

"Is he in the hospital?"

He frowns for a fraction of a second and then shakes his head. "I figured you would have hated me if I put him in the hospital."

"You're learning," I tease him. He pulls me closer and holds my body tight against his.

He shakes his head, "He only got was coming to him…. And then a kick in the ribs for good measure."

I cringe at the thought. "I don't like that you did that."

He cups my chin, "I know…. But I had to. You're mine and nobody touches what is mine."

"Neanderthal," I whisper as our lips touch. We kiss deeply for several seconds and want pools deep inside of me. His lips move from my lips to my cheek and on to my neck and ear lobe.

"I've been waiting for this moment all day," he whispers in my ear, "The moment I can come home to you, and get you naked, and make love to you."

"How bout we start in the shower," I practically moan as his lips glide down my neck, "I want to wash this morning off of you."

"Fantastic Idea," he whispers as he suddenly throws me over his shoulder. My shoes pop off my feet and Christian smacks my ass.

"I feel like we've done this before in a past life," I laugh as he carries me to the shower, "PUT ME DOWN! I can walk!"

He laughs a deep laugh, "Not until the shower baby…."

I scream and smack him as he carries me to the bathroom. Once we're in the bathroom, he somehow manages to kick off his shoes and unbutton his pants with me over his shoulder. He drops me on the floor, and I quickly pull off my clothes. He pulls his pants off the rest of the way and practically rips off his shirt as I drag him into the shower with me.

He turns on the water, and nuzzles into my neck. "This is what I should have done all morning…." He mutters as he kisses and bites my neck.

"I'm not disagreeing," I reply as I pull his lips to mine.

I wrap my arms around his neck and wrap my legs around his waist. "No cleaning?" he grins as he holds firmly to my ass.

I shake my head, "I want something else from you."

I grab for him, and he is hard and ready. "I'm always ready for you," he whispers in my ear, "Always fucking ready."

I lower myself on his awaiting erection, and he groans deeply. He moves me up and down and I relish the feeling of him hot and hard inside of me. We move in unison and his grunts and groans spur me on to go faster.

"Don't leave me," he breathes.

"I won't," I groan back.

"I couldn't take it if you left me again. Don't leave me. Say you're mine."

"I'm yours," I groan as I feel my orgasm start to build.

"Yes," he breathes as he starts driving faster. In no time, I come fast and hard and he follows quickly after me.

"I love you," I whisper as I come down from my orgasm.

"I love you," he says back as he kisses my forehead, "So much."

**Eight Years Earlier - Ana**

** "Oh my god," Macy whispers as she pats Ted's small head, "He might be the cutest little boy I have ever seen."**

"I know, right," I giggle, "He is perfect."

"He looks just like Christian," Macy says with a nod, "He is so cute and he's got those small baby hands…."

I giggle as Ted makes a sweet garbled noise. "Say, I know Aunt Macy…. I'm just the cutest little boy you have ever seen."

We both giggle at the intoxicating sweetness of my beautiful baby boy. Ted is three weeks old and I have been in love every hour, every second, and every millisecond of his sweet little life. I kiss his forehead and he makes another sweet noise.

"He is so calm…."Macy notices.

"I just fed him so we'll soon expect a diaper change…."

"Oh babies are cute until they poop," Macy says with a giggle, "So…. where is Christian?"

Ted came into the world during the last week of my senior year. I missed my last three finals, and I couldn't graduate without taking them. The school was willing to wait a week and a half for me to recover, and I had to take my exams back to back. My mind wasn't into it, but I did everything I could to pass. I hope it was enough.

"He is running a few errands, and he is picking up my grades, and hopefully my diploma…."

"I can't believe he skipped graduation too," Macy says as Ted grabs her finger, "That was sweet of him to sit out for you." Grace and Carrick were furious that Christian skipped graduation, but he did it for me. We spent the evening with our son, and he even did a ridiculously adorable graduation walk for us.

I nod, "It was."

"So I assume he had no problem with catching up on school?" Macy asks.

I laugh at her, "Are you kidding me…. He is a super genius."

A knock comes from the door and we both turn to look. Christian peeks through and he smiles when he sees us.

"Hey Macy…. Can you give me a moment with my son and my girl?"

"Of course Christian," she hops off the bed. She leans over to kiss my cheek. "I need to go anyway. Call me later…"

Macy walks out, and Christian takes her place on the bed. He puts a bag on side of the bed and leans over to kiss me.

"Hi," I say with a smile.

"Hi," he smiles back, "How are you feeling?"

I nod, "That depends….. what's in the bag."

He smiles brightly. "Hey Ted," he says as he leans over to kiss him, "Guess what… your Mommy is a high school graduate"

"Really?" I ask. Ted makes another sweet little noise, and I fight to look on his side of the bed.

He laughs, "Are you kidding me? Have you met you?"

He pulls out a graduation cap and my diploma. I stare at the document, and then at my son. Christian places the hat on my hid and kisses my nose.

"I'm proud of you. You push out my son and three A's on your exams…. You are so damn good baby. You should be going to Harvard with me."

"I got three A's?" I ask in shock. I thought I did ok, but I didn't think I did that well.

"In Calculus, English, and Anatomy…. Three tough ones," he says as he lies down on bed with Ted. He leans over to place another kiss on Ted's forehead. "You don't have to register for Cosmetology school, you know."

I shake my head, "It makes the most sense. I am a young mother, and I need to be able to support him."

"It doesn't have to be Harvard," Christian continues, "You can go to Boston College…. Or BU… hell, there are a ton of schools in Boston. You should be able to do what you want to do."

"My dream is taking care of my son…." I say shaking my head, "I don't have time to go to a four year college right now."

"I hate this for you," he says, sitting up, "You should be able to get what you want to. You'll waste away at cosmetology school. You're fucking brilliant…. YOU should be the one at Harvard. One day, I'll support us… you won't need fucking beauty school."

I pull Ted into my arms and smile sadly at my sweet boy. He looks sleepy; we may be looking at nap time soon. "It's not about me anymore…."

He stares at his both and shakes his head in exasperation. "I have one more surprise in the bag…." He says softly, "But right now…. I feel like it should be a magic genie so you can go to school and be super Mom."

"What is it?" I ask as I look up at him. He gets down to his knees and reaches into the bag. He pulls out a small box, and moves from two knees to one.

My jaw drops, "What are you doing?"

He smiles wide, "You are my angel. I had nothing until you walked into my life. Now, I have two people who I love more than anything. I know we're young. I know there are millions of men who would be better for you. I know I am fifty shades of fucked up, but I love you and I can't stop how I feel…. Will you marry me?"

He pops open the box and as the diamond glitters in my eyes, only one word comes to mind.

"Yes…."

**Present Time – Ana**

**"I have a question," Christian asks me as he caresses my face.** I squirm underneath the sheets and he kisses me chastely. "And you have to answer it…. It's a very important question."

After a rather long shower romp, Christian wrapped us up in several towels and moved us to the bedroom. We've spent the afternoon kissing, and touching, and licking, and rediscovering each other.

"What?" I ask sleepily as I cuddle into his side.

He brushes back my hair and kisses my forehead lightly. "Do you still wear socks when you go to bed?"

I laugh loudly as I kick his legs with my unclothed feet. "Yes of course, I do."

"Does my lady need her socks?" he asks as he tickles my feet. I squirm and laugh, trying to get away from his merciless fingers.

"They are comfy," I tell him, "And it gets cold…. I can't help it."

"I know baby," he teases as he burrows his face into my neck, "I love that about you."

"Do you still snore?" I fire back, "Because I swear, you used to wake Ted up all the time when we lived in Boston."

He gasps in horror. "I never snore!"

"You used to sound like a freight train," I laugh at him, "It used to scare Ted all the time. You are lucky that you have a big penis and are good in bed because it was the snoring that almost caused me to sleep on the couch…."

"I don't snore," he says shaking his head, "You're crazy woman."

I take a look around his bedroom and take in a deep breath. "So, how am I going to get my stuff out of Eddies, and how are Ted and I going to move here…."

He looks up at the ceiling and nods. "I have a movers going over in the morning. They'll pack up everything."

"I need to go over there for a little bit," I whisper.

"Absolutely not," he snaps, "No way in hell."

"Christian, I just need to make sure…."

"This is why I have money," he interrupts me, "To stop you from doing something absolutely ridiculous. You are not going to Eddie's…. not now, not ever."

I shake my head, "I really don't think he meant to hit me."

His jaw drops, "You would have still stayed with him if he brushed it off as some bullshit accident?"

"No because I would never expose Ted to that," I interrupt him, "But he's a good man. He really messed up."

He shakes his head, "No good man hits a woman. I don't care how angry you are…."

"We did a shitty thing," I turn to him, "I hate that I did that to him."

"Well Eddie did a shitty thing too," Christian fires back, his eyes deep with conviction, "He should have never touched you."

I nod and grab for his hand. "So what's next…."I ask him, "We've established that there is still something deep running between us…. "

"You both live with me, and we stay together forever…." He says adamantly, "You'll go to school in August. You'll graduate and you'll ditch the salon…. We'll be both running the world by no time."

I laugh and kiss his lips lightly. "Good plan babe."

He smiles and curls his hand around the back of my head. "What if we traveled," he says against my lips, "You, me and Ted…. What if we traveled and I took you guys to Greece and Paris and London…. Places you've never been before."

I lay my head back down on my pillow and think about his proposition. "I've always wanted to go to Spain."

"I'd love to take you to Spain…."

"I'd love for you to take me to Spain…."

"It's a deal," he says with a heartwarming smile.

"Christian…." I say nervously, "What if she is pregnant with your kid…. What are we going to do?"

He shakes his head, "Nothing changes."

"But… pregnancy changes things. She is going to need you. You'll need to be there for your kid," I tell him.

"It changes nothing," he says, shaking his head, "I know what I want and she is lying in this bed next to me…. Fuck Leighton and her manipulative bullshit." He kisses my forehead, "She'll only bring us down if we let her. Promise me, Ana."

"I promise," I whisper into his neck.

"Trust me when I say that you're it for me. There is no one else. When you want to doubt us is when you need to trust me the most." I see nothing, but confidence and pure determination pouring out of him. I couldn't doubt him even if I tried.

"Christian," I say with a soft kiss on his lips, "I promise."

"Good," he says, holding me close, "It's only ever been you."

"She helped you through a shitty time," I say, running my hand up and down his abs, "A shitty time that I caused."

"No…" he says shaking his head, "Don't talk like that."

"She did," I whisper back, feeling a flash of insecurity.

"And she also tried to get pregnant with my kid," he fires back bitterly, "She was supposed to be different, and then she turned out to be exactly what I didn't want… I'll never forgive her for that."

"What time is it?" I ask, desperately wanting to change the subject. I turn over to find my phone, "I have a three o clock appointment."

"What the hell?" he snaps, "I thought you were clear all day…."

I pull out my phone and realize it's two thirty already. "I have to go."

"Over my dead body," hisses as he grabs my arm, "Stay with me…."

"I have to get our son from school, and then I'll go to my appointment, and then I'll be back…. Don't worry."

"Have Ted stay with Gail," he offers.

I shake my head, "That won't be necessary. The girls at the salon miss Ted. They'll take good care of him…."

He smirks, "My boy is learning early."

I lean over to leave to kiss Christian. "I'll be back later this and we can have dinner as a family…. And we can continue what we've done all day."

Christian smacks my behind. "I'm holding you to that…."

**I hold Ted's hand as we walk down the street to my salon. **He has been talking nonstop about his day at school, and seems to bouncing off the walls with happiness. I have never seen Ted this excited. I never knew Ted could be this happy. I never knew attempting to fix things with Christian would have Ted this happy.

Before we walk inside, I kneel in front of him. "Are you excited that Mommy and Daddy are back together?"

He shrugs, but his responding grin tells me everything I need to know. "How long are we going to be at the salon?" Ted asks, "I want to hang out with Dad."

I kiss his cheek, "I have one appointment and then we'll be home…. You'll get to hang out with Talia."

He blushes and I can't help but laugh. He has had a huge crush on the receptionist Talia for years. We walk the rest of the way inside, and a shrill of female excitement greets us.

"TED!" Serena squeals, "It's so good to see you buddy."

Ted hides behind my legs, and Talia kneels in front of him. "Come on Ted…. Sit with me while Mom cuts hair. Do you have homework?"

He nods, "I have math."

"Math, I'm a whiz at Math…." Talia says as she grabs his hand, "Come on bud, come sit at the desk with me."

I squeeze Ted's hand as we walks away with Talia. I show my client to my chair and Serena gives me a knowing smile.

She nods at my client, "Julie, I just need you to know that we're going to spend most of your appointment talking about Ana's drama…. And let me tell you girl…. She has drama…. Start from the beginning Steele."

I look over at Ted with Talia and then back to Serena. "I told Eddie about Christian and me….. and he …. Um….. kind of hit me."

Everyone in the salon stops and stares at me, and I turn to make sure Talia and Ted didn't hear me. They're still off in their little world of third grade math, so I turn back to Serena.

"That asshole did what?"

"Calm down," I hiss at her, pointing to Ted.

"What a prick," Serena hisses, "Please tell me Christian punched him down for that shit." I nod and she smiles. "Good…. I can't believe Eddie would do that."

"Cheat on him," I mutter under my breath, "And he will do a lot of crazy shit."

She shakes her head, "He is an asshole….. So are you and Christian back together? lease tell me you two are back together."

I nod and she smiles. "We made up this morning… in the shower."

Serena giggles, "Well…. You guys deserve it. Have you heard any more from Crazy Mc Crazy town?"

"No…" I say immediately, shaking my head, "I haven't heard a thing from her." I can't tell her the truth that is hanging over Christian and me. She could be possibly pregnant with Christian's kid, and she could possibly ruin everything we're trying to rebuild.

"Hmmmm," Serena hums, "Well…. Maybe she is done now that you've told him."

I hope she is done with him. I hope she doesn't try and insert herself between us. I'll be ready to fight if she does.

"Mom," Ted yells across the salon, "Are you done yet? I want to see Daddy."

Serena and I both grin at each other. "We'll see Daddy soon buddy."

**After a long afternoon, Ted and I are finally at Escala. **He has talked about nothing, but his Dad all afternoon and that's how it should be. My son and I are both blissfully happy to be back with Christian.

"I want Gail to make macaroni and cheese tonight," Ted says as the elevator climbs to the top, "With the beef in it…."

"We'll see…. Did Talia help you finish all of your homework?" I ask him as his face turns red.

"Yes…" he says as his face turns red.

"You like Talia…. Don't you?"

"No," he says, shaking his head wildly.

"Whatever you say," I tease him, "No girlfriends until you're twenty, Ted. I need to be the only woman in your life for a while."

"Talia isn't my girlfriend," he says with a huff. I laugh as we step out of the elevator and walk to the front door.

Taylor stops us at the front. "Miss Steele…. We have a problem."

"What problem?" I ask as Gail joins us.

"Hey sweet boy…. Come with me," Gail says, grabbing Ted's hand. Ted goes with her willingly, and my heart starts beating faster.

'What is going on Taylor?" I ask once the door is closed.

"Ms. Miller showed up this afternoon," Taylor tells me, "And Mr. Grey let her in…. they're in the living room talking."

Ice fills my veins, and I want to kill her. I want to kill him. He let her in – he fucking let her in. "Let me through Taylor…. Somebody is going to die today…."

"


	19. We Really Need to Move

**A/N – Thanks for all the great comments! You guys are the best as always! It's been tough getting this going, so I apologize for not getting this out faster. **

**People who have asked about Feel Again – I thought I'd have that ready for you this weekend, but Feel Again is also taking longer than anticipated. I will try to make my next chapter a Feel Again chapter!**

**Chapter 19 – We really need to move**

**Christian**

** I pick up my phone to text Ana, but then I immediately set it back down.** She will be home with my son very soon, and I need to wait. After spending most of my day with her, I miss Ana like crazy. I try to text her again, but I drop my phone. I don't want to hover or control her time…. well, I don't want her to think I am hovering or trying to control her time.

"Mr. Grey," Taylor says as I throw my last bit of papers down on my desk, "We have a problem."

"Problem?" I ask as I stand.

He nods, "Ms. Miller is downstairs….. Begging to see you."

My blood runs cold at the sound of her name. "Escort her off the premises," I tell him bitterly.

"She is making a scene in the lobby, and if she is escorted out – she'll make an even bigger scene."

"So you want me to talk to her?" I ask, astonished by Taylor's horrible idea.

"I think you should see what she wants," Taylor says gruffly, "Diplomacy may work better in this situation."

I run both hands through my hair, and try to think. "Ana should be back with Ted any minute," I tell him anxiously.

"I will keep a look out for both of them," he says, probably thinking his words are reassuring; "I can even send one or both of them through the separate entrance. This may not even take this long anyway…."

I shake my head at him. "Oh it probably will take forever," I say nervously, "But it needs to be done…. Fuck, send her in."

**Taylor's men downstairs escort her up, and I wait in the Great Room for her to arrive. **She has no reason to be here today. Her stuff was immediately moved out of my apartment, so it's not like she has to pick up her belongings. I have no idea why she would create such a fuss downstairs, and I really want to know what she has to say for herself.

She walks through the foyer, and I notice that her face is red and her eyes are puffy. She has obviously been crying, and I am curious to know if her tears are fake or genuine.

"Can I take a seat?" she asks softly.

I nod as she takes a seat on the opposite couch. "What are you doing here?" I ask her, trying to rein in my residual anger for her.

She wipes a stray tear from her cheek and reaches into her purse. I watch her as she looks for what she is searching for, and I remember back to when things were good between us. She is still so beautiful, and I remember how passionate and intense we used to be. I remember how she listened when I needed to vent. How she let me lean on her when I was upset or frustrated. She used to mean everything to me. Now, all of that is shot to hell.

She pulls out a paper and hands it to me. "You win," she says sadly, "Turns out that everything I tried to do amounted to nothing."

I open the paper and look at her nervously. "What are you talking about?"

"I didn't want to take a pregnancy test because I already had taken several," she tells me, "I've been trying to get pregnant for months."

"Months?" I spit out, "How many months?"

"Nine months," she responds back as my jaw drops. Fuck, I didn't think she'd been trying this for nine fucking months. "It hadn't been working," she continues, "So I went to a specialist…. And it turns out that I am physically unable to have children."

I frantically look through her paperwork, anxiously trying to make sure that everything is legit, and that she isn't lying to me again. I make a mental note of the doctor's name and information. He sounds familiar and I am confident this specialist has worked with my mother in the past. I will take this information to give to my mother and my head of security. I need to make sure that I am not being fucked with again.

"You can't have children," I repeat back.

She shakes her head, "I cannot." Tears begin to boil to the surface and a small part of me feels bad for her.

"Well, I'd say I feel sorry for you, but I would be an expectant father right now if you could reproduce," I tell her honestly, "And I don't want that."

She chokes out a sob, "You mean you don't want that with me…."

I shrug, she is right. "I'm sorry Leighton."

I see more tears, and I feel like an asshole. "I don't get it Christian…. Did I do something that threw you into her arms? We were so good, and then all of a sudden you were gone…."

I take in a deep breath. "I love her. I've always loved her."

"Did you ever love me?" she sobs, "Were the past two years just you wasting time until Ana was willing to come back to you…."

I take in a deep breath and take a seat next to Leighton on the couch. "I did love you. I did…. You meant the world to me, Leigh."

"But I was always going to be second place," she mutters to herself, "You know, I used to think I could give you everything she couldn't. I mean, I was there for you when Ana and Eddie's relationship became stronger."

I nod, hoping she doesn't dive any deeper into that theory. "I know you were…"

"I helped you find the resources you needed when you struggled…. I let you do whatever you wanted to me in your playroom. I was willing to do ANYTHING for you."

"I know."

She shakes her head, "But it still wasn't enough. I still lost you to her, and I am infertile. It's been a really great week for me."

"You'll jump back Leighton," I tell her, "You're nothing but resourceful."

"Thanks," she says sadly, "I'm really going to miss you Christian."

"I'll miss you too," I tell her as I hear the front door open.

In a split second, I feel Leighton grab the back of my head and push her lips to mine. I smack her and push her out of the way, but it's too late. When I look up, Ana is standing at the front door, her eyes blistering with anger. Ana walks down the steps and before I can even blink, Ana is lunging for Leighton, ready to kill.

**Ana**

** I am so glad Ted and Gail went through the second entrance. **I wouldn't want my son to see Leighton kissing Christian, and I wouldn't want him to see his mother attacking Daddy's ex-girlfriend. Christian needed to get his aggression out on Eddie, and I needed to do the same thing to that home wrecking whore.

My first initial move was a smack, and then I somehow managed to wrestle Leighton to the floor. "You bitch," she screams as she manages to smack me on the face. It isn't as hard as my slap was because I have her pinned to the floor.

I feel Christian's arms pull me off of her and I see Taylor intercede to pick Leighton off the floor. "You stay away from us," I scream at her, "You lying manipulative bitch."

"Says the whore who fucked my boyfriend…" she says, acid pouring out of her words.

I try to lunge for her, but Christian pulls me back. "We're done for good," Christian snaps at her, "You and I have nothing more to do with each other…. If I see you around here again, you will be removed and arrested for trespassing."

Leighton scowls and spits at me as Taylor escorts her out of the room. Once she is gone, I pry myself away from Christian. I need a drink, so I march to the kitchen.

"Baby," he breathes as I pull out a bottle of wine from his refrigerator, "She was making a scene and so I let her up and I talked to her and I thought we came to some sort of resolution…. But as soon as she heard the door, she must have known it was you…."

I shake my head as I take a deep pull of the wine from the bottle. I turn and face him, "I wasn't allowed to see Eddie…. Someone who made a mistake and deserved closure from me, but I couldn't do that. But it is ok for you to bring that lying and manipulative whore up here…."

"Eddie hit you."

"So did Leighton," I snap back at him.

"Well baby, when you lunge at someone…. They tend to fight back."

"Don't be cute," I hiss at him, "She fucking kissed you."

"And I smacked her away," he bites back, "I never wanted her to kiss me."

I think adrenaline is still pulsing through my veins because I still feel so angry, angry that she was here, angry that she tried to kiss Christian, and angry that our perfect day was marred by her.

"I need to get our son," I tell him, "Ted and Gail went through the other entrance." I walk past Christian and he grabs my arm.

"Ana, please tell me you aren't mad…." He pleads with me. I hear a hint of desperation in his voice.

"I need to cool off," I say, trying to force out a smile, "Don't worry…. I'll be fine." I walk off before he gets a chance to say another word.

**Christian**

** "Is Mommy ok?" Ted asks as I tuck him into bed. **Ana has been silent all evening and I know Ted has noticed. I knew she would need to cool off, but I didn't think it would take her this long.

"Mommy and I got in a fight," I tell him, modifying the truth, "And…. She is still mad at me about it, but that has nothing to do with you. Your Mom and I are legendary for our arguments."

Ted actually shakes his head, and I can't help but laugh at his exasperation. "Well you two better talk…. I like that I don't have to go back and forth between the two of you, and I want to keep it this way."

I laugh and kiss his temple. "I'll talk to her buddy, don't worry."

"Dad, I have a question," he asks as I walk to the door, "Did you and Mom have me when you were young…."

I lean up against the door and try to think of a good answer for this question. I wasn't expecting him to go there tonight, and I've got nothing good. "Yeah buddy, we did."

"Were you guys really seventeen?" he asks. This has to be the worst time to talk about this, but that's what my boy wants to talk about so I'll talk.

"We were," I tell him as I take a seat back on his bed, "I don't advise you doing the same in ten years…. but we worked hard to give you the best life possible… you weren't expected, but you were the best thing to happen to your mother and me."

Ted nods with a satisfied smile. "Good."

"Is that everything?" I ask, "How'd you put that together?"

He shrugs, "Math class." Of course, he is turning into a math whiz. I laugh as I give him another kiss. "Talk to Mommy, Dad. She needs you right now….."

**I leave Ted's room, and look around the apartment for Anastasia. **We're so close to having everything we have ever wanted, and I don't want tonight to ruin it. Once I get the confirmation that Leighton is really infertile, I'll feel like I can really move on. I'll feel like Ana and I can really move on.

I look around the corner, and notice the playroom's door is open. I walk through and see Ana standing in the middle of the room. I don't like the possibilities of what could be floating through her head. I don't want my predilections to get in the way of us moving forward. I don't want anything to get in the way of us moving forward.

"Are you still mad at me?" I ask, hoping it knocks her out her trance.

She shakes her head, "No."

"I am going to talk to my mom, and try to get more information about her doctor. I want confirmation that she is actually unable to have children before I believe her words." She stays quiet, and I am amazed that didn't get any kind of reaction out of her. I walk forward and wrap my arm around her back. "I usually keep this door locked."

She turns to face me and smiles apologetically. "I broke in…"

I am so relieved and so shocked by her in house felony. "You broke into my playroom?"

She nods, "I was curious."

I take in a deep breath, "For the record… I'll only want this with you if you want it too…."

She scans the room again, "I'm not even 100 percent sure what this is."

That's fair. I can work with that. "I can teach you," I whisper in her ear as I bite her ear lobe, "Only if you want to."

I feel her tension fade and I kiss her lightly on the lips. "I want to learn…. I want anything with you," she tells me, "But…."

"But what?"

She pouts before she opens her mouth to speak. "We really need to move…."


	20. Mine Forever

**Chapter 20 – Mine Forever **

**Ana**

** "I want to take you out tonight," Christian says and I know he is smiling, "We can have Gail watch Ted…. And we can spend the entire night together." **I squirm at the promise in his words.

I pull up next to the house and park my car. "I'd like that…."

"Good," he says and I can feel his peace and contentment over the phone, "Are you at work?"

I need to tell him. I can't be dishonest anymore, especially with him. He needs to know what I am about to do.

"I'm at Eddie's house…" I tell him quietly, "I need to do this."

"No you don't," he shoots back, hurt and anger evident in his tone, "I cannot believe you would do this." He sounds desperate and angry, but I have no idea what to do. This conversation with Eddie needs to happen, and he is so insistent on it not happening.

"Baby, I was with him for three years," I tell him, trying to appease his desperation, "I have to do this…."

"He hurt you," he snaps, anger spilling through the phone, "I can't have you around him."

I shake my head, "This won't take that long Christian…. And I know he won't go there again…. I know him well enough to know that this won't happen twice." Eddie made a mistake, and he knows it. He knew it the minute after he slapped me. He is a good man who made a mistake. I would never stay with him after that, but I know where is heart is.

"Ana, no…." he pleads.

"I love you. I'll be home tonight and we can have our date," I say as I hang up on him. I gather myself and get out of the car. I hate that my decision to talk to Eddie has Christian in such a state, but I need to do this. He got closure with Leighton, I need it with Eddie.

Movers are working hard to get all of mine and Ted's belongings packed, and I have to navigate around them in order to find Eddie. The job of packing my belongings seem to be almost complete and it feels empty in this house. My old home feels as empty as the current state of my relationship with its current occupant.

It hurts. I loved Eddie. I really did. He was my saving grace when things with Christian went south. He loved me and Ted unconditionally, and I hate that I hurt him like this. I hate that we ended this way.

"Ana…." I hear his voice softly behind me. I turn around and see Eddie standing in the kitchen, staring at me nervously.

"Hey," I say, not sure exactly how to approach him.

I see the hurt in his eyes, and I have so many conflicting feelings. I hurt him first, and I'll never forgive myself for how I conducted myself behind his back. On the other hand, he could have said something. He could have brought up his suspicions so it didn't fester and result in him lashing out the way he did. There were so many possibilities for how this could have ended, and I hate that we ended this way.

"Hey," he responds back, "I'm surprised to see you Ana. I didn't think he'd let you out." I can't help but notice the bitter tone in his words.

I laugh awkwardly, "He knows I am here, and he isn't happy about it."

"Why are you here?" he snaps quickly, his voice full of repressed anger, "To rub your relationship with him in my face? To rub in the fact that when I lost you, I lost everything because of one stupid impulse decision - I don't want you here if that's why you're here. I'm already in enough pain."

I shake my head, "That's not why I am here."

He turns to walk to the backyard and he motions for me to follow him. I try to gather my thoughts; I need this to mean something. I need to let him go, and I need to do it in the right way. It's not as easy as it seems.

He paces the backyard, and I watch him as I take a seat. He pulls his hands through his long dark hair, and he takes in a deep breath.

"Why?" he says after several moments of silence, "Why did you sleep with him? Did I push you too hard? Did I not give you something that you needed? What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything," I say without a second thought. I don't really know how to answer this question. It wasn't about him. The wedding pressure was hard to swallow at times, and Christian was an outlet for that stress, but I know that isn't the only reason for why I did what I did.

"Then what was it Ana?" Eddie says, voice angry, "What happened? I loved you. I thought you loved me. I would have done anything for you and Ted. I don't get it. I wanted to be with you forever, and I was willing to do anything to have you forever…."

I know my words will hurt him, but I have to tell him the truth. I feel tears form in my eyes. I don't want to hurt him. Apart of me still loves him – it's just not enough.

"I loved you Eddie," I say, holding back tears, "But somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I couldn't marry you."

"Didn't we plan this?" he asks bemused, "We planned a life together…. did you not want that? Did you fucking lie to me?"

"I guess I just couldn't put together reality with the dream," I say with a shrug, "Eddie…. I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say."

He shakes his head and I can see he is trying to hold back some sort of emotion. "What does Ted know?"

It takes me a second before I realize what he is asking. "He knows you were upset that night, but he doesn't know you hit me."

He blanches at my words, but he eventually nods and moves on. "I wanted to say goodbye to Ted, but I have a feeling that he won't allow that to happen."

Before I can say a word, I hear Christian's sharp voice cut across Eddie's backyard. "Your damn right you can't talk to my son," he hisses as he moves toward me, "Get up Ana…. We're leaving."

"Christian, stop. I'm fine…."

He practically growls, "Get up Ana. We're leaving; I don't want you around this asshole ever again."

Christian grabs my hand and I push him back. "Do not touch me like that," I bark at him, "I told you that I was fine, and that I needed this. He wasn't going to hurt me, but you don't fucking listen."

He stands back, "Then what do you expect me to do?"

"Let me finish this conversation with him. You can stand at that window and watch so you can see that nothing is going to happen, you condescending asshole."

He sighs with exasperation, "You have five minutes." He storms back into the house and sets up shop at the window in my old kitchen.

I turn back to Eddie. "Sorry."

He shakes his head and smirks sarcastically, "It's always a joy to see him."

"Listen," I say, shaking my head, "I'm sorry…. For everything. I don't know what else to say."

He shakes his head, "We keep beating a dead horse. I don't know what else is left."

I nod, "So…. do you think the movers are almost done?"

"Yeah," he says, motioning to the house, "Last I checked they had your clothes left to pack…."

I cringe at the thought. "Movers are going to pack my underwear?"

He snickers for the first time since I walked into this house. "I didn't really want to do it," he says to himself, "And I am sure he has had them sign some sort of ridiculous contract to never discuss the contents of his girlfriend's underwear drawer."

We both stand in silence for a bit longer. "I'm moving," he says, staring at his feet, "I am going to have more movers come once his are out. This isn't a home for a bachelor…. I found a good apartment at a descent price so I'm jumping on it."

I never wanted him to move, but maybe the memories of this house are too hard to handle. I know I'd feel that way if our roles were reversed. "That's good," I say with a nod.

"I've also been going to see a therapist…. I want a fresh start which means I need to cope with the past..."

I feel more tears begin to take shape. I'm the reason he has to do this. I am the reason he can't cope with the past, and it sucks. I hate that he is in pain because of me.

"I want only what's best for you Eddie…. I hope you know that."

He nods with a sad smile, "And I you, Ana…."

**Once I am in the passenger seat, Christian slams the door. **I guess my car is just going to walk itself back to Escala.I know he is mad, but he is just going to have to get over it. I needed to make my peace with Eddie, and I don't care if he hates it.

He takes a seat at the wheel and he turns to gaze at me. "I don't like what you did today," he says honestly, "I told you that I didn't feel comfortable with this."

"I just needed to meet with him once, just once. I was with him for three years…."

"God, you could have let me send security with you," he says as he beats the steering wheel, "I drove here like a bat out of hell because if he hurt you again…. I couldn't let that happen."

"I was fine, you need to stop. I needed to do this and you need to trust me," I practically scream at him, "This overprotectiveness is sweet …. But sometimes it's so stifling, like you think I can't handle myself."

He rubs his face and runs his hands through his hair. "Of course you can handle yourself…. It's just that…."

"It's just what?" I snap.

"I lost you once," he says, his voice barely a whisper, "I can't lose you again…."

I lay my head back on the seat and let his words sink in. "I don't feel like I can say sorry any more then I have for the last eight years of my life," I say as I turn to him, "I'm sorry."

He shakes his head, "I don't want you to apologize."

"Then what do you want?"

"I want clear, solid proof that you're mine. Forever. No more bullshit exes and no more pulling up the past…. I want you forever, and I want to know that you feel the same way."

If all he needs is reassurance, then I can give him that. I lean over and softly kiss his lips.

"I am yours…. Forever."

**Three Days Later **

** "Where are we going Dad?" Teddy squirms on my lap, "Why do me and Mom need these blindfolds?"**

"Because it's a surprise buddy," he laughs.

"We're going to get in so much trouble for having Ted on my lap," I remind Christian, "Don't let any cops pull us over."

"Please Ana, of course I'll drive careful…. But I just wanted you both to see my surprise at the same time." The car comes to a stop and I feel Christian's anticipation and excitement. "Alright baby, take off the blindfold."

I reach around to pull off my blindfold, and then I reach for Teddy's. My heart stops when I see what is in front of me, and I am sure Teddy's eyes might pop out of their sockets.

"Is that a house?" Ted asks in astonishment.

Christian laughs, "Of course it's a house buddy…. It's under construction right now…. but soon, it's going to be the house where you, me, and your Mom will live together."

All three of us climb out of the car, and I can't believe my eyes. The house is huge. There are at least three stories, maybe even more. We have so much land, and so much space to grow. I shake my head in shock.

Christian walks over lightly pushes my jaw up. "Close your mouth baby, a bird might fly in."

I giggle as I see Ted run across the meadow. "I'm just in shock…."

"Come on," he says as he moves me forward, "I have more for you to see." He yells for Ted, "Come on Ted. Come with me and Mom. There is more to see."

Ted follows behind us and I hold tight to Christian. A thought suddenly hits me. "Who is doing this construction? Eddie's company is the best in the city."

He brushes it off, "No it isn't. I wanted a smaller company anyway…."

"What company is that?"

"It seems that my older brother just needed capitol in order to spread his wings and start his own company…. "

"Elliot?"

He laughs, "Don't sound so shocked….. for being a complete idiot, he seems to know what he is doing when it comes to restoring homes."

The house is bare, and definitely needs a lot of work. I love it. I wouldn't want some stuffy home; I love that we can build this together. I love the house, I love that Christian is making plans, I love that he is always mapping out our future.

"Don't worry," he says as he walks me through the back, "We are going to fight about plans every step of the way… I wanted something we could make together."

The front yard is just as beautiful as the backyard. There is nothing but green grass and water and I am in awe of the view. "Are you going to put your boat back here?" I ask him as I spin back around to talk to him. My jaw drops for a second time because Christian has dropped to his knee.

"You're it for me. It's always been you. I want to live here with you, and our son, and the other children that we'll have together. I love you Ana…. Marry me please."

Unlike the last time I was proposed to, I had nothing but doubt run through my head. Now, I know for certain what I want and he is kneeling right in front of me.

"Yes…."

**A/N – Thank you guys for waiting patiently while I finished **_**Feel Again**_**. I wanted to be sure to wrap that up before I continued with this one. I am also hoping to work on **_**I love you, mean it**_**, but it still needs a lot of work. **

**There is still more to come, I know it seems like this is nearing an end but I still have more to go. Like – revealing the engagement to the Greys and the Steeles and a little trip I have planned for C and A. **

**Thanks for reading and please review if you wish! I don't own FSOG! **


	21. Three More Weeks

**A/N – Thanks for all the reviews from the last chapter! I hope you enjoy this new chapter! I don't own FSOG and please review! **

**Chapter 21 – Three More Weeks **

**Ana**

** "After tonight's dinner at my parents and after lunch with your parents tomorrow…. We're running away together."**

I laugh as I slip on a pair of crème louboutins from our closet. I run my hands down my red lace Marchesa dress nervously, a dress that I don't even want to ask the price tag on, and turn to the handsome man standing behind me. He smiles salaciously as he examines me up and down. He looks edible himself dressed in only his dress pants and button up shirt. He has a jacket around here somewhere.

"I'm nervous," I tell him honestly.

"I could tell," he says, pointing to my joined hands, "You always fiddle with your hands when you're nervous."

He walks forward and leaves me a soft kiss on my cheek. "Your parents are going to hate that we're engaged."

"Honestly baby….. I really don't care," he says with a shrug, "Nothing they say or do is going to break what we have….. I won't lose you again for any reason."

The possessiveness in his eyes has me, and I stand on my tippy toes to kiss him. "You won't lose me."

"Promise me," he says softly, his eyes never leaving mine, "That nothing that happens tonight will stop us."

"Nothing," I say to him, "Gets in the middle of us."

He leaves me a soft kiss on the forehead and grabs my hand. "You look so fucking beautiful," he breathes, "If tonight's coming out party wasn't so important; we would be home and naked."

I allow him to lead me out of the bathroom and into the living room. Our son is coloring on the coffee table with Gail. His hair still looks damp from his bath, and he is already in his PJs. When he sees me, his eyes go wide in shock.

"Mommy, you look pretty!" he exclaims as he runs over to me.

I lean over to hug my baby boy. "Thanks sweets," I reply with a kiss.

"Don't I look pretty?" Christian asks as Teddy giggles.

"No…. only mommy."

Christian laughs and gives him a hug, "Great answer son."

"Why can't I come with you," Ted pouts sadly, "I wanna see grandma and grandpa and Aunt Mia."

"When your Mom and me leave for our trip, you're spending three weeks with your grandparents so you'll have plenty of time with them then…."

Three weeks? He is taking me away for three weeks? He keeps talking about this trip he has planned for us, but he has never mentioned that we are spending three weeks away from Seattle. He looks up at me and grins.

"Those are all the details you're getting for now," Christian says with a wink, "Don't complain."

I shake my head and Christian gives Ted another hug. "Here Mom," Ted says as we move for the door, "Remember to give these pictures to grandma and grandpa….. all right?"

I smirk to myself and Christian shakes his head at me. I might have commissioned Ted to make a few pictures for his grandparents in order to soften the blow of our engagement announcement. I am using my son as a buffer between my future in-laws, so sue me.

I place the pictures in my purse and lean over to give one last kiss to Ted. "Be good for Gail," I say as we exit for the elevators.

"You have no shame, Miss Steele."

"Why are you withholding information about our THREE week trip?" I snap at him.

He snickers and holds me close, "Because I can…."

**The party is in full swing when Christian and we arrive to the Grey home. **I am terrified and shaking. Christian's parents are incredibly intimidating, and they both hate me. I thought Grace liked me at first, but then Christian contemplated not attending Harvard because of me and the baby. Harvard put a serious cramp in mine and Grace's relationship and it only got worse as my relationship with Christian fell apart.

Carrick has never liked me, but I think that has more to do with my father. Ray and Carrick had a great boss/subordinate relationship and became fast friends when I was a kid. Whenever Christian got me pregnant, that put a stop to my father and Carrick's friendly relationship. I was immediately the seventeen year old gold digger, and Christian was the scumbag hoodlum who got me pregnant. They've never been able to recover. Ted has a good relationship with Christian's parents, and they adore our little boy. That's all I really want from Grace and Carrick.

Once we begin to make our way through the party, I see Christian's younger sister Mia running for us. "Ana," Mia squeals as she runs towards me, "It's so good to see you." I hold tighter to Christian.

"It's good to see you too…."

"I heard everything," Mia says dramatically, "And oh my god…. I am so glad you're back. I hated Leighton. She had nice legs and I know my brother is a leg and ass man, but she was seriously the worst…. I bet their relationship was only about sex."

I feel Christian tense beside me. "Mia…. Filter please!" Christian pleads.

She shrugs and hugs me. "Sorry, I'm just glad you're back." Mia runs off and Christian moves to whisper in my ear.

"Sorry…. That girl has no filter."

I shake off the bad feelings. "It's fine…. So do you think everyone knows?"

"Yeah," he says anxiously, "And that's what concerns me."

Several minutes later, we find Elliot and he gives us both a warm bear hug. "Thanks for the work," Elliot says as he winks at me, "Gavin and Eddie are dicks….. I am so glad I don't work for those assholes anymore."

"Well I appreciate you working on our house," I tell him, "How long do you think it's going to take."

Elliot blurts out an answer before Christian has the opportunity to stop him. "Three weeks," Elliot says with a jab to Christian's shoulder, "I called in a larger crew and everything. Don't worry…. It will be all handled while you two gone…."

Christian smacks him in the face and Elliot shakes his head. "Shut the fuck up," Christian snaps, "You're ruining everything. What the fuck is wrong with my family tonight…. No one has a filter."

Elliot apologizes, and I squeeze Christian's arm. He gets so cute when he is aggravated. Elliot turns to whisper in my ear.

"By the way…. Your friend Kate is great…. Her and I have had a lot of fun."

I stand back and examine Elliot for a second. What the hell is he talking about? He winks at me and it is suddenly all too clear.

"You're sleeping with Kate?"

He nods, "Gavin and Eddie are bastards. They stole my share of the company and kicked me to the fucking curb, leaving me with nothing. But fuck – Karma is a bitch. Eddie loses you to Christian and I am fucking Kate. Fuck Gavin…. He can't keep him woman satisfied."

My jaw drops – I cannot believe what I am hearing. Christian pulls on my arm and I go to him instantly. I know Christian is angry, but I am not sure why.

"Christian…"

"My brother is an asshole. I cannot believe he told you all of that," Christian growls, "He better have that house ready in three weeks."

"Don't you think that's a little quick?"

He shakes his hand, "I am employing a small country in order to get this done…. The house will be perfect. "

As we move through the party, I see Christian's parents in the distance. I hold closer to Christian and I see Carrick recognize us in the crowd. He nods at Christian and points for the back.

"Ana…. It's lovely to see you," Carrick nods at me, "Christian, I need you to come to the back…. We have a few important things to discuss."

"**We have a problem," Carrick says as he adjusts a few papers on his desk, "Now that rumors of your engagement are quickly spreading through our community… Leighton is making demands." **

I have so much swimming through my mind right now. First of all, it has to be Christian spreading the announcement of our engagement because we have only been officially engaged for a week. And fuck, what the hell is Leighton doing?

"What kind of demands?" Christian asks.

"She wants money or she is going to the press about yours and Ana's affair…." Carrick tells him, "And due to the fact that you're both sitting in front of me and Anastasia has a sizable ring on her finger, I assume the rumors are true."

"Yeah," Christian says completely exasperated, "I had an affair with the mother of my child and now we're getting married…. Who the fuck cares?"

He shakes his head, "She has more…. A lot more."

"How much more?" Christian snaps at his dad.

He takes in a deep breath, "She has a sex tape."

I stop breathing and Christian looks like he is about to explode. "A sex tape? A fucking sex tape?"

He nods, "It's legitimate…. She isn't fucking around this time." How would Carrick know what Leighton and Christian's sex tape is legitimate? Did he watch it? I shake away the bad thoughts and try to focus.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Christian says as he smacks the wall, "Can't she just go away?"

Carrick shakes his head. "You had a two year relationship with the girl…. And you're in the spotlight. She is a scorned lover…. Those types love to go above and beyond."

Christian begins to pace, and I reach for him. "Baby, sit down please," I plead with him, "Sit with me."

He takes a seat and runs both hands through his hair. It suddenly occurs to me that Leighton has more than just a sex tape. She has two years' worth of intimate knowledge of my successful, beautiful billionaire. She could easily go to the magazine with details of their BDSM relationship, and completely drag him through the mud. As one of Christian's lawyers, Carrick knows a lot about his son, but there is no way that he knows anything about his sexual past.

Christian turns to me and when I see the anxiety in his eyes, I know we're thinking the exact same thing.

"Can she be paid off?" Christian asks.

Surprise passes across Carrick's face. "Yes…. But I didn't think you'd want to go that route."

"What I want is for Leighton to go away. We're done and over with…. This "scorned lover" bullshit is driving me insane. I've moved on, and I am not giving Ana another reason to walk out on me."

Christian leans over to kiss me and then turns back to his father. "Pay her off…. Whatever you need to pay her, I don't give a fuck."

Christian walks out of the room, leaving me alone with Christian's father. We both smile awkwardly at each other.

"You know…. When you two get married…. You're signing a prenup."

I'm surprised by his sudden change of conversation topic, but I don't object. I nod my head, "Of course."

"I am glad you're back…." Carrick says with a nod, "I know we didn't start off on the right foot, but I've always liked you…. And I've always liked your Dad. I think you're good for Christian and I think he really loves you."

I nod, still shocked by his words. "Thank you."

"But yeah," Carrick nods, "Pre-nup…. As soon as possible."

**When I finally find Christian, I see the exhaustion in his features…. my poor baby. **I hold him close and place my head in the crook of his neck. I feel the tension in his body wane and I squeeze him tighter

"Do you want to go home?" I ask him softly.

He nods his head. "Yes. Please. I want to hold you and my boy."

"What was this event for?" I ask as he snickers.

"Some charity…. I don't really remember," he says with a shrug.

"So it's true," I hear a sharp voice from the side. I turn to see Grace standing in front of us, her eyes shooting daggers at me.

Christian stands back and holds my hand. "Yes, it's true."

She shakes her head, "What was wrong with Leighton? She didn't leave you when you were at your weakest so obviously she was not a suitable choice."

Her words hurt, but I get it. If some bitch treated my son like I treated Christian, I would feel the same way. Christian grabs my hand and stands very close to his mother.

"No more Mother, I mean it," he snaps, "You better understand – if you want to see me or your grandson ever again, you will accept this. If not, then I don't need your negative bullshit…. Do you understand me mother?"

She nods with a smile but I know it isn't genuine. "I understand."

"Good," Christian snaps as he grabs my hand and ushers me out of the party.


End file.
